We were on a break!

I think your problem isn't the sex you had during your 'intermission', it's the lie you told afterwards. This LS is built on honesty especially in protecting the primary relationship and the lie is one very big strike that you'll need to overcome beforehand. The advice that it is best from you rather than hearsay is very valid, don't wait if you had that much action time is not on your side.
 
After the first time, I was really scared. I didn't want to continue! Then my wife sat me down and told me she really likes this lifestyle and she will never stop. I was very jealous for a while, but when I saw that he loved me and would stay by my side forever, I calmed down and I didn’t want to she have sex only with me. I think your husband would understand your desires too.
 
How important is it to get your husband back? What if your husband doesn't go along? Will you accept a vanilla relationship to be a married couple again?
 
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I understand completely your initial denial when you reunited with your husband. Probably a good idea if you guys were still shaky in the relationship and you are concerned about husband’s reaction. The guy who castigated you for lying is clueless. BUT you love the new sexual you, it is your life, and if you want to be free tell your husband now. Everything . No holds barred. Take control of your sex life , even if your husband is not on board. He does not own you or your sexuality.
 
If he asks, I suggest you treat it like ripping a bandaid off. Be up front with him.
If he asks if you liked it, tell him the truth. If he asks if his cock was thicker, longer, whatever, tell him. If he asks if he knew how to use it, tell him yes if he was a skilled lover.
Unless you had an agreement to be celibate while you were separated, should not apologize for what happened.
If he has a problem with it, ask if he had any encounters while you two were apart. See where the conversation goes from there.
I am nervous of his reaction and that he won’t be willing to accept that I openly explored my sexuality. I had some huge dicks and a lot of very skilled lovers and I think that will be very intimidating for him to hear.
 
After the first time, I was really scared. I didn't want to continue! Then my wife sat me down and told me she really likes this lifestyle and she will never stop. I was very jealous for a while, but when I saw that he loved me and would stay by my side forever, I calmed down and I didn’t want to she have sex only with me. I think your husband would understand your desires too.
I am getting so much good advise from men that enjoy lifestyle and it would be amazing if he was one of those men. I guess I just don’t know how to handle it if he isn’t and he rejects me for the fun I had outside of marriage.
 
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I understand completely your initial denial when you reunited with your husband. Probably a good idea if you guys were still shaky in the relationship and you are concerned about husband’s reaction. The guy who castigated you for lying is clueless. BUT you love the new sexual you, it is your life, and if you want to be free tell your husband now. Everything . No holds barred. Take control of your sex life , even if your husband is not on board. He does not own you or your sexuality.
This break opened up an entirely new part of my sexuality and it is something that I crave now but am not able to embrace.
 
I am getting so much good advise from men that enjoy lifestyle and it would be amazing if he was one of those men. I guess I just don’t know how to handle it if he isn’t and he rejects me for the fun I had outside of marriage.
It will be hard to live without your desires.
 
I am nervous of his reaction and that he won’t be willing to accept that I openly explored my sexuality. I had some huge dicks and a lot of very skilled lovers and I think that will be very intimidating for him to hear.
It may be that it is difficult to hear. But if he hears it, it is best to come from you.
You were separated. If you want the relationship to thrive, do so from the point of truth.
He may have a hard time with it. If he does, keep communicating! He might need some time to process it.
 
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So you are miserable living without the sex you crave , and are miserable loving with your possibly judgmental husband because ….? Because you think he will dump you ? I do not see what you have to lose by telling him about your experiences and what you need going forward. If husband says “…whoa , not with me…” then you know where you stand and can either say yes or no to his position. You can say “…I’m just telling you how things will be. Not your call.” Or you can say “…I love you - I’ll do it your way”. Or you can say good-bye. . If husband says “…sign me up” then you got the brass ring. But if you do nothing you will be miserable in your marriage for the rest of your life. Guaranteed . I wish I had followed by own advice😩
 
KimmieKim,

There are different ways to get from where you are to where you would like to be. Telling your husband you were a fucktoy while you were separated is a gamble in my mind. If you were going to do that, I would have done it right away.

Since time has passed, I would suggest opening the topic differently. Not sure if you are an avid reader or not, but my wife has opened conversations by telling me about a book she has read that contained some kinky stuff. She can then ask what I think about stuff and better gage where I am comfortable and where I am not. This is always risk free because she can be vague about whether this turns her on or not as we discuss scenarios. Please note that our evolution to stag/hotwife took several years of conversation before she let another man slide inside of her knowing she had my approval.

Now... If I had to guess, my wife had extramarital affairs prior to our open arrangement. While I would love to hear how she played with others, I do not expect she will ever share for the same fears as you have. She does not want to harm our relationship in any way.

If you are able to open the door moving forward to play with others, the past just becomes water under the bridge. Commit to be honest with your husband about your wants and needs moving forward and listen to him about his wants and needs. They may be much closer than you ever imagined possible. Or, you may have different needs.

Best of luck!
 
When my wife and I were on a break we both were anything but faithful. I bounced between 2 girls I knew. She (i found out later) was in a dating site. She'd hooked up with quite a few guys and had a couple pregnancy scares. That doesn't bother me at all. I actually found it to be a turn on knowing random guys were cumming in her.
 
This break opened up an entirely new part of my sexuality and it is something that I crave now but am not able to embrace.
The question is, can you really handle not having all the cocks you crave ever again? Once Pandora's box gets opened, you can't shut it.
 
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I don't think that the problem is what you did while you were separated - you weren't together after all so you were free to do as you liked.
The real problem is how do you go back to regular sex when you've been used to wild, exciting sex - esp the being shared around, which I also love.
I think you really do need to be able to share with your husband what you enjoyed while you were separated with a hope of incorporating it into your sex life together. Otherwise you're going to miss the exciting sex and you'll end up getting it elsewhere anyway xx
So true. When we got back together she continued seeing other guys and I pretend not to notice.
 
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In the now relatively distant past, KK and I agreed to mutual trial separation - a situation driven by complex circumstances. I moved into an apartment in a nearby city, shared with my affair partner.

KK and I were living separately for about ten months, a tumultuous time for everyone involved. In that interval, I was monogamous with my affair partner, and did not engage in sex with KK. Circumstances demanded however that from time to time, KK and I had to appear in various social and professional events together, so we were in contact.

It was a dark time emotionally, as I suspected KK was dating, possibly having sex with other men, or conducting an affair. Even though I was living with, and enjoying frequent sex with my affair partner, I was still twinged by jealousy, and continuously fantasized that KK was fucking other men.

There were rumors, innuendo, things I’d observe at functions where KK was present that reinforced my belief that KK was engaging in encounters with other men - those details are unimportant, save to say the jealousy and slightly humiliating innuendo from some about what KK was up to during our separation is memorable to this very day.

Toward the end of that separation, KK and I experienced a triggering event that led to reconciliation. I ended things with my affair partner, returned home, and we began the process of trying to repair the damage done.

It took twenty years before KK confessed the events of that dark time to me. As it turns out, a combination of sexual needs, revenge/retribution, and her desire to explore led KK to date, and fuck three different men during our separation, in addition to a couple of drunken one-night stands. KK admitted to fucking, sucking and other lurid acts with five different men in total, two of them complete strangers. Her confession was spread out over two “main events,” one posed as fantasy during a pillow-talk session, KK’s means of testing the waters as to my response, the second a confession blending truth-or-dare elements that spanned three nights. Those were some of the most intense orgasms I’ve ever experienced. Hearing her recount the juicy details was sensational.

You should consider teasing, tormenting or titillating your husband with the details, even if you just pose it as fantasy during intimacy with him. See how he reacts. You never know - he could be more open to it than you ever imagine.
i don't think i have ever heard the term "affair partner" before.
 
Thanks for your input again! I absolutely loved being a fuck toy and my dream would be to get my husband to support it. I got so used to taking multiple dicks that after being fucked by just one I am still so horny wanting more. I will have to find a way to introduce the idea to him so I can enjoy myself again. You are right about him possibly finding out. There are now a lot of guys out there who have fucked me and it’s possible he will run into one eventually.
if i may ask, how long have you been married, any kids? depending on circumstances, ity might be good to tell all & take your chances. also, curious why separation happened: financial, abuse, infidelity etc?
 
So the title is kind of joke but it’s the truth of my situation. My husband and I were separated for about 8 months and during that time I was anything but faithful. I got involved with another guy shortly after we decided to separate and the sex with him was amazing. He took control almost immediately and after that, I was basically there to please him. We did some absolutely wild stuff together and he opened my eyes to so many sexual experiences. The other things is, it wasn’t just sex with him. He loved to share me around to anyone else he could find. It was just a crazy, wild sex filled adventure.

The real issue is, this is not something that I could ever tell my husband.
Ok, we are all listening now, what kind of crazy sexy and sharing- please, spare no details lol. 🍆😋😉💦