cuckold reality vs fantasy

Nov 24, 2022
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Hey, I am new to this forum. I have hard time knowing whether my cuckold fantasy is something I should pursue. I've seen my gf kiss other men and been flirty with them, and so far I've enjoyed what little I've seen. But I am not sure I am ready to watch her have sex with another man. I enjoy fantasizing about it, but how do you know if you're ready for it? What is the difference between having a cuckold fantasy and watch cuckold porn and actually engage in cuckoldry.

thanks!
 
You will have some extreme cuckold sissy’s here. Some even get thrown into a closet by the bull and beaten up. Whether the stories are true or just their perverted fantasy it’s up to you how far you want to go. It’s all individual. Many of these cuckolds are sick in the mind. Their pathetic perverted existence is their kick. But do what makes you happy and your GF. You sound like a Stag. Not a cuckold.
 
The thought excites you that itself means you like to see your wife more than having sex with her. Share her intimate faceless pics with someone or on some forum & see if the comments excite you or give you a hard on.
I think cuckoldry is where all partners get complete satisfaction. The Bull gets NSA fun, your wife gets to have fun with multiple partners & you get to see the pleasure & satisfaction on your wife's face or the warm satisfaction on your face 🙂
 
The thought excites you that itself means you like to see your wife more than having sex with her. Share her intimate faceless pics with someone or on some forum & see if the comments excite you or give you a hard on.
I think cuckoldry is where all partners get complete satisfaction. The Bull gets NSA fun, your wife gets to have fun with multiple partners & you get to see the pleasure & satisfaction on your wife's face or the warm satisfaction on your face 🙂
I totally agree on the method you proposed. I have talked to many guys that had never done it before but were curious about it. You share pics that you are comfortable sharing with other people, you look at what they say and decide from there. As i mentioned, i have talked to many guys that did it for the first time, and sometimes they realize that the feedback from other people make it a little too real and it makes them uncomfortable. In those cases, fantasy is probably what they are looking for. But in other cases, they find great joy in the feedback, which can be the start to a wonderful and eventful new adventure!
 
No easy answer…

In my experience, there’s a world of difference between the cuckold fantasy, watching cuckold/hot wife genre porn, and the real experience.

The first time I actually saw my wife, in “real life,” having sex with another man was the most heavily conflicted experience I’ve ever had, one I’ll never forget.

Despite years of fantasy, including pillow-talk, role-play, reading stories, looking at cuckold porn, the reality of seeing KK fully engaged, sexually, with another man was absolutely mind-blowing.

I was simultaneously aroused, nauseated, jealous, happy, enraged, elated, a blend of emotions, mostly in conflict. We’re groomed societally, culturally to reject the idea that one’s spouse should be free to engage sexually with someone else. Getting past that is an experience.

From the instant of that first experience, watching her fondle, suck, and fuck another guy, into the days and weeks after, I was still feeling conflicted. In all honesty, before the event, I’d have said “I’m ready.” After, it wasn’t at all what I expected. I oscillated from reliving the moment, the sight of a stranger’s cock sliding into KK’s wet pussy, the intensity, the anxiety, the arousal, to feeling self-loathing and disgust - you’re not “supposed” to enjoy your wife fucking some random guy…

On the balance, I did enjoy it, enough to offset even the most strongly negative emotions and feelings about it. Even right in this moment, as I recall that first time, I can still feel and remember every tiny detail, every sight, sound, scent, every feeling, from intense nausea to overwhelming lust.
 
The thing that I always comes back to is when I think of this happening in REAL life is, how would I REALLY feel after seeing somebody swoop in and turn my wife in to the wanton slut I've always wanted her to be in ONEi night after I have wanted to and tried to have it happen for decades! Would I be as excited as the idea I had built up in my mind? Would her excitement and acceptance of the thrill be enough to carry me on to more? It would really depend on how she related to me afterwards I believe.

If she got lost in NRE and she forgot about me supporting her to get her there then I would spiral into self doubt. I'm just being honest here. It's something I've wanted but, the emotions would be tough! I think for me, I would almost rather not witness it and let her enjoy her own epiphany and hope it leads to better things for me too.

The big fear is that she wouldn't think of her transformation as something we arrived at together after so much time together. I''m hoping and counting on that my wife would would want me to be as happy as she was for ANY achievement she made, whether it was professionally or personally (or sexually). If she suddenly had a sexual fire lit up within her then I'd be thrilled too! I'd just want to be acknowledged and appreciated for getting her there. You can't give a great gift and not expect some gratitude and love for it, right?
 
Most guys are NOT cut out for this lifestyle. The fantasy is real, but IRL, most guys simply would not be able to overcome their feelings of jealousy, etc if another guy was about to have sex with the wife in front of them. Guys on this site love the fantasy and love to chat about it. If you've read anything my husband has written on the topic, he has been pretty clear that it's not easy being married to somebody like me. (in reality, as appealing as it may sound, most wives would not want to be like me either) We know tons of people in the lifestyle and it honestly takes quite a bit of fortitude and skill to be a single guy playing with other wives. It takes an unimaginable amount of those things to be the husband. Most couples are NOT in to hotwifing or allowing the wife to play alone. We see this all the time. imho

Honestly, most wives aren't cut out for this either. I believe that stats show that most wives have "cheated" as have most husbands. It just seems better if the partner doesn't know about it for some reason. Cheating is another game that is tough to play, but has a very important role in the life of couples. That can be a positive or a negative, but it's going to be significant for the most part.

Edit: I will say this also. We see so many hot couples that just play together at "lifestyle" events and don't date. I LOVE "dating". Neither of us gets turned on by the normal, rote, going through the motions sex found at lifestyle clubs. The sex is fake, people are just playing along and the orgasms are mostly fake or non-existent. It's rare for us to "play" at lifestyle clubs, events or even resorts. Dating or getting "picked up", where a guy has to seduce me and I him, is fantastic and I enjoy that. I do enjoy making my husband jealous a bit and "humiliating" him in certain ways (just not like you mostly read about on this site). Those things can be done in a sexy manner and add to the experience. If you've read my stories over the years you've seen how I do this.
 
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Most guys are NOT cut out for this lifestyle. The fantasy is real, but IRL, most guys simply would not be able to overcome their feelings of jealousy, etc if another guy was about to have sex with the wife in front of them. Guys on this site love the fantasy and love to chat about it. If you've read anything my husband has written on the topic, he has been pretty clear that it's not easy being married to somebody like me. (in reality, as appealing as it may sound, most wives would not want to be like me either) We know tons of people in the lifestyle and it honestly takes quite a bit of fortitude and skill to be a single guy playing with other wives. It takes an unimaginable amount of those things to be the husband. Most couples are NOT in to hotwifing or allowing the wife to play alone. We see this all the time. imho

Honestly, most wives aren't cut out for this either. I believe that stats show that most wives have "cheated" as have most husbands. It just seems better if the partner doesn't know about it for some reason. Cheating is another game that is tough to play, but has a very important role in the life of couples. That can be a positive or a negative, but it's going to be significant for the most part.

Edit: I will say this also. We see so many hot couples that just play together at "lifestyle" events and don't date. I LOVE "dating". Neither of us gets turned on by the normal, rote, going through the motions sex found at lifestyle clubs. The sex is fake, people are just playing along and the orgasms are mostly fake or non-existent. It's rare for us to "play" at lifestyle clubs, events or even resorts. Dating or getting "picked up", where a guy has to seduce me and I him, is fantastic and I enjoy that. I do enjoy making my husband jealous a bit and "humiliating" him in certain ways (just not like you mostly read about on this site). Those things can be done in a sexy manner and add to the experience. If you've read my stories over the years you've seen how I do this.
Thanks, this post is so important in terms of dealing with the “reality” of the true dynamic. It has always been my opinion that there are only so many successful couples that can REALLY make this work. I believe it takes an exceptional pairing of partners and exceptional people are rare occurrences in this world. All the crazy, over the top stuff is short lived or just fodder for masturbation. That’s why I enjoy reading your posts! They strike me as real and true and much more interesting.
 
Most guys are NOT cut out for this lifestyle. The fantasy is real, but IRL, most guys simply would not be able to overcome their feelings of jealousy, etc if another guy was about to have sex with the wife in front of them. Guys on this site love the fantasy and love to chat about it. If you've read anything my husband has written on the topic, he has been pretty clear that it's not easy being married to somebody like me. (in reality, as appealing as it may sound, most wives would not want to be like me either) We know tons of people in the lifestyle and it honestly takes quite a bit of fortitude and skill to be a single guy playing with other wives. It takes an unimaginable amount of those things to be the husband. Most couples are NOT in to hotwifing or allowing the wife to play alone. We see this all the time. imho

Honestly, most wives aren't cut out for this either. I believe that stats show that most wives have "cheated" as have most husbands. It just seems better if the partner doesn't know about it for some reason. Cheating is another game that is tough to play, but has a very important role in the life of couples. That can be a positive or a negative, but it's going to be significant for the most part.

Edit: I will say this also. We see so many hot couples that just play together at "lifestyle" events and don't date. I LOVE "dating". Neither of us gets turned on by the normal, rote, going through the motions sex found at lifestyle clubs. The sex is fake, people are just playing along and the orgasms are mostly fake or non-existent. It's rare for us to "play" at lifestyle clubs, events or even resorts. Dating or getting "picked up", where a guy has to seduce me and I him, is fantastic and I enjoy that. I do enjoy making my husband jealous a bit and "humiliating" him in certain ways (just not like you mostly read about on this site). Those things can be done in a sexy manner and add to the experience. If you've read my stories over the years you've seen how I do this.
Ok, this is perfectly written!! WOW, love this!!
 
Ok, this is perfectly written!! WOW, love this!!
This is very, very well said.
I would also add some points I see as a backup to this.
A lot if people start questioning themselves when they start having thoughts about seeing their significant other have sex with another pesron. Are they normal, how come they think about it. Then comes the idea of sharing with their gf\wife. Another barrage of question happens - how she will react, how will she see me after that etc.
Ages people have been hardwired to look out fror cheating because of offspring. But people have evolved to the point this is no longer the issue, knowing who is the father parent etc. Then stigma comes from beliefs and other family opinion. Fear how people will judge you. And it is normal.
Having maturity to analyze those emotions and thoughts, to channel them and having a partner mature enough to understand is crucial.
 
Most guys are NOT cut out for this lifestyle. The fantasy is real, but IRL, most guys simply would not be able to overcome their feelings of jealousy, etc if another guy was about to have sex with the wife in front of them. Guys on this site love the fantasy and love to chat about it. If you've read anything my husband has written on the topic, he has been pretty clear that it's not easy being married to somebody like me. (in reality, as appealing as it may sound, most wives would not want to be like me either) We know tons of people in the lifestyle and it honestly takes quite a bit of fortitude and skill to be a single guy playing with other wives. It takes an unimaginable amount of those things to be the husband. Most couples are NOT in to hotwifing or allowing the wife to play alone. We see this all the time. imho

Honestly, most wives aren't cut out for this either. I believe that stats show that most wives have "cheated" as have most husbands. It just seems better if the partner doesn't know about it for some reason. Cheating is another game that is tough to play, but has a very important role in the life of couples. That can be a positive or a negative, but it's going to be significant for the most part.

Edit: I will say this also. We see so many hot couples that just play together at "lifestyle" events and don't date. I LOVE "dating". Neither of us gets turned on by the normal, rote, going through the motions sex found at lifestyle clubs. The sex is fake, people are just playing along and the orgasms are mostly fake or non-existent. It's rare for us to "play" at lifestyle clubs, events or even resorts. Dating or getting "picked up", where a guy has to seduce me and I him, is fantastic and I enjoy that. I do enjoy making my husband jealous a bit and "humiliating" him in certain ways (just not like you mostly read about on this site). Those things can be done in a sexy manner and add to the experience. If you've read my stories over the years you've seen how I do this.
You may be right when you say "most guys" but for me it has been great, especially when my wife has sex in front of me. She has had four lovers in the last 10 plus years and all of them younger married men. She felt it was safer since single guys might want her to dump me...which she did not want to do. For me?...I felt really proud to have such a sexy wife who was in-demand and she could pick and choose who she wanted. I am also proud that she is so sexy and I enjoy watching her live a sexy life. So it's been just great all around. So, you could be right and if ever a man is jealous...that would just lead to misery and divorce. And oh...by the way...she always had sex only when I was around with her. So ti was always a threesome. She never went solo.
 
Mid 50s cpl here, been into mfm fun about 4 years. Not cuckold at all, we have a guy friend that joins us regularly.
We take turns doing her. It's a fun, sexy, erotic night for all 3 of us.
I will admit I get jealous feelings each time he's with us. He definitely gets more sex time with her and it's damn hot to watch but a into the night I get thinking..why doesn't she react like that with me ? She might, I just can't see the whole picture. Our friend always says how sexy her and I look while we get it on.
I'm 6 ish, he's 8 plus. It's very obvious she likes sex with him but she's never said anything that would make me feel inferior. Never anything about his much bigger dick, how he's better, nothing. He always goes 3 rounds sometimes 4. I go 2 or 3. After he leaves we have a slow lovemaking session befor we fall asleep.
Then she's horny as hell for days after.
But I still get weird feelings.
 
Most guys are NOT cut out for this lifestyle. The fantasy is real, but IRL, most guys simply would not be able to overcome their feelings of jealousy, etc if another guy was about to have sex with the wife in front of them. Guys on this site love the fantasy and love to chat about it. If you've read anything my husband has written on the topic, he has been pretty clear that it's not easy being married to somebody like me. (in reality, as appealing as it may sound, most wives would not want to be like me either) We know tons of people in the lifestyle and it honestly takes quite a bit of fortitude and skill to be a single guy playing with other wives. It takes an unimaginable amount of those things to be the husband. Most couples are NOT in to hotwifing or allowing the wife to play alone. We see this all the time. imho

Honestly, most wives aren't cut out for this either. I believe that stats show that most wives have "cheated" as have most husbands. It just seems better if the partner doesn't know about it for some reason. Cheating is another game that is tough to play, but has a very important role in the life of couples. That can be a positive or a negative, but it's going to be significant for the most part.

Edit: I will say this also. We see so many hot couples that just play together at "lifestyle" events and don't date. I LOVE "dating". Neither of us gets turned on by the normal, rote, going through the motions sex found at lifestyle clubs. The sex is fake, people are just playing along and the orgasms are mostly fake or non-existent. It's rare for us to "play" at lifestyle clubs, events or even resorts. Dating or getting "picked up", where a guy has to seduce me and I him, is fantastic and I enjoy that. I do enjoy making my husband jealous a bit and "humiliating" him in certain ways (just not like you mostly read about on this site). Those things can be done in a sexy manner and add to the experience. If you've read my stories over the years you've seen how I do this.
Very well said… a lot of us are on the fantasy stage, and will probably stay there. For me, it took a lot of courage to tell my wife about my fantasy considering we were still a young couple. She’s never accepted it and like you said, some wives aren’t cut out for it. And it affected our marriage. So for many couples, it will remain a fantasy.

My advice is to have open communication, and you better make sure you are both comfortable. There are couples that fall apart because the husband decided he no longer wanted it, or the wife decided she didn’t want to continue it, etc.
 
Most guys are NOT cut out for this lifestyle. The fantasy is real, but IRL, most guys simply would not be able to overcome their feelings of jealousy, etc if another guy was about to have sex with the wife in front of them. Guys on this site love the fantasy and love to chat about it. If you've read anything my husband has written on the topic, he has been pretty clear that it's not easy being married to somebody like me. (in reality, as appealing as it may sound, most wives would not want to be like me either) We know tons of people in the lifestyle and it honestly takes quite a bit of fortitude and skill to be a single guy playing with other wives. It takes an unimaginable amount of those things to be the husband. Most couples are NOT in to hotwifing or allowing the wife to play alone. We see this all the time. imho

Honestly, most wives aren't cut out for this either. I believe that stats show that most wives have "cheated" as have most husbands. It just seems better if the partner doesn't know about it for some reason. Cheating is another game that is tough to play, but has a very important role in the life of couples. That can be a positive or a negative, but it's going to be significant for the most part.

Edit: I will say this also. We see so many hot couples that just play together at "lifestyle" events and don't date. I LOVE "dating". Neither of us gets turned on by the normal, rote, going through the motions sex found at lifestyle clubs. The sex is fake, people are just playing along and the orgasms are mostly fake or non-existent. It's rare for us to "play" at lifestyle clubs, events or even resorts. Dating or getting "picked up", where a guy has to seduce me and I him, is fantastic and I enjoy that. I do enjoy making my husband jealous a bit and "humiliating" him in certain ways (just not like you mostly read about on this site). Those things can be done in a sexy manner and add to the experience. If you've read my stories over the years you've seen how I do this.
The above is great advice from a wonderful lady.

I believe that the only way you will ever know is by experience. When my wife went on her first date I was excited but I didn't think she would have sex. I was actually disappointed when she didn't.

However, the day he arrived at our home and my wife's clear intent was to take him into our bedroom for sex we had agreed before hand that if I couldn't cope with it there would be no repeat.

As it turned out for the next 14 years she had 5 lovers. These were the most exciting years of our lives.

Her BFs were one at a time and 3 of them were long-term. One for 18 months, one for 5 years and the last for 6 years. For a couple of years she had sex with a BF almost everyday. When I was driving home I used to get excited because I never knew what I would find when I got home. The number of times I found them in bed was thrilling.

I loved every second of those 14 years.

In my case the reality was far better then the fantasy.
 
As an active cuck husband with over 30 years in this LS i will say there is one hell of a difference between the fantasty and reality.

Questions i would pose to you are,

Are you ready for this?
More to the point is she? if you dared ask her....thats your answer.
Mentioning your desires can be very damaging to a relationship, kissing another man innocently is miles away from fucking one,
Is your relationship strong enough and honest enough to deal with this LS?
Are you emotionally ready to see or know she has enjoyed sex with another man who is better more skilled and experienced at pleasuring her than you are?
Then if she says she would like to see him again?
The emotional impact on her if she does this?, to a man sex is sex and enjoyable, to a female its a very emotional activity and attachments are soon formed..
You both say yes to this, you dont feel comfortable afterwards but she does!

I could go on.

The one thing often mentioned in these threads is about my "ex", "first wife" used to, thats a sign.

It can enhance your lives together be exceptionally enjoyable for you both however be warned,

Its a dangerous game you seek to play.
 
"And it affected our marriage. So for many couples, it will remain a fantasy."

One thing my husband and I talk about frequently is that either way, your marriage is going to be affected. This fantasy is one of the most common fantasies married guys have. Most will never mention it seriously to their wives. I believe that most wives wish for sex with other men outside their marriages also. This is borne out by the numbers of admitted affairs by both men and women.

The trouble is this. Do you still have sex with your partner as you've aged? Especially if your partner has no interest in spicing up a sexual relationship? Most couples our age seem to have (just from our observations) little or no sex life any longer. That IS an affected marriage just as much as an open marriage will "affect" the relationship. I believe that sexual frustration is the norm as a couple ages and the marriage continues into older age groups. Eventually, wives just give up on sex and husbands do as well. Maybe they seek an affair, prostitute, or simply masturbate until they too no longer care.

My point is, the end of a marital sex life is a depressing but normal part of a long relationship and aging itself. THAT is an enormous blow to a relationship, although not in the way we may have considered extramarital sex to be. For me, in the end, I have a sex life like I'm a "school girl" in many ways. I love sex, I'm admittedly a "nympho" and can't get enough. I love dating and the pursuit of sex. I love showing my body off to strangers, thus the magazine, calendars, revealing clothing in public and these sites. I love the thought of others getting sexual gratification from my pics, even if we've never met. I love that men I find hot and attractive pursue me and I love giving them what they want. I enjoy doing things their wives won't do. Not simply because of "their pleasure", although pleasuring men is my "kink", but for MY pleasure as well. I love the orgasms and the orgasm I get from another man (or woman actually) is far different than one I attain from masturbation. I would guess it's the same way for men.

So, I hold no illusions that I'm anything but "temporary sexual pleasure" for them but they are the same for me. I don't "fall in love" or anything of the sort. The bottom line from this long post is that either way, extramarital and frequent sex with other partners can be far less destructive than losing the pleasures of sex totally. If a couple can come to grips with that fact, then they might be able to continue to extend their years of sexual satisfaction indefinitely while maintaining a fantastic marriage.

I know I sound a bit bizzare, but EVERY PERSON ON THIS SITE has some sort of kink and fantasy or they wouldn't be here. I'm not afraid to admit it and I'm certain that many of the long time members here understand that I'm a bit "out there". But so are you, even if you don't admit it. I'm not saying that my acting on my fantasies is right for everybody or even many wives. It's just MY way of doing things and I think that many other wives might be able to gain confidence and satisfaction from similar freedom. Most think of women like me as "sluts" and I freely admit I am. I don't care though. I certainly don't want most other people to know anything about this side of me, but I don't regret the way I grew up or the way I am. Hopefully somebody else's wife can find a bit of motivation in this or you husbands can try to relate my situation to them.

Mrs Hw
 
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"And it affected our marriage. So for many couples, it will remain a fantasy."

One thing my husband and I talk about frequently is that either way, your marriage is going to be affected. This fantasy is one of the most common fantasies married guys have. Most will never mention it seriously to their wives. I believe that most wives wish for sex with other men outside their marriages also. This is borne out by the numbers of admitted affairs by both men and women.

The trouble is this. Do you still have sex with your partner as you've aged? Especially if your partner has no interest in spicing up a sexual relationship? Most couples our age seem to have (just from our observations) little or no sex life any longer. That IS an affected marriage just as much as an open marriage will "affect" the relationship. I believe that sexual frustration is the norm as a couple ages and the marriage continues into older age groups. Eventually, wives just give up on sex and husbands do as well. Maybe they seek an affair, prostitute, or simply masturbate until they too no longer care.

My point is, the end of a marital sex life is a depressing but normal part of a long relationship and aging itself. THAT is an enormous blow to a relationship, although not in the way we may have considered extramarital sex to be. For me, in the end, I have a sex life like I'm a "school girl" in many ways. I love sex, I'm admittedly a "nympho" and can't get enough. I love dating and the pursuit of sex. I love showing my body off to strangers, thus the magazine, calendars, revealing clothing in public and these sites. I love the thought of others getting sexual gratification from my pics, even if we've never met. I love that men I find hot and attractive pursue me and I love giving them what they want. I enjoy doing things their wives won't do. Not simply because of "their pleasure", although pleasuring men is my "kink", but for MY pleasure as well. I love the orgasms and the orgasm I get from another man (or woman actually) is far different than one I attain from masturbation. I would guess it's the same way for men.

So, I hold no illusions that I'm anything but "temporary sexual pleasure" for them but they are the same for me. I don't "fall in love" or anything of the sort. The bottom line from this long post is that either way, extramarital and frequent sex with other partners can be far less destructive than losing the pleasures of sex totally. If a couple can come to grips with that fact, then they might be able to continue to extend their years of sexual satisfaction indefinitely while maintaining a fantastic marriage.

I know I sound a bit bizzare, but EVERY PERSON ON THIS SITE has some sort of kink and fantasy or they wouldn't be here. I'm not afraid to admit it and I'm certain that many of the long time members here understand that I'm a bit "out there". But so are you, even if you don't admit it. I'm not saying that my acting on my fantasies is right for everybody or even many wives. It's just MY way of doing things and I think that many other wives might be able to gain confidence and satisfaction from similar freedom. Most think of women like me as "sluts" and I freely admit I am. I don't care though. I certainly don't want most other people to know anything about this side of me, but I don't regret the way I grew up or the way I am. Hopefully somebody else's wife can find a bit of motivation in this or you husbands can try to relate my situation to them.

Mrs Hw
100% agree with what you said. I don’t think you’re “out there” at all. It seems like we all have some common ground here…. I hope that someday my wife will embrace my fantasy and we can try this lifestyle. More importantly, our sex life and both of our confidence needs work. I wouldn’t change anything about our lives or our marriage. I’m still young and impatient, but maybe someday things will change.
 
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Very well said… a lot of us are on the fantasy stage, and will probably stay there. For me, it took a lot of courage to tell my wife about my fantasy considering we were still a young couple. She’s never accepted it and like you said, some wives aren’t cut out for it. And it affected our marriage. So for many couples, it will remain a fantasy.

My advice is to have open communication, and you better make sure you are both comfortable. There are couples that fall apart because the husband decided he no longer wanted it, or the wife decided she didn’t want to continue it, etc.
I watched her kiss a (young) guy and suck his cock. The sex we had after was fucking amazing. I’m hoping for lots more of that. The passionate kissing was the best bit.