You will find that there are conflicting camps here on how to proceed. I’m very much in the stag/vixen camp…we do this together as a team or not at all. We’re also not into the humiliation dom/sub culture. Many here are and, if that floats their boat, so be it. We’ve got a stable, very loving relationship with a great sex life. We are confident in our marriage and use the lifestyle for the instinctive erotic response it generates (sperm competition). As much as I enjoy one-on-one sex with her, my response is always more powerful if I’ve just watched her with another guy, or if she just returned home from a date with sticky panties. We do have rules between us because we are in this together. She plays with others, I don’t. She can play solo but she always lets me know where she is and who she’s with. When she plays, she only plays safe or with a very recent STD test. If she’s going to be away longer than planned, she lets me know. If he’s willing, she takes video or stills and sends them to me. And most important, if things start to get emotional, it ends.
As I noted earlier, others have different rules, and some are of the no rules, no restrictions camp. I don’t know how you do that and still claim to have a marriage because it is an “everything for me“ perspective and not an “us together“ perspective.
There you have it, my $0.02. Best wishes to the both of you. I hope this turns out to be an exciting, erotic adventure for both of you.
