How NOT to bring up hotwifing/cuckolding to the wife...

[sub2femdom]

Hello all,

I don't have much to add on how to talk a wife into the lifestyle, but I can sure tell you how NOT to lol. So here's my failure of a story...

Me and the wife had been mildly kinky up to getting married, but then it stopped, she wasn't in the mood as often, and so things just got stale and eventually died. Not that I didn't try, but she seemed bored with it. I figured it was the lack of excitement. She knew I was into group sex and sharing, but that all seemed to fade after marriage also.

Around 2015 our bedroom was officially dead. She took me out for my birthday and I got a little tipsy, and of course, I just blurted out (on the drive home) all my crazy cuck fantasies, hotwife fantasies, etc.. She was horrified. After that, we didn't have sex for 5 years.

We're just starting to get back into sex again. She says she doesn't understand the fetishes and that it weirds her out. I guess I can understand that, I should have brought it up slowly, but with such infrequent sex (or sex talk), it's difficult to ease into it. I royally screwed up bringing it up, but I also realize that it didn't really matter anyways, it was never going to fly. But if I had a new woman, I would just bring it up on the first or second date, let her know I'm into kinky stuff, then let her explore and tell her as she asks.

Point is, don't just blurt it all out at once. Probably said a million times here already but I figured I'd highlight why.

 

[highwayman420]

Sorry man, My wife is not really horrified but rather just not interested in it at the moment. She loves roleplay though and got her some really nice bigger toys. You might slowly start with that.

 

[Mxfunguy]

Sorry man, My wife is not really horrified but rather just not interested in it at the moment. She loves roleplay though and got her some really nice bigger toys. You might slowly start with that.

Currently my situation as well she not saying no she’s just not sure, but where getting tous to roll play it maybe work into it

 

[Sgt Ray]

Gotta get those ladies out, get them a few drinks, maybe some music & dancing...and let them get hit on by guys who know their way around needy pussy. Have to change their tune, get them into a sexy mindset.

 

[Mxfunguy]

Gotta get those ladies out, get them a few drinks, maybe some music & dancing...and let them get hit on by guys who know their way around needy pussy. Have to change their tune, get them into a sexy mindset.

Trying we have a busy life style, and she’s very selfish conscious on her looks as well

 

[Sgt Ray]

You NEED to make time to experience & enjoy a good, healthy SEXUAL part of your lifestyle. You're making convenient excuses to not do so.
Stop the busy lifestyle bullshit. This is infinitely more importany.

As to your lady being self conscious. GET HER OUT to a nice bar/pub. Have a few drinks, get her to relax & enjoy herself. Have her wear something she looks good in AND is comfortable in. Make it a habit, every Saturday night? Get to know people. Go slow & easy, baby steps.

Watch xxx vids that interest her at home. Reinforce her innate attractiveness & body.
Eat her pussy as you watch xxx vids.

Accept the challange. She'll cum around slowly. Good luck.

 

[highwayman420]

You NEED to make time to experience & enjoy a good, healthy SEXUAL part of your lifestyle. You're making convenient excuses to not do so.
Stop the busy lifestyle bullshit. This is infinitely more importany.

As to your lady being self conscious. GET HER OUT to a nice bar/pub. Have a few drinks, get her to relax & enjoy herself. Have her wear something she looks good in AND is comfortable in. Make it a habit, every Saturday night? Get to know people. Go slow & easy, baby steps.

Watch xxx vids that interest her at home. Reinforce her innate attractiveness & body.
Eat her pussy as you watch xxx vids.

Accept the challange. She'll cum around slowly. Good luck.

Sound advice

 

[Mxfunguy]

My wife’s gives mixed signals won’t say yes or no. I’m averaged size I would say 6in decent girth, so I bought a realistic extender that’s thicker and 2inch longer to try with her and see her response

 

[Sgt Ray]

She needs to be interested, hot & turned on by the idea of Hotwifing & cuckold.
Not sure how an extender is gonna help.

Look, sometime, in face most times, the wife
is just not into it. You have to live with that.

 

[Mxfunguy]

I understand your that but idk if she is or not she’s not saying either way

 

[Sgt Ray]

Hmmm....playing coy/shy?

Get her to dress up nice & take her out to a bar, pub or club. Once she realizes she's attractive & men hit on her, she'll cime out of her shell.
Or, she won't. Not everyone is into this...

Just be easy, tread lightly.

 

[Mxfunguy]

Yea I’m trying to east if not then it’s not ment to do it

 

[Cumtogethernow]

I'm in the same boat. Wife is sexy AF (55 but looks 40), gets constant looks when we are out. Two summers ago we went down to Marco Island, FL. Had a great time. The beach always makes her horny. This trip was different. She constantly wanted to fuck, wore no panties/bras when we went out and couldn't get enough of me. It was glorious! We get home and it continues for 6 weeks straight. Wake up=fuck; mid day=fuck; after work=fuck; before bedtime=fuck and she decided to sleep in the nude. Sometimes waking up in the middle of the night to fuck. Sucking dick? Never her desire or strong suit. During this time though, she became a master of it! Deep throating me constantly and begging for me to cum on her face or down her throat. Decided she finally wanted to introduce toys. Went to a couple of local shops and found one for her. Then she decided she finally wanted anal. She came harder than she ever had and wanted it at least twice per week. She even asked me several times how hard my dick would be if I watched her with another guy... even if he had a bigger dick than mine. I let her know it would get me off so fast. Then she would think about it and tell me I was enough for her. She would still bring it up a few more times. After the 6 weeks, it all stopped. She can't explain it. Now when I try to bring any of it up she just plays it off or acts semi disgusted. She still uses the toy occasionally but has completely ruled out any form of anal. Forget about talking about another dick. Off limits now. When we DO have sex, it's good. But, it consist of me
My question... how do I get her back to that woman? I miss it and WE need it. All of it! HELP!!!!

 

[sub2femdom]

I'm in the same boat. Wife is sexy AF (55 but looks 40), gets constant looks when we are out. Two summers ago we went down to Marco Island, FL. Had a great time. The beach always makes her horny. This trip was different. She constantly wanted to fuck, wore no panties/bras when we went out and couldn't get enough of me. It was glorious! We get home and it continues for 6 weeks straight. Wake up=fuck; mid day=fuck; after work=fuck; before bedtime=fuck and she decided to sleep in the nude. Sometimes waking up in the middle of the night to fuck. Sucking dick? Never her desire or strong suit. During this time though, she became a master of it! Deep throating me constantly and begging for me to cum on her face or down her throat. Decided she finally wanted to introduce toys. Went to a couple of local shops and found one for her. Then she decided she finally wanted anal. She came harder than she ever had and wanted it at least twice per week. She even asked me several times how hard my dick would be if I watched her with another guy... even if he had a bigger dick than mine. I let her know it would get me off so fast. Then she would think about it and tell me I was enough for her. She would still bring it up a few more times. After the 6 weeks, it all stopped. She can't explain it. Now when I try to bring any of it up she just plays it off or acts semi disgusted. She still uses the toy occasionally but has completely ruled out any form of anal. Forget about talking about another dick. Off limits now. When we DO have sex, it's good. But, it consist of me
My question... how do I get her back to that woman? I miss it and WE need it. All of it! HELP!!!!

Seems like she just hit that point where the reality of what she was doing started setting in. She crossed lines, and broke boundaries that she had set for herself, and you happily obliged her. She's maybe questioning not only her own values, but yours as well. You should probably try to talk about it in a serious manner. It's not a bad thing that it turns you on and that you were willing to go with the flow, but maybe she thinks it's bad.

That's just one of a billion possibilities, but first thing that came to my mind

 

[NicaNica]

I'm in the same boat. Wife is sexy AF (55 but looks 40), gets constant looks when we are out. Two summers ago we went down to Marco Island, FL. Had a great time. The beach always makes her horny. This trip was different. She constantly wanted to fuck, wore no panties/bras when we went out and couldn't get enough of me. It was glorious! We get home and it continues for 6 weeks straight. Wake up=fuck; mid day=fuck; after work=fuck; before bedtime=fuck and she decided to sleep in the nude. Sometimes waking up in the middle of the night to fuck. Sucking dick? Never her desire or strong suit. During this time though, she became a master of it! Deep throating me constantly and begging for me to cum on her face or down her throat. Decided she finally wanted to introduce toys. Went to a couple of local shops and found one for her. Then she decided she finally wanted anal. She came harder than she ever had and wanted it at least twice per week. She even asked me several times how hard my dick would be if I watched her with another guy... even if he had a bigger dick than mine. I let her know it would get me off so fast. Then she would think about it and tell me I was enough for her. She would still bring it up a few more times. After the 6 weeks, it all stopped. She can't explain it. Now when I try to bring any of it up she just plays it off or acts semi disgusted. She still uses the toy occasionally but has completely ruled out any form of anal. Forget about talking about another dick. Off limits now. When we DO have sex, it's good. But, it consist of me
My question... how do I get her back to that woman? I miss it and WE need it. All of it!

Testosterone cream has helped me.

 

[dickhurtz]

Around 2015 our bedroom was officially dead. She took me out for my birthday and I got a little tipsy, and of course, I just blurted out (on the drive home) all my crazy cuck fantasies, hotwife fantasies, etc.. She was horrified. After that, we didn't have sex for 5 years.

are you saying that, you didn't have sex for 5 years as a punishment for telling her your fantasy?

 

[Mxfunguy]

are you saying that, you didn't have sex for 5 years as a punishment for telling her your fantasy?

I agree Seems a little harsh for communicating to her what you wanted

 

[sub2femdom]

are you saying that, you didn't have sex for 5 years as a punishment for telling her your fantasy?

It wasn't a punishment, it was just that our sex life was already pretty much dead, and that gave her a reason (excuse, reason, who knows?) to avoid sex even more. She was freaked out by it, more than I had anticipated, but at the same time in my own way it was something of a "hail Mary" attempt to stir her sexual desires because when we dated she was into a lot of kinks (so she claimed), but we didn't ever really explore them.

Looking back, I see how utterly stupid my 'confession' was. You can't have a healthy sex life in a relationship that lacks trust, open communications, honesty, and desire.

 

[Sgt Ray]

A misjudgement....we all make them.

Hang in there!

 

[dickhurtz]

It wasn't a punishment, it was just that our sex life was already pretty much dead, and that gave her a reason (excuse, reason, who knows?) to avoid sex even more. She was freaked out by it, more than I had anticipated, but at the same time in my own way it was something of a "hail Mary" attempt to stir her sexual desires because when we dated she was into a lot of kinks (so she claimed), but we didn't ever really explore them.

Looking back, I see how utterly stupid my 'confession' was. You can't have a healthy sex life in a relationship that lacks trust, open communications, honesty, and desire.

i have to tell you, in my experience sometimes a woman "doth protest too much".