Hi, I’d like your thoughts on something that has been slowly unfolding between my wife and me.
At the beginning, whenever I asked her about her fantasies, she would say that she didn’t really know. Over time, however, she began to open up. One day, she admitted that the idea of having sex on a beach appealed to her. From there, I gently introduced the possibility of being seen by others, and to my surprise, she said she wouldn’t care.
As time went on, these fantasies gradually evolved. When I mentioned that people might see her naked, she told me to let them see. Later, I suggested that they might want to touch her. A few days afterward, during a moment of intense arousal, she said they could. Even then, she remained shy and hesitant, and afterward she often seemed unsure about what she had said.
After another sexual encounter, when her arousal was again very strong, she repeated that others could touch her, and even lick her. From that point on, our shared fantasies began to revolve around being seen and desired in public or group situations, but always strictly within imagination.
More recently, still only in fantasy, she expressed a desire for multiple men at the same time, with different body types. She also liked the idea of people watching her and masturbating while waiting their turn. All of this exists only during moments of heightened sexual excitement and has never gone beyond fantasy.
In everyday life, however, she appears rather indifferent to exhibitionism and does not actively seek attention. Coming from conservative backgrounds, shaped by religion and culture, she also struggles with confidence in her body. I told her I was comfortable with her wearing more revealing clothes, but she did not feel fully at ease with that.
While on vacation in Europe, she wore a moderately revealing bikini, enjoyed it, and began going to nearby restaurants dressed that way. She also started going out without wearing a bra. Seeing this made me feel that she might be comfortable going topless on a European beach, especially since she already enjoys being seen in a bikini in public places.
More recently, during sex, and once again only as a fantasy, she mentioned the idea of another man giving her a massage and having sex with her. Everything described remains strictly in the realm of fantasy.
All of this leaves me wondering what it means and how to understand what is happening.
What do you think?
At the beginning, whenever I asked her about her fantasies, she would say that she didn’t really know. Over time, however, she began to open up. One day, she admitted that the idea of having sex on a beach appealed to her. From there, I gently introduced the possibility of being seen by others, and to my surprise, she said she wouldn’t care.
As time went on, these fantasies gradually evolved. When I mentioned that people might see her naked, she told me to let them see. Later, I suggested that they might want to touch her. A few days afterward, during a moment of intense arousal, she said they could. Even then, she remained shy and hesitant, and afterward she often seemed unsure about what she had said.
After another sexual encounter, when her arousal was again very strong, she repeated that others could touch her, and even lick her. From that point on, our shared fantasies began to revolve around being seen and desired in public or group situations, but always strictly within imagination.
More recently, still only in fantasy, she expressed a desire for multiple men at the same time, with different body types. She also liked the idea of people watching her and masturbating while waiting their turn. All of this exists only during moments of heightened sexual excitement and has never gone beyond fantasy.
In everyday life, however, she appears rather indifferent to exhibitionism and does not actively seek attention. Coming from conservative backgrounds, shaped by religion and culture, she also struggles with confidence in her body. I told her I was comfortable with her wearing more revealing clothes, but she did not feel fully at ease with that.
While on vacation in Europe, she wore a moderately revealing bikini, enjoyed it, and began going to nearby restaurants dressed that way. She also started going out without wearing a bra. Seeing this made me feel that she might be comfortable going topless on a European beach, especially since she already enjoys being seen in a bikini in public places.
More recently, during sex, and once again only as a fantasy, she mentioned the idea of another man giving her a massage and having sex with her. Everything described remains strictly in the realm of fantasy.
All of this leaves me wondering what it means and how to understand what is happening.
What do you think?
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