I have the same issue. I've had the same fantasy for 3-4, maybe 5 years now. It's been fustrating to say the least. She's very much into dirty talk during sex. When i talk about another guy fucking her during sex she's all over it. Says how much she would love it. Engages me in the dirty talk conversation. For example how great it would be to have another guy cum all over her tits.
A few years ago on my 45th birthday we visited a sex club - she's 9 years younger than me. Her idea! She found it, and took me there. She's not shy. She walked around that sex club pretty much naked. We even had sex together in the 'couples room". Again she was completely naked sucking my dick and then sat on my dick when there were other people around us having sex. So shortly after that experience having returned from vacation i started getting agressive with the dirty talk conversation, ie: how i wanted to bring this to a reality - find her a bull. She started to get emotional - next thing you know tears. So frustrating! I thought we were so close.
After that experience i was turned off. I didn't even want to have sex with her anymore. I feel like she had been leading me on. Needless to say the sex has been a lot less frequent. And no more dirty talk. I know it wasn't the best move - but somehow, i thought, maybe if i deprive her of sex she'll either dump me, or cheat on me. The cheating would have been great.
Well, that hasn't worked either. So, after about 6 months of either very limited sex or vanilla sex, I started the sex talk again a few nights ago. I read a hotwife blog written by a hotwife, and she suggested that the only way to get a wife to take the plunge is to lead her there by making her feel confident and sexy so she'll want to be a hotwife, and being open with each others wants and needs. Start with porn etc. and continue with a diet of videos in the 2 guys and a girl genre.
Anyway, she was very receptive again during the dirty talk sex. I was very explicit telling her how important this was for me and how i would love for her to join me in this adventure. We even watched a couple MFM vidos (sensual ones) while we had sex. It really turn her on. Again, very receptive, saying how she would love to have a threesome. Meet a guy in a hotel and then bring him back to our room. She even said she was looking for another sex club in spain (we were planning a vacation in may that didn't happen - thanks covid!). I actually was surprised and delighted when she told me). She mentioned she would love to bring a girl into our sex play, she said how increadibly hot it would be to press their breasts together! I suggested we set up an online profile together and find some guys we both like. She said how hot it would be to text a guy back and forth!!! She really responded to the video i chose and watched it intensly - said things like "yeah, fuck her pussy", "she must be so wet with those two guys", while she watched.
So i think she's moving in the right direction. It's just not fast enough for me. I was really hoping that the next day she would bring up our conversation. Maybe say, "hey, remember that conversation we had last night? That was incredibly hot! Do you want to play around on Match.com?" But she hasn't said anything. She's either super hot, and wet, and into it when sex is happing. But then goes cold when we're out of the bedroom.
She's so hot, and i really want to share her. If Sunny Leone and Jenaveve Jolie had a love child - that's what she looks like, maybe with an extra 20 lbs. She has beautiful natural breasts. I've never made her cum by fucking her - only with my mouth. I know she could easily take a bigger cock and really enjoy it. She mentioned early on in our relationship she had a short relationship with a guy with a big dick, and i don't remember her saying she hated it!!
I feel like it's a little like skydiving. It's so scary when that plane door opens, but when your chute opens and you glide down to the ground you wonder why the hell you hadn't done this sooner. You want to do it again right away! I feel like if I can just get her comfortable enough to take that leap, there'd be no holding her back.
If anyone has anymore advice on how to move this along quicker i'd really appreciate it!! Sorry for the long post - just had to get that off my chest