Needing help/advice with morality issue....

[hotwife4u2njoy]

Hi, we are a married couple who have been talking about a fantasy we both share of which my wife either has sex with another man and I watch or join making it a 3some. I really want to see her with a BBC, a whole other fantasy of mine!!! We are not sure if this will transpire or not, as the last hurdle is one of morality. We both have Christian beliefs, however I'm in no way as religious as she is nor her fathers side of the family. My wife is reluctant as she just feels that it is immoral for her to have sex with anyone other than me as she is my wife, and feels it is immoral for me to desire sharing her with another man. I just don't know how to say what I feel which is we are both adults, married, and therefore we should be able to discuss and do whatever we both agree to, not matter what others may think. To be honest, I'm not 100% sure what the whole "morals" are. I feel each person has their own set of morals. Is this wrong? Are morals based more in religious beliefs or teachings? Is there a Christian moral code? I feel our personal married life is only our business, not others, unless we choose to invite them into it. I guess what we are looking for is advice or insight on what others have done, if they had to overcome a morality issue on either partners part. My wife is in no way a prude, however she has only been sexual with 4 men, 2 high school boyfriends, her first husband, and now me. We want to thank you in advance for any input or advice.

 

[BarebackWife]

I had a strict Christian upbringing, it is hard to let go of those standards that have been drummed into you over the years. I’m afraid that if either of you are determined to stick to your beliefs then there is no real way to justify having sex outside of marriage as that is a well established part of the Christian faith.

At the end of the day, if you believe that there is a god and that you will be judged for your behaviour according to what is written in the Bible, then there is very little wriggle room and you should probably give up.

For most people, morality is about fairness, not following a prescribed set of rules. Is it fair that that someone kills an innocent person, all but the insane will say no. Is it fair that two consenting adults that agree to explore new sexual experiences should be able to?

 

[desires0420]

I found this article about morality,

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-morality-5076160

Pretty good read and it might give you a better understanding of where morals might come from and what they are generally based on.

In my opinion whatever happens in the privacy of a marriage is that couple's (and/or the people involved) business, nobody elses.

Hope it helps

 

[hotwife4u2njoy]

I had a strict Christian upbringing, it is hard to let go of those standards that have been drummed into you over the years. I’m afraid that if either of you are determined to stick to your beliefs then there is no real way to justify having sex outside of marriage as that is a well established part of the Christian faith.

At the end of the day, if you believe that there is a god and that you will be judged for your behaviour according to what is written in the Bible, then there is very little wriggle room and you should probably give up.

For most people, morality is about fairness, not following a prescribed set of rules. Is it fair that that someone kills an innocent person, all but the insane will say no. Is it fair that two consenting adults that agree to explore new sexual experiences should be able to?

Thank you for the reply, input, and advice. I myself may be able to release a little of the religious belief, actually I have, however it will be a big step for my wife. We really appreciate the insight....

 

[hotwife4u2njoy]

I found this article about morality,

https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-morality-5076160

Pretty good read and it might give you a better understanding of where morals might come from and what they are generally based on.

In my opinion whatever happens in the privacy of a marriage is that couple's (and/or the people involved) business, nobody elses.

Hope it helps

Thank you!

 

[keylife022]

Hi, we are a married couple who have been talking about a fantasy we both share of which my wife either has sex with another man and I watch or join making it a 3some. I really want to see her with a BBC, a whole other fantasy of mine!!! We are not sure if this will transpire or not, as the last hurdle is one of morality. We both have Christian beliefs, however I'm in no way as religious as she is nor her fathers side of the family. My wife is reluctant as she just feels that it is immoral for her to have sex with anyone other than me as she is my wife, and feels it is immoral for me to desire sharing her with another man. I just don't know how to say what I feel which is we are both adults, married, and therefore we should be able to discuss and do whatever we both agree to, not matter what others may think. To be honest, I'm not 100% sure what the whole "morals" are. I feel each person has their own set of morals. Is this wrong? Are morals based more in religious beliefs or teachings? Is there a Christian moral code? I feel our personal married life is only our business, not others, unless we choose to invite them into it. I guess what we are looking for is advice or insight on what others have done, if they had to overcome a morality issue on either partners part. My wife is in no way a prude, however she has only been sexual with 4 men, 2 high school boyfriends, her first husband, and now me. We want to thank you in advance for any input or advice.

It’s only a moral issue if you choose to make it a moral issue

 

[Robert50]

My wife also believes the lifestyle is immoral. I hounded her so much that four years she agreed have sex with another man one time only. By the time the virus hit, we had brought six men to our bed. Even though she liked it, including my kinky desires, she believes that we are both immoral.

 

[hotwife4u2njoy]

My wife also believes the lifestyle is immoral. I hounded her so much that four years she agreed have sex with another man one time only. By the time the virus hit, we had brought six men to our bed. Even though she liked it, including my kinky desires, she believes that we are both immoral.

So is she basically reluctantly agreeing to satisfy your desires or needs? What has she done to "accept" her own personal immoral actions/behavior?

 

[WNY3somecple]

My wife also believes the lifestyle is immoral. I hounded her so much that four years she agreed have sex with another man one time only. By the time the virus hit, we had brought six men to our bed. Even though she liked it, including my kinky desires, she believes that we are both immoral.

Nobody should ever be hounded into participating.

 

[Cathy]

If she is interested she will go through with it, you could try speeding things along by introducing her to some of your friends that are well hung, you never know what could happen

 

[Cathy]

Nobody should ever be hounded into participating.

if she has willingly fucked six other guys, she not being hounded, she being horny and loves cock

 

[WNY3somecple]

So is she basically reluctantly agreeing to satisfy your desires or needs? What has she done to "accept" her own personal immoral actions/behavior?

I have seen couples who seemingly were both into swinging for years, break up and then you find out she was participating just because he wanted her abd she thought it would help their marriage.

Heck even seem new couples that had trouble finding partners because the experienced couples could tell how much the wife did not really want to be there.

 

[YourNewBull]

Well I'd like to weigh in. Everything im about to post is going to be strange coming from a guy who puts women in collars and leashes and ties them up before using them .

Morality in the Christian tradition is a purely patriarchal tool used to control women. Leviticus is full of rules we don't follow anymore but we love to trot out when society wants to persecute someone. The bible admonishes women to be obedient. That their husbands and father's have absolute authority over them. Throughout history women have been traded for the benefit of their men. A woman cannot sell herself or she is a whore but her father can sell her to secure a favorable alliance. Historically girls pre puberty were betrothed to old men they have never met and probably never wanted to. This was considered moral and acceptable. It was immoral for a woman to wear breeches, they had to ride a horse side saddle. Hell when I grew up even kids knew it was scandalous for a girl to ride a boys bike. Showing your ankles is immoral, then it's the calf then the knees. Different cultures have different standards of morality. If God really had a moral code he planned to measure you against then why is it so fluid and ambiguous?
What you do with your wife is your business and yours alone. If you have to frame it in an antiquated middle eastern religion then you are the master of your house, she is yours to do as you please. It pleases you to share her. Done. In modern society, morality is based on consent. She wants to, you want to, there is no victim. No one is harmed. Therefore it's moral.

 

[hotwife4u2njoy]

Well I'd like to weigh in. Everything im about to post is going to be strange coming from a guy who puts women in collars and leashes and ties them up before using them .

Morality in the Christian tradition is a purely patriarchal tool used to control women. Leviticus is full of rules we don't follow anymore but we love to trot out when society wants to persecute someone. The bible admonishes women to be obedient. That their husbands and father's have absolute authority over them. Throughout history women have been traded for the benefit of their men. A woman cannot sell herself or she is a whore but her father can sell her to secure a favorable alliance. Historically girls pre puberty were betrothed to old men they have never met and probably never wanted to. This was considered moral and acceptable. It was immoral for a woman to wear breeches, they had to ride a horse side saddle. Hell when I grew up even kids knew it was scandalous for a girl to ride a boys bike. Showing your ankles is immoral, then it's the calf then the knees. Different cultures have different standards of morality. If God really had a moral code he planned to measure you against then why is it so fluid and ambiguous?
What you do with your wife is your business and yours alone. If you have to frame it in an antiquated middle eastern religion then you are the master of your house, she is yours to do as you please. It pleases you to share her. Done. In modern society, morality is based on consent. She wants to, you want to, there is no victim. No one is harmed. Therefore it's moral.

Interesting read and take on this. Thank you.

 

[YourNewBull]

Hopefully its helpful

 

[ExhibitionistCpl]

Does your wife ever lie? Does she sin in other ways? Of course the answer is yes. The Bible says all sin is the same, so lying is the same as sleeping with another person. It's not cheating though. Cheating is when you go behind your spouses back.
We are Christians and we both totally know we'll have to repent, when we finally call the lifestyle quits.

 

[hotwife4u2njoy]

Does your wife ever lie? Does she sin in other ways? Of course the answer is yes. The Bible says all sin is the same, so lying is the same as sleeping with another person. It's not cheating though. Cheating is when you go behind your spouses back.
We are Christians and we both totally know we'll have to repent, when we finally call the lifestyle quits.

Thank you

 

[hotwife4u2njoy]

Morality and religion are not the same thing. As long as you do not harm anyone else, anything you can impose on your conscience is moral. There are many immoral religious people. I think there may be another reason why your wife doesn't want it.

Interesting..... Thank you

 

[hotwife4u2njoy]

If she hadn't cheated on you with someone else, I would really say there is a religious problem, but here is another problem and you two can solve it .. have you tried going to a relationship therapist?

I'm not sure what you mean by the beginning of your reply; "If she hadn't cheated on you with someone else" where does that come from? Please explain.

 

[naturalcucky]

I longed for it, talked about it with my wife and we tried it. We are both religious. We both consider each other clean and moral. We really love each other! We believe that by common agreement, morality is not violated. We love this lifestyle!