I was curious if I can get an outside perspective on some recent events that I’m starting to think might mean my gf could be interested in a third. Let me know what you think.
For starters, my girlfriend and I are a fairly attractive couple and have been together for nearly 8 years. I’ve had an interest in sharing her for some time just due to the simple fact that I have no confidence issues and I’m 100% invested in ensuring she feels desired. We’ve never had any outside people in our relationship, so I thought I’d test the waters and see where’s she’s at without being pushy. It turns me on seeing her get turned on or feel desired. I’m also not a super jealous person, so after thinking about it for a while, I think it would be hot. I know the baby steps are essential. Wouldn’t try to push it.
So anyway:
•About a month ago, we were both talking about role plays and wanted to get creative. I randomly thought of one where I’d be her rebound. The role play would involve us “breaking up,” and then she would immediately text the ‘rebound’ right after. Id ‘go over’ , flirt, and then take her to the bedroom. She was turned on by it , which surprised me. She’s pretty conservative and I expected more of a pushback since it didn’t seem like something I’d expect her to get turned on by. I began thinking .
Fast-forward to last week. I decided to take the step and tell her that I thought it would be hot to see her with another man.
She was a little upset at first, but I realized it seemed more to do with “you just want another girl” as that’s all she would say or “you probably want that,” rather than a definite no. I told her it wasn’t about thinking of it so I can be with a girl and explained that it’s about her pleasure. She got a bit quiet about it and again deflected with “you probably want that.” I felt it was her way of saying yes, but she was afraid of what I’d rhink asked if she thought I was trapping her (due to her initial defensiveness) and she was quiet and just said “I don’t know.” No sorta outright shut down against it. Then I painted a more descriptive picture of how it would be and she sorta ignored it and was stuck on the “girl” part. I felt ignoring me being a bit more descriptive was guilt because maybe it turned her on.
I’m not gonna push it further out of respect for her and will stall for some time just because I don’t want to overwhelm her, but it seems like she has a secret turn on by it. At least based off these recent discussions.
Am I looking into this too deeply? What do you think?
For starters, my girlfriend and I are a fairly attractive couple and have been together for nearly 8 years. I’ve had an interest in sharing her for some time just due to the simple fact that I have no confidence issues and I’m 100% invested in ensuring she feels desired. We’ve never had any outside people in our relationship, so I thought I’d test the waters and see where’s she’s at without being pushy. It turns me on seeing her get turned on or feel desired. I’m also not a super jealous person, so after thinking about it for a while, I think it would be hot. I know the baby steps are essential. Wouldn’t try to push it.
So anyway:
•About a month ago, we were both talking about role plays and wanted to get creative. I randomly thought of one where I’d be her rebound. The role play would involve us “breaking up,” and then she would immediately text the ‘rebound’ right after. Id ‘go over’ , flirt, and then take her to the bedroom. She was turned on by it , which surprised me. She’s pretty conservative and I expected more of a pushback since it didn’t seem like something I’d expect her to get turned on by. I began thinking .
Fast-forward to last week. I decided to take the step and tell her that I thought it would be hot to see her with another man.
She was a little upset at first, but I realized it seemed more to do with “you just want another girl” as that’s all she would say or “you probably want that,” rather than a definite no. I told her it wasn’t about thinking of it so I can be with a girl and explained that it’s about her pleasure. She got a bit quiet about it and again deflected with “you probably want that.” I felt it was her way of saying yes, but she was afraid of what I’d rhink asked if she thought I was trapping her (due to her initial defensiveness) and she was quiet and just said “I don’t know.” No sorta outright shut down against it. Then I painted a more descriptive picture of how it would be and she sorta ignored it and was stuck on the “girl” part. I felt ignoring me being a bit more descriptive was guilt because maybe it turned her on.
I’m not gonna push it further out of respect for her and will stall for some time just because I don’t want to overwhelm her, but it seems like she has a secret turn on by it. At least based off these recent discussions.
Am I looking into this too deeply? What do you think?