Travel with the boyfriend

So in a strange turn of events starting a couple weeks ago, I got a text from her boyfriend (we are super cool and he clears things with me) asking if it would be OK for him to ask my wife to attend a work function with him. I agreed and he asked her and she went and had fun playing the role of new girlfriend at the work party. She met his boss and they sat with him during dinner and the boss invited her along on the upcoming work trip to France. My wife told me about it laughed and shot it down. I asked, why not go? Of course a thousand reasons can be given to not do something requiring travel overseas/time away etc. She works remotely so no time off needed and it is an opportunity for her. I supported the idea and paid to get her passport renewal expedited, which appears to be going to be ready in time. She hasn't locked in 100% yet but I want her to go. Am I crazy for this? In the same situation would you let her go? (bear in mind she wasn't thinking it was even possible it was me pushing so they can get a bit closer relationship wise, we have physical part down)
 
I still want to know why your wife "laughed and shot it down" at first? What was it that made her feel that way? Why did she dismiss it at first with a laugh? I wonder what she was thinking?

As to you, you've already had a few experiences having a hot wife. I've read most all of your posts, she's done some crazy/fun things. The biggest question is are you ready for this next step up? Chances of it happening again after this time seem more likely. You'll have lots of time alone to sort through your feelings. You won't want to pester her with calls and emails so she'll enjoy herself. With the time difference and with her unique opportunity she may be too distracted to remember to check on you. No way of knowing. You just have to trust, right?
 
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I still want to know why your wife "laughed and shot it down" at first? What was it that made her feel that way? Why did she dismiss it at first with a laugh? I wonder what she was thinking?

As to you, you've already had a few experiences having a hot wife. I've read most all of your posts, she's done some crazy/fun things. The biggest question is are you ready for this next step up? Chances of it happening again after this time seem more likely. You'll have lots of time alone to sort through your feelings. You won't want to pester her with calls and emails so she'll enjoy herself. With the time difference and with her unique opportunity she may be too distracted to remember to check on you. No way of knowing. You just have to trust, right?
We have been having sex with the BF but that is pretty much been the focus. He likes her, its new, I get it but she is a married woman not really looking to be away from home for extended periods of time, we have a lot of commitments and a busy schedule. I thought it would be a fun break for her and I really want her to be able to go and just wind down, be in the moment type thing for a few days. I prefer if she sort of doesn't check in for a couple days at a time, she can if she wants but maybe try not doing so. Life is hectic. If we are breaking the rules already what does it hurt to break a couple more in the big picture?

She and I sat down and talked about how this new phase of having another sex partner was crazy but we are doing it, with that assumption we are looking at this like lets see where things take us. and be open minded about what we are doing. I have read it is best to not have an emotional connection with the pertner but she doesn't have sex multiple times with some rando even if I pushed for it, maybe a one off but not like this. I like seeing her giddy phase in early relationship time. If she is happy I am happy, oddly it started the opposite with me pushing to see something I wanted and her agreeing to make me happy so kinda full circle. Crazy, I know.
 
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So, did she laugh it off because she thought it would be too selfish of her to ask? Did she laugh it off because she was uncertain how you would feel about it? I think her mentioning it in the first place was done because she felt like there was an outside chance that it could possibly happen.

I've traveled quite a bit and it isn't always so easy to stay in touch back home and you responded that you respect her privacy to experience an opportunity of a lifetime for her. It's clear you are focused on her having fun by sacrificing time you would get to have with her. It truly is a unique opportunity and you trust your wife so you're supporting her decision. Seems like everything is upfront and honest.

Projecting ahead, I'll bet the day she comes home to you will be an anxious one. I'd have to think after that amount of time you'd have all kind of thoughts whirling around in your head while at the same time suppressing the urge to bury her with questions. Will things go back to as they were before her trip or will there be new changes?
 
So, did she laugh it off because she thought it would be too selfish of her to ask? Did she laugh it off because she was uncertain how you would feel about it? I think her mentioning it in the first place was done because she felt like there was an outside chance that it could possibly happen.

I've traveled quite a bit and it isn't always so easy to stay in touch back home and you responded that you respect her privacy to experience an opportunity of a lifetime for her. It's clear you are focused on her having fun by sacrificing time you would get to have with her. It truly is a unique opportunity and you trust your wife so you're supporting her decision. Seems like everything is upfront and honest.

Projecting ahead, I'll bet the day she comes home to you will be an anxious one. I'd have to think after that amount of time you'd have all kind of thoughts whirling around in your head while at the same time suppressing the urge to bury her with questions. Will things go back to as they were before her trip or will there be new changes?
All good questions. No way to know in advance. We like having him as part of our lives but having a two plus one at times we wa t him around as as 3 even party thing. She needs some additional time to level up there, this will present some opportunity for that to grow.
 
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So we have the passport in hand thanks to dropping some $ and using an attorney and a trip to Regional center, whew! She has some paperwork to complete for his corporate travel that could be interesting, it asks the married/single and emergency contact info, in the interest of honesty she will fill it out and hope only some paper pusher needs to see it. It is looking 85% like it is happening.
 
So in a strange turn of events starting a couple weeks ago, I got a text from her boyfriend (we are super cool and he clears things with me) asking if it would be OK for him to ask my wife to attend a work function with him. I agreed and he asked her and she went and had fun playing the role of new girlfriend at the work party. She met his boss and they sat with him during dinner and the boss invited her along on the upcoming work trip to France. My wife told me about it laughed and shot it down. I asked, why not go? Of course a thousand reasons can be given to not do something requiring travel overseas/time away etc. She works remotely so no time off needed and it is an opportunity for her. I supported the idea and paid to get her passport renewal expedited, which appears to be going to be ready in time. She hasn't locked in 100% yet but I want her to go. Am I crazy for this? In the same situation would you let her go? (bear in mind she wasn't thinking it was even possible it was me pushing so they can get a bit closer relationship wise, we have physical part down)
I would never ever let a wife or girlfriend go with another man to.go.overseas. Two.many posdible scenarios tgat could cause problems medical, legal in another country in.the usa or your own country but never outside there country there could ve alot of unexpected legal.problems
 
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I would never ever let a wife or girlfriend go with another man to.go.overseas. Two.many posdible scenarios tgat could cause problems medical, legal in another country in.the usa or your own country but never outside there country there could ve alot of unexpected legal.problems
Well, a little late for that.
 
Am I crazy for this? In the same situation would you let her go? (bear in mind she wasn't thinking it was even possible it was me pushing so they can get a bit closer relationship wise, we have physical part down)
Maybe? I can't imagine letting my wife travel to Paris with another man, let alone even spending the night somewhere. It seems like you're doing everything possible to cultivate a romance between the two that could jeopardize your marriage. It's happened to people on here before... However strong your relationship is, the excitement and romance of an early relationship is very powerful and I wouldn't assume you can predict how things might evolve.

Then again, I'm an outsider, I don't know your relationship, so who knows... just seems like you're risking a lot if things start moving in a bad direction for you.
 
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Maybe? I can't imagine letting my wife travel to Paris with another man, let alone even spending the night somewhere. It seems like you're doing everything possible to cultivate a romance between the two that could jeopardize your marriage. It's happened to people on here before... However strong your relationship is, the excitement and romance of an early relationship is very powerful and I wouldn't assume you can predict how things might evolve.

Then again, I'm an outsider, I don't know your relationship, so who knows... just seems like you're risking a lot if things start moving in a bad direction for you.
I appreciate the advice. Yes, I do want that relationship between them. It doesn't have to be him or I, it can be him AND I. We are already way down the physical path with him. I do not know why I am so fascinated with having her build this relationship, and I know it is dangerous, but I am like a moth to a flame at this point.I don't think I can rest until she gets there.
 
It doesn't have to be him or I, it can be him AND I.
I mean, from your perspective yes, and it may be what you desire but long-term, it may not be what he or the wife end up wanting. I think many women, though of course not all, while they enjoy the excitement of a new lover and being shared, there is also some part of them that desires to be with a man who wants to possess them (but, you know, isn't overly possessive).

I know with my wife, while she gets excited at the idea of being shared and being a naughty slut, I know there is also a part of her that is a bit disappointed if I don't get a little jealous. I think the fantasy is only okay for her because she knows I get off on her being a slut but then also want to reclaim her - its the fact that it makes me want her more that is hot for her. I think if I encouraged her to form a relationship with another man and seemed to ambivalent or even encouraged her to go have romantic fun away from me, she would begin to lose respect and interest in me, which could lead into dangerous territory.

But, like I said previously, your situation and wife may be totally different and I'm not saying it can't work - just that there is a risk. I do totally understand the thrill though of engaging in what might be a somewhat dangerous game, just try not to get burnt too bad haha.
 
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My wife prefers this kind of relatinship with Lovers, where they develop personal and emotional attachments and a desire to be together in situations where they appear to be a couple. We tried, early on, "hot wifing" and me being there when she fucked guys, but it just didn't work for her......especially me being there and ruining the mood by asking stupid questions, making jokes, etc. I realize I screwed up, but I don't think it really affected the outcome........she simply likes to make love and not fuck for fun. She is NOT my personal porn star.

Most of her affairs have been with co-workers, and usually last 6 months to a year, which is about how long it takes their wife/gf to start questioning all the overtime they are working, LOL. Her longest affair though was with her Boss/Lover. It lasted 11 years and really only ended due to Covid (he got really weird over it). I find these types of relationships, as does Mr. Phun Times also, to me MUCH more interesting and fulfilling for myself (as well as for my wife also).

In that time together, they traveled thousands of miles together for business as well as pleasure. All over the US and some international travel as well. One time in DC he had reserved a "bridal suite" (he prefers suites when they travel and it was the only one available). He never thought another thing about it, and when they got there EVERYONE on staff was treating them like newly weds!! LOL Calling her Mrs. Boss/Lover, offering them special treatment, special gifts in the room, etc, etc. She was LOVING it, and they decided to just go with it......they had so much fun with the pretense that they extended their stay through the following week, mostly because she knew she would be fertile that week and they decided it would be a GREAT time to act on their desire for a pregnancy. They were out walking around Chevy Chase one evening looking for a restaurant and he suddenly hustled her into a jewelry shop and bought her a small diamond ting to wear in place of our wedding ring (since they were newyweds, LOL. She started wearing it when they traveled after that, and wore it on a chain around her neck when at home. She still wears that chain/ring even though they ended the relationship.

The also spent a month together at the Corporate Condo in Florida doing "business planning" (actually did a lot of real planning) and on those trips she left her diaphragm (all the birth control she uses) at home on my pillow. One time she came home from that trip still recovering from some cosmetic surgeries she agreed to have (without discussing it with me!!) at his request and paid for by the company. Just a few facial touchups, but the biggest was a breast reduction and version of a "mommy makeover" that included relocating fat from other areas into her hips and butt. Think "kardashian look" for a visual. Still had a LOT of bruising and stitches, etc and I admit I was a bit PISSED initially......but when I was able to view the outcome minus stitches, pain meds, and bruises.......WOW!!

Getting too long, not trying to hikack the thread, but the point is SOME of us enjoy a serious relationship where our wife becomes really involved with their Lovers, not just an occasional romp in the hay deal. If you believe the stories here, that does appear to be the most common situation and what most guys want from this. SOme of us just enjooy the risk of a more personal emotional development. CW