Lost Confidence

[HubbyJohn]

How many of you cucks have lost all confidence having sex with your wife? We still enjoy making her cum with my mouth and toys, but as much as she still wants to have sex with me on occasion I try to avoid penetrating her. As enjoyable as it is for me, I can tell it is not for her. I know she likes the closeness we have together doing it and it isn't about the orgasm and that feels nice for our relationship and our bond, but as I fuck her I just start to think too much about how much more she reacts to the bigger dicks. I start to feel so pathetic and like she is simply pitying me and imagine that she just feels sorry for me as we fuck.

She tries to reassure me, but you know, my manhood is just shattered. It turns me on, I love that she happy and even the humiliation of it turns me on, but the angst can get overwhelming somtimes and sometimes I just miss having sex and feeling like a "man" even tho I know it's all social construct and the relationship we have is strong and great and fun and happy... but you know... it's hard...

 

[Cuckold husband]

That's exactly why we stopped. I'm trying to get my confidence back, but struggling to gain it again.

 

[Randr7896]

It has been the opposite experience for me. While I know that she does not enjoy my dick as much as she used to, mostly because her boyfriend has seemingly, permanently resized, I also know her body better than I ever have.
I like to think, other than her boyfriend, no one can give her pleasure like I can. It doesn't matter to me that it is with my mouth or a large dildo or using other toys.
I have more confidence than ever that I can pleasure her in ways I never could before.

 

[Ray Dachamp]

Man up already!
Its just what you wanted.
The Humiliation is in ur head.
You wanted her to enjoy other, bigger cocks.
Enjoy what YOU'VE done.

Does she have you licking her clean yet?

 

[drakebelg]

We are in the phase of looking for her first bull after i told her my cckold fantasy 18 months ago.

The coversations in the weeks and months after that have led to my PE getting worse and me having very little sexual confidence. She would love to fuck other guys becuase she finds me too submissive in bed, I have always been too quick and in general an averagish lover. She misses the sex gods she experienced before me. We've had open conversations about how not everyone can be a great lover same as not everyone can be a formula one driver.

I've accepted my place as a poor sex partner but try to please her in other ways. I'm much happier when she has me locked and denied long term and get to please her with a strapon and daily footrubs. She is also much happier in that scenario. It's a bit strange and tough though that it comes and goes. She unlocked me 3 weeks ago (after 5 weeks denied), made me orgasm and since then she hasn't mention chastity, cuckolding or anything......

 

[Ray Dachamp]

It's just what u wanted her to be.

Next she has u lick her pussy or tits clean of her bulls cum.

Then, eventually, she'll have u clean his cock off....maybe even make him hard to fuck her again. Its what u need & u know it. She does.

 

[Loridan]

We get with a guy friend pretty regularly. We are late 50s, he's 35. He's a really cool guy, he's clean, polite, has a good job, divorced. He has a bigger tool than I do.
My wife easily gets off from oral from me or her vibrator. Our sex life was/is good. She had never had an orgasm while we were fucking.
We've been getting with our friend semi regularly for about 2 years.
She's cum many times with him while he fucks her. When he's with us there's been times she cums while I'm doing her but only after she got off with him first.
I'm good with everything that happens.
Our fun with him has improved our sex life like crazy. She's horny as fuck for days after he's been with us so we have a lot of real good sex.
She very obviously likes sex with him but she's always ready for me too. Nothing cuckold at all.
I have no problem with my confidence. Our marriage is good.
Our fun with our friend only adds to our sex lives.

 

[Ray Dachamp]

Absofuckinlutely perfect!

 

[Bull4Oldrwives]

I have found that 'sloppy seconds' is great for this problem, Assuming she has decided that she wants to allow him access to her. I typically have encounters where it is just she and I. Then there are encounters where he will participate doing fluffing, guide me into her, cleanup which will all get him pretty aroused then he is allowed to enjoy her wet, warm, swollen pussy. The excitement of entering her wet swollen love nest typically resolves the hardness issue and it will only require 2-3 thrusts for him to cum pretty intensely.
This only happens after I am completely finished and I will often leave the room telling him that I have gotten her ready for him. This is the the kind of situation where an experienced Bull who is sensitive to the cucks issue can help him have orgasms. If the wife wants his cuckold experience to involve limited continued pleasure with her I want to help make that happen.
I prefer LTRs where I essentially become part of the marriage and part of my responsibility is to bring all the pleasure, excitement, and romance for her that makes the marital triad such a unique lifestyle.

 

[cuck52]

How many of you cucks have lost all confidence having sex with your wife? We still enjoy making her cum with my mouth and toys, but as much as she still wants to have sex with me on occasion I try to avoid penetrating her. As enjoyable as it is for me, I can tell it is not for her. I know she likes the closeness we have together doing it and it isn't about the orgasm and that feels nice for our relationship and our bond, but as I fuck her I just start to think too much about how much more she reacts to the bigger dicks. I start to feel so pathetic and like she is simply pitying me and imagine that she just feels sorry for me as we fuck.

She tries to reassure me, but you know, my manhood is just shattered. It turns me on, I love that she happy and even the humiliation of it turns me on, but the angst can get overwhelming somtimes and sometimes I just miss having sex and feeling like a "man" even tho I know it's all social construct and the relationship we have is strong and great and fun and happy... but you know... it's hard...

Good

 

[Bigcreampie94]

How many of you cucks have lost all confidence having sex with your wife? We still enjoy making her cum with my mouth and toys, but as much as she still wants to have sex with me on occasion I try to avoid penetrating her. As enjoyable as it is for me, I can tell it is not for her. I know she likes the closeness we have together doing it and it isn't about the orgasm and that feels nice for our relationship and our bond, but as I fuck her I just start to think too much about how much more she reacts to the bigger dicks. I start to feel so pathetic and like she is simply pitying me and imagine that she just feels sorry for me as we fuck.

She tries to reassure me, but you know, my manhood is just shattered. It turns me on, I love that she happy and even the humiliation of it turns me on, but the angst can get overwhelming somtimes and sometimes I just miss having sex and feeling like a "man" even tho I know it's all social construct and the relationship we have is strong and great and fun and happy... but you know... it's hard...

Bro let me tell you it's not necessarily your size that excites her. That reaction 🫨🫨 could be the idea behind it. Your watching it's tabo dark secret. I'm 7.5 not the biggest not the smartest and I was fucking this dudes girl and bro was like 10 maybe 11.5 and I made her scream and she didn't react to him no where like me. This is also why I tell new people before you ever do it now but will you be ok 20 times from now.

 

[coastalkid]

How many of you cucks have lost all confidence having sex with your wife? We still enjoy making her cum with my mouth and toys, but as much as she still wants to have sex with me on occasion I try to avoid penetrating her. As enjoyable as it is for me, I can tell it is not for her. I know she likes the closeness we have together doing it and it isn't about the orgasm and that feels nice for our relationship and our bond, but as I fuck her I just start to think too much about how much more she reacts to the bigger dicks. I start to feel so pathetic and like she is simply pitying me and imagine that she just feels sorry for me as we fuck.

She tries to reassure me, but you know, my manhood is just shattered. It turns me on, I love that she happy and even the humiliation of it turns me on, but the angst can get overwhelming somtimes and sometimes I just miss having sex and feeling like a "man" even tho I know it's all social construct and the relationship we have is strong and great and fun and happy... but you know... it's hard...

Even though I'm not a cuck I understand losing your confidence. Years of vanilla sex and having a wife that just isn't into sex has destroyed my confidence. Ultimately, I was unable to get hard for her and it crushed me because all I've ever wanted was a satisfying sex life. It took my breaking down for my wife to recognize that our sex lives were not an individual thing, our happiness is built upon each other.

Fortunately, my wife could not stand seeing me broken. She saw her part in the result. She realized her attitude toward sex was the result of her own self image. She feels unattractive because of her weight and age. She knows I love her and I accept her just as she is, but that is conditioned by her expectation for me to say that because I'm her husband.

To her credit she has made a conscious effort to be more engaged, more willing to talk dirty to me to break out of the vanilla death spiral we had been in for SO long. It has made a big difference and my confidence is returning although tempered by my age.

I agree with you regarding the notion of the "social construct" of feeling like a real man. You can outwardly admit that is nothing more than that but on the inside it is always a thought in the back of your mind. Personally, I've chosen to remain true to my desire. I've always felt like I haven't fucked as much as I want to. I always tell myself no one says on their dying bed, "I wish I had spent less time fucking!"

You're fortunate that you have a wife that wants to have sex with you. I'd say let her help you work your way back to being confident. Your task is to try hard to ignore your thoughts about whether you satisfy her like you believe the big cocks do. Clearly it makes her happy to please you. She gets a satisfaction from doing so. Let that replace your thoughts when you have sex with your wife. Don't deny her the complete happiness she could have by knowing she makes her husband happy.

Many people here will tell you to just accept it, this is your life and role now. THEY AREN'T YOU! If that works for THEM, more power to them! You don't have to accept ......! I say, fight with all your heart and soul for what makes you happy and NO one knows what that is better than you!

 

[FunTimesCpl]

How many of you cucks have lost all confidence having sex with your wife? We still enjoy making her cum with my mouth and toys, but as much as she still wants to have sex with me on occasion I try to avoid penetrating her. As enjoyable as it is for me, I can tell it is not for her. I know she likes the closeness we have together doing it and it isn't about the orgasm and that feels nice for our relationship and our bond, but as I fuck her I just start to think too much about how much more she reacts to the bigger dicks. I start to feel so pathetic and like she is simply pitying me and imagine that she just feels sorry for me as we fuck.

She tries to reassure me, but you know, my manhood is just shattered. It turns me on, I love that she happy and even the humiliation of it turns me on, but the angst can get overwhelming somtimes and sometimes I just miss having sex and feeling like a "man" even tho I know it's all social construct and the relationship we have is strong and great and fun and happy... but you know... it's hard...

Believe me, I understand how you feel but I know her bulls satisfy her huge cock needs and I do luv seeing her scream like a banshee when she cums all over their huge hung cocks.

Nowadays, I either I start her off with my cock to spread her and get her wet so her huge cock bulls can fully spread her with their hung cocks or I'll pump her afterwards to feel the cum lube inside her.

 

[drakebelg]

Even though I'm not a cuck I understand losing your confidence. Years of vanilla sex and having a wife that just isn't into sex has destroyed my confidence. Ultimately, I was unable to get hard for her and it crushed me because all I've ever wanted was a satisfying sex life. It took my breaking down for my wife to recognize that our sex lives were not an individual thing, our happiness is built upon each other.

Fortunately, my wife could not stand seeing me broken. She saw her part in the result. She realized her attitude toward sex was the result of her own self image. She feels unattractive because of her weight and age. She knows I love her and I accept her just as she is, but that is conditioned by her expectation for me to say that because I'm her husband.

To her credit she has made a conscious effort to be more engaged, more willing to talk dirty to me to break out of the vanilla death spiral we had been in for SO long. It has made a big difference and my confidence is returning although tempered by my age.

I agree with you regarding the notion of the "social construct" of feeling like a real man. You can outwardly admit that is nothing more than that but on the inside it is always a thought in the back of your mind. Personally, I've chosen to remain true to my desire. I've always felt like I haven't fucked as much as I want to. I always tell myself no one says on their dying bed, "I wish I had spent less time fucking!"

You're fortunate that you have a wife that wants to have sex with you. I'd say let her help you work your way back to being confident. Your task is to try hard to ignore your thoughts about whether you satisfy her like you believe the big cocks do. Clearly it makes her happy to please you. She gets a satisfaction from doing so. Let that replace your thoughts when you have sex with your wife. Don't deny her the complete happiness she could have by knowing she makes her husband happy.

Many people here will tell you to just accept it, this is your life and role now. THEY AREN'T YOU! If that works for THEM, more power to them! You don't have to accept ......! I say, fight with all your heart and soul for what makes you happy and NO one knows what that is better than you!

This is a great response and also hits home for me. We f54, m50 are still in the "seriously considering it phase". I also sometimes feel sad on how we got to this place (lack of sexual confidence, worse PE, wife seeing me as a submissive in bed) due to her lack of interest for decades, me running after her not feeling desired. I'm currently struggling between enjoying the humiliation (caging, denial, severe PE, cuckold fantasies, reverse pegging, penis sleeves), but also looking for my sexual confidence. It's something we've just started talking about this week. Eventhough i've severe PE, but with penis sleeves and lidocaine cream I can still give her a proper fucking. We are looking for our path between the FLR/sub/dom and making sure we are both truly happy and feeling good about ourselves.

 

[coastalkid]

This is a great response and also hits home for me. We f54, m50 are still in the "seriously considering it phase". I also sometimes feel sad on how we got to this place (lack of sexual confidence, worse PE, wife seeing me as a submissive in bed) due to her lack of interest for decades, me running after her not feeling desired. I'm currently struggling between enjoying the humiliation (caging, denial, severe PE, cuckold fantasies, reverse pegging, penis sleeves), but also looking for my sexual confidence. It's something we've just started talking about this week. Eventhough i've severe PE, but with penis sleeves and lidocaine cream I can still give her a proper fucking. We are looking for our path between the FLR/sub/dom and making sure we are both truly happy and feeling good about ourselves.

Thank you for the kind word on my post. I've always wanted an exciting sex life. I've learned over the years of being on this site and another more about what I DON'T want than what I do. I ran into the "Three Horsemen of the Sexual Apocalypse" during the course of our marriage, a conservative religious upbringing (of my wife), postpartum depression and menopause. They came in waves, one after the other.

My wife has finally understood what the collateral damage has been for me. She's finally in a place that she enjoys sex. She never says no to sex now. The downside is her witnessing my frustration when I fail to get hard for her despite both our best efforts. She has always known I want to fuck. She knows I'm always thinking about sex and sexual things and for that not to be so something is off. Sadly between the conditioning effect of those "horsemen" and age where the mind is eager the body isn't always in sync.

The real difference, and the hope connected to that, is that she's acknowledged her part in where I am and she's committed herself to salvaging the time we have left. I've made it a point to stay positive and fight off the negative. My confidence is returning. I just wish it hadn't taken so damn long!

If I were to share any advice it would be to make this part of your post, "......and making sure we are both truly happy and feeling good about ourselves.", your number one priority. Any of the other kinks or situations you desire will ultimately fail or become undesired if your aren't happy and feeling good about yourself.

 

[Lovefeet]

It's just what u wanted her to be.

Next she has u lick her pussy or tits clean of her bulls cum.

Then, eventually, she'll have u clean his cock off....maybe even make him hard to fuck her again. Its what u need & u know it. She does.

Not every one is homo