Questions about swinger parties

[Loridan]

Wife and I enjoy semi regular fun with a guy we know. I'd say we share her, it's not cuckold at all. We're very comfy together. Nothing weird happens but nothing is off limits.
Wife and I have talked about what a swinger party might be like. We live in a huge city, we have looked up the places but none have any good reviews.
We've looked on sls, there's several private homes that host anywhere from 10 minutes from where we live to a 90 minute drive.
Our biggest fear, what if we see someone we know?
The club type places, reviews all say, places are rundown, dirty, too many single men. True? Not true?
A house party...how many people? Couples? Men?
DONT BE OFFENDED...WE'RE JUST ASKING...overweight people? Older? Younger?
We are mid 50s, I'm 6ft, could loose 15 lbs, wife is 5' 6", side 8, very good looking, rock solid body.
We'd be looking to meet men, good looking, classy men. Age not that important. We're not into black but you never know.
Our/her fantasy(?)...hook up with two or even three guys, one at a time, privately but with me present and watching.
We'd also be into watching a good looking wife have sex with a younger guy and her husband.
House party...do people have sex in the livingroom type area with others watching? I'm guessing a bedroom would be private?

 

[jw_kk]

Lifestyle / swinger venues and groups are all over the map in pretty much every regard. Some of it depends on where you live, local law enforcement tolerances, etc. about what can happen in on-premise clubs. Most are sketchy in our experience. Many of the on-premise clubs screen in general, some cater to older/mature couples, some to younger - most limit the number of single men by various means. Those that screen single men tend to have "hotter" guys.

Private parties are varied as well. Many swinger / lifestyle couples are sort of closed groups, couples who know one another very well, and get together regularly for sex. In most of these circles, it's a huge plus if your female partner/wife is bisexual, not so much true for the guys. There are groups that host open-by-invitation house parties too.

Most of the time, these events are oriented toward mutual/reciprocal sex - in my case, KK's not a fan of me fucking other women, and the events don't usually cater to couples in hot wife / cuckold situations - think lots of partner swapping, bi/lesbian stuff often, and same-room sex. Every once in a while there'll be a host / venue with a private room, for those who are inexperienced, shy or otherwise reluctant to have a large audience.

Swinger events aren't the best for gang bang sex, at least in our experience, but it can and does happen.

 

[WNY3somecple]

The thing about the fear of seeing someone you know.....what's the worry? They are there just like you.

 

[wifestoy]

We were at a house party once. Someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned to see one of our local judges standing there. He laughed and said.....we didn't see each other here did we.....

 

[hotratz]

We were at a house party once. Someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned to see one of our local judges standing there. He laughed and said.....we didn't see each other here did we.....

Not exactly at a swinger party, but in the nude pool at Hedo2. Woman asks - "love your accent, where are you from". So, I tell her. Then she asks what do I do, so I tell her the family business type, but not name, to which she replies "such & such business"? - ah, well, yes, I say. Then she replies "I've known you Mom and Dad for years, don't tell them you saw me here"...

 

[MYN4KIX]

Most clubs especially chains with multiple locations like Colette’s you will find upscale and maintain a respectful demeanor.

 

[SWSEXYDUO]

Wife and I enjoy semi regular fun with a guy we know. I'd say we share her, it's not cuckold at all. We're very comfy together. Nothing weird happens but nothing is off limits.
Wife and I have talked about what a swinger party might be like. We live in a huge city, we have looked up the places but none have any good reviews.
We've looked on sls, there's several private homes that host anywhere from 10 minutes from where we live to a 90 minute drive.
Our biggest fear, what if we see someone we know?
The club type places, reviews all say, places are rundown, dirty, too many single men. True? Not true?
A house party...how many people? Couples? Men?
DONT BE OFFENDED...WE'RE JUST ASKING...overweight people? Older? Younger?
We are mid 50s, I'm 6ft, could loose 15 lbs, wife is 5' 6", side 8, very good looking, rock solid body.
We'd be looking to meet men, good looking, classy men. Age not that important. We're not into black but you never know.
Our/her fantasy(?)...hook up with two or even three guys, one at a time, privately but with me present and watching.
We'd also be into watching a good looking wife have sex with a younger guy and her husband.
House party...do people have sex in the livingroom type area with others watching? I'm guessing a bedroom would be private?

Parties are usually social, absolutely no pressure, may be public play or bedrooms. Clubs are usually pretty regulated by health department. There again is no pressure. Both very private and public playrooms. Sometimes a dungeon. Single guys are around, but usually not too many. Typically regulated by the organizers. Single guys are always well behaved or they will be gone.

 

[WNY3somecple]

Parties are usually social, absolutely no pressure, may be public play or bedrooms. Clubs are usually pretty regulated by health department. There again is no pressure. Both very private and public playrooms. Sometimes a dungeon. Single guys are around, but usually not too many. Typically regulated by the organizers. Single guys are always well behaved or they will be gone.

We have also been to two hotel take overs and two campground take overs.

Hotel, only booked people through the several swing groups that set up the event. Obviously some rules about where nudity was ok or how much, obviously most sex play should be in a room. Outdoor pool, huge privacy screen erected to keep prying eyes away. Mostly couples, select single males. Parties each night in large event hall at hotel.

Campground takeover was a lot more open. Privately owned, owners were in the lifestyle. Took place in the fall after busy season (northeast US). Most of the staff were already gone for the season or given the 5 days off, so volunteers from the participants helped do things like garbage collection, bathroom cleaning. Rules....no sex in the pool or shared buildings (rec hall). Clothing never required anyplace. No sex in the bathrooms/showers (I know one lady who broke that rule in the men's shower lol). Clean up your camp site, everyday.

 

[Mister_De_Sade]

As some have said above, it's going to vary wildly from place to place, and even from event to event.

My gal and I have been to one Swingers club and it was a semi-success. Luckily we went with another guy that had been part of a MFM threesome with us in the past, bc most of the guys there were waaaay older and not in very good shape. Luckily my gal didn't mind an audience, nor getting her tits cummed on by a couple of strangers watching us play with her in the back room. So it was a net win in my book!

 

[clem99]

The thing about the fear of seeing someone you know.....what's the worry? They are there just like you.

In a way, I think that would be a bonus. Now you have a friend to play with

 

[Little_devil]

As others have said, it really depends. We have attended a lot of house parties and found all shapes and sizes. Some have skewed older and some younger, but there was always a mix. I have been to a house party where there were only about 4 to 6 couples and a few single guys, not as much fun, and I have been to huge house parties. We prefer somewhere in the middle. Most have had single guys though and you could very likely find someone to fulfill your interest. We have been to parties where you can find sexy action anywhere in the house and a couple with rules on where you can play. My advice is to reach out to the host if you can and ask. I am sure they would give you an idea of what to expect. I would also advise not to go with a mission of making something happen. Go and check it out and meet people. If it happens, great. If not, maybe make some friends and network. We don't always play with others at house parties and never expect it. It's nice when it happens. Just don't be shy. I think we went to at least two parties before we started to hook up with others. It's not uncommon at parties or clubs.

We were invited to a "selective" house party once where the invites were only given to certain types of people. It was mostly younger and fit couples or who the host considered attractive I guess. It was ok but probably our least favorite party we have attended.

We have been to several clubs as well and attend one regularly. They also can be older one night and younger another night but we always found a pretty good mix. You will also find all shapes, sizes, colors, and desires on any given night. There is probably a wider variety at a club then at a party. The clubs we have gone to are pretty clean but I am sure it can depend on the club. What is important to me is that the playrooms are clean. We have almost always found everyone very welcoming though. Same advice as going to a house party. Don't go with a mission of having sex. Be engaging, mingle, and get to know some people. We have had some great hook ups at the club but a few times when there wasn't a match, my wife and I used a playroom for ourselves. Still a win.

The clubs that we attend have a policy of only allowing sponsored single men in, meaning he had to come with a couple, and they limit the number each night. It doesn't mean they only play with their sponsor couple but it helps screen them. We have found there was always enough single guys to have a good chance of hooking up, and that is what my wife and I often look for now a days, MFM's. I like to watch her with another guy but I participate also. We are not a cuckold couple.

One of the hardest things some deal with is being turned down. It's tough, but remember, everyone has different tastes. Keep engaging and I am sure you will find someone who clicks.

We have run into some pushy people in both settings. Usually a firm "thanks, but no thanks" and walk away works. Worst case you can always report it to the host or club and they will deal with it. We haven't had to go that far and pushy folks haven't happened often.

I am sure there are terrible clubs and house parties out there. But this has been our experiences in the 10 years we have been in the lifestyle. Don't be afraid to give it a try. If it doesn't work out, you will have something to talk about. Just be open minded and have fun.

 

[Sensualmanva]

You can not program your desires or responses in any true swinger's setting, whether it be a house party or a club or a resort. You just have to wade in and take what is there; be a voyeur or be a participant. But what you can't do (you can but you'll be disappointed) is say "I want to go to this type of place with this type of people and meet this type of person and do these things." It's the ultimate 'go with the flow' scene. Sometimes it's fun and works out and other times you end of watching or dancing with your partner.

 

[Ht805cpl]

Almost everything that can be said about clubs, parties and private get togethers has been said, they all vary to some degree, and if you look hard enough you will find the one you enjoy. There will always be the time you don't feel comfortable or don't like the environment, the easy thing to do is leave. We prefer parties to clubs, but they are very similar, most have both private play areas and open play areas or areas where others can watch. The most important thing is at any place we have ever been the general rule of ask first and NO means NO. With those two rules in place, you can pick and choose whomever you feel comfortable with. My lady loves to gang bang, but not everyone so she will mingle and pick out several men she is interested in and invite them to a play area, public or private don't really matter much to us, and I usually am around to monitor for her safety and play when the time is right. Trial and error is the only way you will find the type of club you are comfortable at. Good Luck.