Dont think she is ready as I thought.

[tjlove23]

My wife has had solo dates multiple times and doesn't really like strangers. She has played without me there and probably will again. She wants to be friends first which is fine with me.

She has agreed to go to a club with me. We agreed it would be just seeing what it is about and not going home with anyone. I am starting to think she isn't as ready because she is raising some doubts and as not as excited as she was after we had an intense night of sex.

As excited about the possibly of seeing her find a couple, I do still love her and don't want it to be a bad experience. I feel I have to delete the swinger account We made and cancel our trip. She hasn't asked, but I want it feel right for her.

I just wish I could delete my desire to see her with someone else as easily as I delete the account at the club.

 

[Nakednerds]

Slow and easy my friend and communicate, communicate, communicate. Mutual respect is the cornerstone of any relationship, especially when playing around with sexual norms. You are already way past many men and you should be very happy with where you are now. We have had a swinger account for many years. We keep it even thought we don't always use it. Its fun to just see what other people are doing. My lovely lady doesn't look at it much. I occasionally make a suggestion to her and we go over things together. If she says no, we laugh and move on. No big deal. Having a woman who will talk about sex, even if she says no, is a great blessing. You are living the dream already.

 

[tjlove23]

Slow and easy my friend and communicate, communicate, communicate. Mutual respect is the cornerstone of any relationship, especially when playing around with sexual norms. You are already way past many men and you should be very happy with where you are now. We have had a swinger account for many years. We keep it even thought we don't always use it. Its fun to just see what other people are doing. My lovely lady doesn't look at it much. I occasionally make a suggestion to her and we go over things together. If she says no, we laugh and move on. No big deal. Having a woman who will talk about sex, even if she says no, is a great blessing. You are living the dream already.

I agree I have lived the dream. I am at the point where I am thinking maybe just because it is good for me, it isn't for her. She has accommodated long enough.
.

 

[Nakednerds]

You won't know the real answer to that until you have an honest, open conversation with her.

Mrs NakedNerds and I have been doing this for 8 years out of our 10 year marriage. I talk to her after every sexual encounter about how it made her feel, did she enjoy it, is it repeatable, etc. I don't needle her to give me answers, it is just a pleasant conversation about an experience she has had. I learn a lot from these conversations about what she likes and what kind of guys she is attracted too, etc. It has become part of the thrill for both of us.

I make sure that she is absolutely doing this for her own pleasure not for me. Due to our open, honest conversations I don't have to wonder what she is thinking about. I know there are times when she is disappointed and ready to quit and other times when it is an exhilarating experience she can't wait to repeat. Both of those easily reside in the same persona. The same for me.

The first year we stopped swinging and started finding men for her she went dick crazy. There were weeks when she set up dates with 3 different guys. One memorable time we still laugh at she mistakenly set up 2 afternoon dates at the same exact time with two guys who had the same first name. Some of those weekends when we were meeting different guys on Friday afternoon, Saturday night, and Sunday afternoon I would think this is too much, maybe we should stop. But she calmed down and it is a more reasonable pace now.

 

[Cockneyal]

Maybe get her to video when she plays alone and watch together it might help her anxiety. She might feel guilty that showing you how much she enjoys another man.

 

[Cockneyal]

And if either of your trust is even as low as 99%, don't go there. Divorce is on the cards.

 

[Nakednerds]

Maybe get her to video when she plays alone and watch together it might help her anxiety. She might feel guilty that showing you how much she enjoys another man.

She and her lover made a video the first time she played alone. The video was very badly made but they had fun making it and I enjoyed it later.

 

[tjlove23]

Update. She says she really wants to go and see what it is all about. Guess we will wait and see.

 

[dickhurtz]

no update?

 

[tjlove23]

no update?

I did another post. She played that night and twice since.

 

[hotwifelexy]

My wife has had solo dates multiple times and doesn't really like strangers. She has played without me there and probably will again. She wants to be friends first which is fine with me.

She has agreed to go to a club with me. We agreed it would be just seeing what it is about and not going home with anyone. I am starting to think she isn't as ready because she is raising some doubts and as not as excited as she was after we had an intense night of sex.

As excited about the possibly of seeing her find a couple, I do still love her and don't want it to be a bad experience. I feel I have to delete the swinger account We made and cancel our trip. She hasn't asked, but I want it feel right for her.

I just wish I could delete my desire to see her with someone else as easily as I delete the account at the club.

Get her on the champagne and coke