Protecting the primary relationnship is a factor of the STRENGTH of the primary relationship to begin with.......not how often we date our Lovers. How frequently we see our Lovers is going to be determined by US based on how intense that relationship becomes, not by some prearranged agreement with you. She won't want to be with you because its Tuesday and Thursday and that was the arrangement. Especially early on, we WANT to be with our new Lovers all the time. And honestly, if you stand in the way of her seeing him as often as she wants.......its VERY likely you will push her to him, or she'll just start cheating which is the WORST case scenrio.
Assuming he is aware you know about their relationship, it might be better if you let them move it in to the home (assuming life allows for this). My Lovers were NOT aware my husband knew, but I had the regularity of frequent business travel with them.
She is going to want to see him more often than not, he is the "new toy", the EXCITEMENT, and its just rational that we want to play with new things more than what we already have. Follow her lead, support her decisions, enjoy what she does versus complain about it, and share in her exceitment over this new lifestyle, and you will enjoy it as we have during our marriage. There WILL be hiccups..........holidays she wants to spend with him, weekends, cancelling preplaned events with you, and if you make it miserable it WILL BE miserable.
Don't believe the fanatic rantings here of non-participants who write fantasy stories about wives who have an On/Off switch that they flip at will and she does as they wish when they wish ONLY when they wish.....we don't work that way.
This can be a fun, happy, SEXCITING time of your lives IF you make it work for both of you. But if you believe the rantings of the average non-participant chronic masturbator, and probably INCEL, on here............you will destroy what can become a very fun part of your lives.
J (the wife)
