Advice for unwilling cuckold

[6inches]

It appears Ed Cooke is reading everyone's comments, but NOT saying anything, come on Ed Cooke participate in the story you started!!!

 

[angelboy_20]

I married my high school sweetheart right after I graduated from college. We have generally had a wonderful life together. We had three kids in rapid order after getting married and have built a successful business together; the kids are now adults and one has recently given us our first grandchild. I am still very much in love with my wife, and she tells me the same. The issue is that in recent years I have discovered her having several affairs. The first was a bit less than 9 years ago. When I confronted her about it she cried, apologized, promised that it would not happen again, and pleaded with me not to tell our kids and to forgive her. I did forgive her, and our life together continued essentially as it had been. However, the same thing happened a few years ago. Again I forgave her (I imagine some of you will criticize me for being a gullible fool - I accept that).

Only a month ago, I again discovered that my wife had had sex with another man. Her response this time was completely different. Although she insisted that she still loved me, there was no crying and she told me that she thought I knew what she was doing because it should have been obvious to me that I had never truly satisfied her sexually, adding that she didn't think she "could" stop. Then, she tried to talk me into agreeing that she could date (which I took to mean fuck) other men. She said something like "I want you to be my cuckold." I replied that she had pretty much seen to that already. She then explained to me that being a cuckold these days means not merely having a wife that has sex with other men but condoning or even encouraging it. She said that I should come to this website and learn more about what she called a "cuckold lifestyle" and consider whether it wouldn't turn me on to know that other men were having sex with her. She even offered to let me watch her have sex with other men.

It was as though I had never known my wife of 30 years, and as though she had never known me. Didn't she know that I had always loved only her and always wanted to have a reciprocal, monogamous relationship with her? I didn't know how to respond or what to think. I don't want to divorce my wife, and still love her deeply. We argued about this for the next couple of weeks. Finally, she refused to talk to me about it further until I had spent an hour reading the texts on this site from men happy about being cuckolds. Against my better judgment I did that. What I found was messages from men who were happy having their wives "date" other men, and other men who want their wives to do so. Surprisingly, I found no messages from men like me whose wives wanted to have sex with other men but were opposed to it. My suspicion is that there are others in that third category, and I am writing this message to see if any of them (or men or women who are engaging, have engaged or want to engage in the "cuckold" lifestyle) can offer any advice for convincing my wife to return to a traditional marriage with me. Perhaps there are examples of couples who have regretted involvement in the "lifestyle".

I do not mean to be critical of anyone who has different ideas from mine, but am not interested in any advice to become what is called a "cuckold" here. If anyone is sincerely interested in helping and has constructive ideas, I would like to read them.

Hey, I am not an expert and me too new in this lifestyle. But we as a couple, from beginning agreed to a point that if it happen it will happen only when we both are mutually agreed.
It is for fun and satisfaction but as a married couple it should be mutual, if one can't respect other's choice then marriage is not valuable.
What if it is other way round, you want to be cuckold but she doesn't?
Would you force her to fuck other man against her will?

 

[toolman2c]

I don’t think you are going to get a very balanced response on here I’m afraid as this is a site for people already in the lifestyle or wanting to get into it. Although there are a number of people here who got into it through cheating.
It’s always difficult when the two people in a relationship want very different things especially when that has changed over time and there is no simple solution as every relationship is different.
It sounds to me as though your wife is now at a point in her life where the kids have grown and flown and having been the dutiful wife and mother, she now wants to fulfil her own wants and needs.
If she’s flatly told you that she’s not going to stop having sex with other men then you need to decide how you are going to deal with that because the reality is that’s she’s going to continue with or without your approval.
If you really can’t cope with that, it would be best for both of you to split, as hard as that might be. The alternative is growing resentment and bitterness that will destroy the relationship anyway.

But there are other options if you can handle them. I cheated on my first husband constantly throughout our marriage, he never said anything and neither did I. However, it was never a great relationship (for lots of reasons) so that’s maybe not the best solution.
The other option is that you give cuckolding a go. If the only other choice is splitting up, then what is there to lose? If it turns out not to be for you, then you still have the option of parting amicably. And you never know, if you do try it, you might find it turns you both on watching her getting fucked. Its worked for me and James for over two decades.

Whatever you decide, there going to have to be some frank discussions between you and your wife, as you both need to be happy with whatever direction you take and that might involve some compromises on both your parts.

Hope you find a way through this.
Lynn x

great statement, and Lynn ur super hot in my eyes. I wish u2 lived next door.

 

[toolman2c]

We married at 18, by the time she was 26 it was obvious that I just wasn't up to scratch sexualy I told her that she could get what she wanted with someone else if she wanted but to just be honest and tell me what she was doing, I'm not interested was the reply . Move on a few years, she's just over 30 and a guy hits on her In the factory she works in , she tells me about it saying she turned him down, I repeated my offer if she wanted to go, two days later she told me she was going out with him for a drink, she came home half pissed and fucked making it clear to me that she was going again no matter what, she made the rules and I was not to be involved in anyway what so ever, later when I knew I was getting sloppy seconds when she had been out one night nieve me realised I had had it before and it was before she was fucking with my knowledge so she had been getting what she needed anyway, nothing would have stopped her, she just got it out In the open to make life better for both of us, we are both 75 now she still has a interest on the side but doesn't fuck him much now ,it helped our marriage a lot as it made her a more contented women and a better wife.
I hope this helps you a little it worked for us.

I enjoyed reading, I'm older also 62 with a very str8 laced 46yo redhead wife of 20 years, ur post makes me wonder If I might learn of her years of extra pleasures. I've never wanted 2 share her, til this year I realize she Needs more cock than I can give her. and yes in scared to tell her.

 

[Buttguy]

I don’t think you are going to get a very balanced response on here I’m afraid as this is a site for people already in the lifestyle or wanting to get into it. Although there are a number of people here who got into it through cheating.
It’s always difficult when the two people in a relationship want very different things especially when that has changed over time and there is no simple solution as every relationship is different.
It sounds to me as though your wife is now at a point in her life where the kids have grown and flown and having been the dutiful wife and mother, she now wants to fulfil her own wants and needs.
If she’s flatly told you that she’s not going to stop having sex with other men then you need to decide how you are going to deal with that because the reality is that’s she’s going to continue with or without your approval.
If you really can’t cope with that, it would be best for both of you to split, as hard as that might be. The alternative is growing resentment and bitterness that will destroy the relationship anyway.

But there are other options if you can handle them. I cheated on my first husband constantly throughout our marriage, he never said anything and neither did I. However, it was never a great relationship (for lots of reasons) so that’s maybe not the best solution.
The other option is that you give cuckolding a go. If the only other choice is splitting up, then what is there to lose? If it turns out not to be for you, then you still have the option of parting amicably. And you never know, if you do try it, you might find it turns you both on watching her getting fucked. Its worked for me and James for over two decades.

Whatever you decide, there going to have to be some frank discussions between you and your wife, as you both need to be happy with whatever direction you take and that might involve some compromises on both your parts.

Hope you find a way through this.
Lynn x

Lynn, you are always the voice of reason...at the end of the day, it is what it is...

 

[coastalkid]

I agree with Lynn. You're not going to get a balanced response here. All you're going to get is a one sided overly simplistic reinforcement of you forfeiting everything just so you can have/keep a wife that isn't interested in your happiness. She has already taken advantage of you to the point that she no longer feels any remorse for knowingly doing what she knows was wrong. Time for you to demand what's in it for you.

Your post in and of itself is an outlier here. Most of the time you read about chastity, permanent denial and other crushingly limited opportunities for sexual gratification for cucks. With very rare exception do you get to read about husbands that struggle accepting their situation. Most just let their wives take power and control and leave you at home to do chores.

Tell her you will accept her request to read posts here if she will go to survinginfidelity.com and read some posts there. You'll get the total opposite take there. I'd be out of my mind livid with her for SO many things.

 

[robbiewillsucku]

Guys that want to be cuckold OR you are a cuckold - focus on pleasing her anyway you can including telling her that she can suck and fuck any cock or pussy she wants anytime she wants 1on1 or 3way but you want her to share the details with you afterwards while she rides your face.

December 2023, Hello wantabe cuckold(s). I am Robbie in Norman, Oklahoma, a bimale with a nice c*ck and nice tits.

If you want her to fuck other cocks then after you fuck her - start licking her pussy clean - do this every time you fuck her then after the 10th time - while you are licking her pussy - I am fantasizing that you fucked a cock earlier in the day and I am licking his cum from your pussy. It is all about pleasing you not my cock. I am OK being a sissy cuckold.

I want you to try this on your wife or GF - do this every time when you suck her tit. Suck her tit like a cock. Bounce or bobb your head on her tit just like you would if you were sucking a cock. Do this at least once a week. Third week, start sucking her tit then tell her that you are fantasizing. Hoping she says what are you fantasizing about. If not, suck her tit like a cock then just say -- I am fantasizing that I am sucking your tit like a cock. Don't wait - you say - tell me to suck your tit like a cock. When she tells you to suck her tit like a cock -- sucked harder and deeper.

Three more weeks -- start sucking her tit then you say - tell me to ask --- May I please suck your tit like a cock cause I am a sub sissy faggot cocksucker. Repeat it often to yourself and to her while you are sucking her tit. Yes I am a sub sissy faggot cocksucker - yes I am sucking your tit like a cock. Dry hump her while you are sucking her tit like a cock and you might just cum on her leg or in your panties.

Email me back (robbiewillsucku at gm ail) and tell me how she responded and what you are doing now to please her.

 

[JHotbrewer]

I married my high school sweetheart right after I graduated from college. We have generally had a wonderful life together. We had three kids in rapid order after getting married and have built a successful business together; the kids are now adults and one has recently given us our first grandchild. I am still very much in love with my wife, and she tells me the same. The issue is that in recent years I have discovered her having several affairs. The first was a bit less than 9 years ago. When I confronted her about it she cried, apologized, promised that it would not happen again, and pleaded with me not to tell our kids and to forgive her. I did forgive her, and our life together continued essentially as it had been. However, the same thing happened a few years ago. Again I forgave her (I imagine some of you will criticize me for being a gullible fool - I accept that).

Only a month ago, I again discovered that my wife had had sex with another man. Her response this time was completely different. Although she insisted that she still loved me, there was no crying and she told me that she thought I knew what she was doing because it should have been obvious to me that I had never truly satisfied her sexually, adding that she didn't think she "could" stop. Then, she tried to talk me into agreeing that she could date (which I took to mean fuck) other men. She said something like "I want you to be my cuckold." I replied that she had pretty much seen to that already. She then explained to me that being a cuckold these days means not merely having a wife that has sex with other men but condoning or even encouraging it. She said that I should come to this website and learn more about what she called a "cuckold lifestyle" and consider whether it wouldn't turn me on to know that other men were having sex with her. She even offered to let me watch her have sex with other men.

It was as though I had never known my wife of 30 years, and as though she had never known me. Didn't she know that I had always loved only her and always wanted to have a reciprocal, monogamous relationship with her? I didn't know how to respond or what to think. I don't want to divorce my wife, and still love her deeply. We argued about this for the next couple of weeks. Finally, she refused to talk to me about it further until I had spent an hour reading the texts on this site from men happy about being cuckolds. Against my better judgment I did that. What I found was messages from men who were happy having their wives "date" other men, and other men who want their wives to do so. Surprisingly, I found no messages from men like me whose wives wanted to have sex with other men but were opposed to it. My suspicion is that there are others in that third category, and I am writing this message to see if any of them (or men or women who are engaging, have engaged or want to engage in the "cuckold" lifestyle) can offer any advice for convincing my wife to return to a traditional marriage with me. Perhaps there are examples of couples who have regretted involvement in the "lifestyle".

I do not mean to be critical of anyone who has different ideas from mine, but am not interested in any advice to become what is called a "cuckold" here. If anyone is sincerely interested in helping and has constructive ideas, I would like to read them.

If you feel will always be unhappy and jealous and get no pleasure from your wife's sex with other men, then it's not easy to explain or persuade. Of course there are many variations on this lifestyle. Some indulge it because they can not satisfy their wives but want to see their wives satisfied. Others, like me, can and do satisfy their wives, but get also huge pleasure from seeing their wives seduce or be seduced by other men, from seeing and hearing them enjoy being fucked and used by other men. It's not something I or most can really explain or persuade you on really. Either you get it or not. Sorry

 

[Jeanswatcher]

Having re read your original post, something sprung to mind that i missed the first time i read it,

"She said that I should come to this website and learn more about what she called a "cuckold lifestyle" and consider whether it wouldn't turn me on to know that other men were having sex with her. She even offered to let me watch her have sex with other men".

In a way she is manipulating you by pointing you towards this site, here you will read a lot of positive experiences from men who are happy and accept the LS, me included. So you will pick up the positives here as its a cuckold website, yet to most "normal couples" what is written here would make then cringe and few would venture here if they were not that way inclined in someway.

It exactly the same as going onto a line dancing website and expecting balanced posts from people who like and those that hate it, it could happen but very unlikely.

In way you are simular to me as its the female that wants to engage in this LS, which i suspect is quite rare. The difference is she actively wants to push you into accepting it and my wife apparently always knew i would, she just needed a way to broach the subject, covertly manipulating me without coming accross as enthusiastic. She also just wanted one lover, she already had and sought my acceptance of this.

She has never looked at this site, saying: i am one who likes to do it, rather than read about it.

So basically you have two choices, accept or not. The difficult bit is should you choose to say NO what happens next, to some females this is in their DNA so she will not change, its just if you can live with her knowing but not liking this part of her personality.

 

[PNNP]

If you feel will always be unhappy and jealous and get no pleasure from your wife's sex with other men, then it's not easy to explain or persuade. Of course there are many variations on this lifestyle. Some indulge it because they can not satisfy their wives but want to see their wives satisfied. Others, like me, can and do satisfy their wives, but get also huge pleasure from seeing their wives seduce or be seduced by other men, from seeing and hearing them enjoy being fucked and used by other men. It's not something I or most can really explain or persuade you on really. Either you get it or not. Sorry

Always a game of risk, pleasure and rewards! If it hurts and trouble you more than it give, then its not for you.

For most, I believe fantasy is the ultimate edge, for the small percentage, sky is the limit

 

[Dogdong]

I'm sure that this is well meant; certainly it is a highly polished presentation featuring an absolutely gorgeous, alluring actress; and I do have a sense of humor. However, it (particularly the quote in the first one) is a bit close to home for me right now. I'm not going to include them in the scrapbook of my married life, but may find a more satisfying use for them if my separation becomes permanent.

That actress is actually @Hwcouple702 !😊. I would recognize that sexy ass anywhere!

 

[droopy1]

Having re read your original post, something sprung to mind that i missed the first time i read it,

"She said that I should come to this website and learn more about what she called a "cuckold lifestyle" and consider whether it wouldn't turn me on to know that other men were having sex with her. She even offered to let me watch her have sex with other men".

In a way she is manipulating you by pointing you towards this site, here you will read a lot of positive experiences from men who are happy and accept the LS, me included. So you will pick up the positives here as its a cuckold website, yet to most "normal couples" what is written here would make then cring and few would venture here if they were not that way inclined in someway.

It exactly the same as going onto a line dancing website and expecting balanced posts from people who hate it, it could happen but very unlikely.

In way you are simular to me as its the female that wants to engage in this LS, which i suspect is quite rare. The difference is she actively wants to push you into accepting it and my wife apparently always knew i would, she just needed a way to broach the subject, covertly manipulating me without coming accross as enthusiastic. She also just wanted one lover, she already had and sought my acceptance of this.

She has never looked at this site, saying: i am one who likes to do it, rather than read about it.

So basically you have two choices, accept or not. The difficult bit is should you choose to say NO what happens next, to some females this is in their DNA so she will not change, its just if you can live with her knowing but not liking this part of her personality.

I hate line dancing.

 

[tinytim]

A lot of good advice here. Wife told me she was fucking a friend of our neighbour, I loved my wife and decided to try and accept it and be supportive. She was very appreciative and did everything she could go help me through my angst, which made our relationship even stronger. Nearly 5 years on We have a cuckold marriage and are both happy.

 

[dickhurtz]

For the most part the advice/comments I've gotten here have been sympathetic and constructive, which I appreciate. As someone said earlier, perhaps that's more than I should have expected since it appears most users of the site are enjoy the "lifestyle" (my wife knows that because she opened this account and used it to find at least the last of the other men with whom she had sex, and that is probably why she told me to look at it). Clearly I have a lot to think about before talking with her over our dinner out.

I do have one question about the suggestion that I "embrace her as a Hotwife". I may not be understanding the terminology, but I assume embracing her as a Hotwife means that I tell her that it is OK to have sex with whoever she wants. If that is right, then wouldn't I BE a "cuckold"? (If I were to do that, I suppose it doesn't matter what I call myself but I want to be sure I understand the advice).

my comments in this post are, only, relevant to the post quoted. they are not reflective of any future posts or comments.

ed;
the term "cuckold" means different things to different people. personally, i think folks, here, use the term because it's part of the vernacular. you can refer to your self anyway you want, but it doesn't change the circumstances..

the only thing that matters here is your wife is having sex with other guys, & you can't accept that, period. what you call it is irrelevant, & getting hung up on what it's called is, seemingly, causing you more angst than her behavior.

i recommend some professional, non-judgmental counseling & try to come to an agreement.

bear in mind, not all negotiations achieve a, mutually, acceptable solution.

good luck. i hope it works out for both of you.

edit;....unfortunately, i wrote this before the dinner conversation & the events that followed.

if some guy treated me like he treated you, he would have, certainly, left the house, but it would have been in an ambulance, with her riding shotgun.

 

[dickhurtz]

I think it is normal to start thinking about what may have happened and all sorts of things pop into the head. You talk about your sexual gratification. It is likely that it is her lack of sexual gratification for many years that has pushed her to this. She must have been so needing and wanting a good fucking for years. Some women have a very strong sex drive and need to be satisfied regularly. Imagine her frustration.
Some years ago I was approached by a married woman, and they had agreed to a cuckold lifestyle. I was with them for 17 years after that. He was usually present and took to his role quickly and easily. The first few months of our relationship she was insatiable from so many years of being denied sexual gratification. He agreed to be caged as initially he would spurt as soon as he saw me penetrate her. This worked to stop him ejaculating early and he would then get very aroused and liked to help and be involved. He quickly become very skilled at giving oral pleasures and loved to clean up after each encounter.
If you are unable to reconnect with your wife how do you see your future sex life, knowing that you have a problem with early/prem ejaculation. Will any future partner be satisfied, or like your wife will she need to seek a service outside the relationship. As a woman she will need and deserve the pleasure of a decent cock penetrating and ejaculating deep inside her. This is what a Bull provides.

my comments in this post are, only, relevant to the post quoted. they are not reflective of any future posts or comments.

personally, i don't think her cheating is, totally, a result of her dis-satisfaction with their sex life. i think that it was her rationalization for her behavior. i would also ask the wife to define the word "love". what it means to her would be interesting to know.

maybe it was the potential for a great marriage based on financial prospects, an upper middle class income & life style, children, grandchildren, family & friends & all the trappings life offers.

after reading about the after dinner fiasco, i don't think she has a sincere bone in her body. (no pun intended).

 

[dickhurtz]

you should have a serious talk with her........talk about all the scenarios and situations.........if you go down cuckolding path........how and what your role will be........will it undermine your roles as a husband or not...........whether you should be stag.........the boundaries........

have a escape door for yourself.........if it doesnt work out.........and you dont get your end of the deal.........

my comments in this post are, only, relevant to the post quoted. they are not reflective of any future posts or comments.

she, at this point, is beyond the conversation stage. what would be the point? her narcissistic, lying & selfish behavior has eliminated any chance of a mutual understanding. that stunt with brian would have ended it all, for me. even though my wife had several lovers, over the years, with my knowledge, a stunt like that would have spelled doom for her.

 

[dickhurtz]

I think this is what is happening and you would understand the problem that I believe the wife is facing. As she ages she wants her needs and desires to be fulfilled and if she has sampled the pleasures that are to be had, she will only have one thing on her mind. I think her desire to cuckold Ed was a genuine attempt to satisfy her hunger and also attend to his pleasures and what he could gain from the lifestyle. An alpha male can provide and satisfy her needs as long as she has access to the cock that provides that pleasure.

my comments in this post are, only, relevant to the post quoted. they are not reflective of any future posts or comments.

i disagree. if she was concerned about ed's ability to find pleasure in her LS choices, she would have confessed 20+ years ago when the cheating started. i don't think sexual satisfaction was her only motivation to start cheating. she is more complicated than that.

 

[dickhurtz]

I think this is so accurate. Ageing hubby needs to understand that the wife is getting hornier and needs a younger, bigger, stronger cock. Hubby's role is to help, watch, enjoy and be prepared to learn how to please her by being great at cleanup and not being afraid to handle/guide and suck her lovers cock. This brings them together as a couple with the same target for sexual pleasures.

my comments in this post are, only, relevant to the post quoted. they are not reflective of any future posts or comments.

you are trying to paint all husbands with the same brush. it just doesn't work that way. he gets to pick the relationship that he wants, not what others think his roll should be. he is not obligated to do anything he doesn't want to do, no matter what the circumstances are. forcing someone to do something that they don't want, for their satisfaction, is narcissism. it is not love.

 

[charlie141r42]

Fundamentally I think you are right that my wife is not being honest about thinking that i could be happy in this sort of lifestyle, though I cannot deny that there is something viscerally exciting about imagining the woman you love having sex with another man.

I also think, though, that my wife is taking the easy way out of an issue, and being very selfish in not considering other solutions to her perceived sexual needs. I definitely do NOT have a low sex drive, though I admit that perhaps I'm not very good at it. I would do anything sexual with her that she wanted, and have told her so. Notwithstanding, she seems not to be giving me a chance any more, just turning to other men who simply want to use her body for their pleasure. She continually turns me down when I want to have sex, and usually tries to satisfy me with very perfunctory hand jobs.

Your wife has developed a liking for strangers cocks and has been enjoying them for at least the first time you discovered it, so highly likely there have been a lot more than you know about. She was disccrete in the past most likely because your kids had not left the nest then, but now with them older she really doesn`t care and is going to do whaterver she wishes. Keping you around as a cuckold would still be convenient for her, but if you do not want to be a cuck then I don`t see why you should. By your own admission sex with her now is pretty crap with little or no interest or input from her, so why not tell her if you decide you decide to stay married to her, that you do not intend doing so as her cuckold, but that you would be prepared to swing with other couples. That way she can still get the stranger cock she want, and you could have sex with someone who actually wants to have sex with you.

 

[droopy1]

Your wife has developed a liking for strangers cocks and has been enjoying them for at least the first time you discovered it, so highly likely there have been a lot more than you know about. She was disccrete in the past most likely because your kids had not left the nest then, but now with them older she really doesn`t care and is going to do whaterver she wishes. Keping you around as a cuckold would still be convenient for her, but if you do not want to be a cuck then I don`t see why you should. By your own admission sex with her now is pretty crap with little or no interest or input from her, so why not tell her if you decide you decide to stay married to her, that you do not intend doing so as her cuckold, but that you would be prepared to swing with other couples. That way she can still get the stranger cock she want, and you could have sex with someone who actually wants to have sex with you.

Good Idea. Some cuckoldresses like to have lovers but make their husbands remain chaste.