almost there

[floridaman2323]

Hey everyone, married for 13 years, been watching hotwife porn for about 10 years, told my wife about it appx 2 years ago. I think we are almost there. When I first told her she just said wow, and she was super shocked. A few months later she said she just liked our sex bc it is comfortable. Then a few months later she said she was scared of stds. I have talked her down from all her excuses and now i think we are at the last one - she can't do it without getting feelings.

Well i don't care if she gets feelings or not, in fact its probably hotter if she does. But i can't say that to her.

so basically now there are three possibilities: 1 she will never do it; 2 she won't do it unless she gets feelings for someone on the side first; 3 i come up with a way to extinguish her last excuse.

I prefer 3, as i think 2 is unlikely and 1 is not satisfying.

Help me out - what do i say?

 

[BullxHorn]

If she’s scared, you could do a SPAM. You can screen guys first and allow your wife to chat to them a bit, he could even wear a mask to hide his face. But maybe tell her you trust her that maybe all she needs to hear

 

[blackmann33]

Feelings in what way? Does she mean she needs to feel a connection to a guy before sex, or that she may develop feelings for him after?

For me, the second is a red flag. But there are no written rules so to each-his-own.

 

[Lynnandhubby]

You really don't want her developing feelings towards someone she's fucking beyond the level of them being friendly and comfortable together if she decides to have a regular. The whole point is to get her to understand that you can have wonderful, mind blowing, multiorgasmic sex with other guys without having the same emotional attachment she has for you.
There are no set rules in this. But the most important of those non rules is to protect your relationship together. Developing feelings for another guy at the start of exploring this lifestyle (which can be an emotional rollercoaster anyway) isn't the best plan as it could undermine your relationship. Later on when you have more experience of this it might be perfectly fine for her to get closer to a particular guy or guys. But I don't think it's such a good idea at the start.