How did you come to this lifestyle?

I am a wannabe. It just came to me naturally. The first time it was offered was a ex GF who I had confessed my desires to during phone sex. She offered an MFM with a gay priest she was sleeping with. Alas it was not the time for me. Even though she was an ex, the idea of the emotional angst of seeing her with another man was too much for me and I turned down the offer.
 
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About 3 years into an otherwise near perfect relationship my wife confessed that she had been cheating on me. Intially I had the gambit of negative emotional reactions to this revelation. However we decided that we did not wish end an otherwise good marriage and find a way to deal with it.
It did not happen overnight and took a lot of conversation before somthing happened that set us onto an amiable path to resolve our sexual conundrum.
We were into the whys and wherefores of why she felt the need to seek sexual gratification elsewhere. It was already ( to my relief ) established that she was only seeking sex kicks not an attached relationship with anyone.
That itself could still have derailed our marriage but then I started to get aroused by more of the detail of why she was unsatisfied.
The short version of our discourse was that although other parts of our sexplay were good she was totally unsatisfied by the actual fucking. She craved a much higher level of stimulation which my (tiny) penis did not satisfy. All of her former lovers may not all have been hugely endowed but even the smallest guy she had ever been with was much bigger than me. Her previous bf before me was very well hung though and she broke up with him for other reasons but the sex was the best she ever had. She got through a few years of sexual disatisfaction with me ( faked all of her enjoyment when I fucked her) but lust took hold and when a random opportunity arouse she succumbed to it.
He gave her Os. She liked it very much. She never had considered herself to be a size queen but she found she had been spoiled by enjoying much bigger than I could provide. The sight of just a big swinging dick let alone playing with a hard one got her juices flowing.
I became supremely aroused ( which I found quite odd to tell the truth)
She noticed my reaction and I had to admit I was totally turned on by not just her dalliances but because of the ' humiliation' factor in regards to my lack of size and their 'superiority'
I started looking into the tiny dick thing and discovered that I had developed a fetish that had only partially come in to fruition before this blossomed it.
Certainly not right away but within a few months we were exploring sex with other guys and couples. At first I was more directly involved but gradually was quite happy to just watch other guys fuck her. Loved seeing her orgasmic reactions ( true not fake ones) while I played with my little penis.
 
All started when Im was asking 3 some and she was saying thats fine if her ex bf is that other guy, well while he was fucking my wife he was overtalk her to having sex with him without condom and later started sex relationship with him.
 
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I was always an alpha male growing up and in business. Wife and I have been together (married) for over 40 years. We both still fit into clothes from high school and college - in good shape.
I got tired of always making decisions and being responsible for everything and everyone. so over a short period of time, started to NOT make decisions and she gradually started to make more decisions in relationship.
We had discussions about someone else fulfilling her needs because I had multiple affairs early on and this created other issues.
she didn't want to at first because of concerns about disease, religion, etc but slowly the idea took root.
Then we started to enjoy more light bondage with her in control. ******** - she would sit on my face and ******** in my mouth.
These things that put her in control over me and the sexual relationship. and things grew from there...
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