Making a Hotwife!

[coastalkid]

Just checking in you! Any updates?

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

Life has gotten very busy and fun times have pretty much stopped completely. My wife hasn’t played with anyone other than me since early November and has only met her regular fuck buddy twice since the end of September. I think he and I are both equally frustrated with the lack of action. Though, my wife and I generally find time to fuck about once a week.

I have tried to find the “on” button for my wife as I certainly miss her kinky side. She has been very busy with work and normal life. I suppose one good change is that she has lost over 25 lbs over the past few months and is definitely looking fantastic. Whenever the time comes where she wants more attention, there will be a long line of men interested in enjoying her company. She is in the best shape of the past five years.

I hope everyone is having a great new year.

 

[Fl2play]

Life has gotten very busy and fun times have pretty much stopped completely. My wife hasn’t played with anyone other than me since early November and has only met her regular fuck buddy twice since the end of September. I think he and I are both equally frustrated with the lack of action. Though, my wife and I generally find time to fuck about once a week.

I have tried to find the “on” button for my wife as I certainly miss her kinky side. She has been very busy with work and normal life. I suppose one good change is that she has lost over 25 lbs over the past few months and is definitely looking fantastic. Whenever the time comes where she wants more attention, there will be a long line of men interested in enjoying her company. She is in the best shape of the past five years.

I hope everyone is having a great new year.

You have two things going on my friend, I believe it would be a good time to check on age-appropriate hormone replacement therapy or HRT, is that is the number one indicator of an issue, that's very real in today's world. It can be easily rectified with slight hormone assistance... it's very real situation we've been through it.

Additionally, please do not let her appearance improvement, i.e. weight loss go unnoticed, she needs appropriate positive affirmation for that from you, regardless of any extra curricular activities. I wish you the best and please look upon this as constructive criticism and suggestion our best wishes. wishing you both great sex always.👍💕

 

[coastalkid]

Patience is probably the best choice. That is by no means the easy choice though because it doesn't really address any frustration you have. I'd guess that a "pause" or "stepping away" is preferable to continuing to play but behind your back or being excluded intentionally.

I would agree with you regarding the cumulative effect of her getting in better shape and how that affects her overall confidence and self image. You'd think one day she'd look at herself in the mirror and say, "Lookin' good girl!" That should remind her of her playing days and possible desires to go again. Then again, it may not be anything other than just a healthy focus.

It makes me think. If she's confident about herself being attractive, then maybe her choice to slow things to a crawl is more about the lifestyle and whether she really wants it. There's a chance that she may see it as a predictable dead end. She may even not like the way she sees herself and upset with herself that she became comfortable with it. Or, I could be way the fuck off, just thinking of the possibilities.

One thing is absolutely certain, she knows what you like and she knows she's not doing that so much. She knows your kink and what gets you going. She has to know that she's not doing that. It has to be something that she thinks about. Has she initiated any conversation on the topic? If it was me I'd wait until she did and not bring it up. She may be anticipating that.

I guess a big question is if she calls it good and wants to put in the past, would you be cool with that? In a lot of ways you've had more fun and experience than most already. If by chance there are still things that you yourself want to experience, is there any way you could tell her without it coming across as a complaint or dissatisfaction?

I can see how "landing the plane" (ie ending the lifestyle) can be tricky. In an ideal world you are both ready to quit at the same time. Otherwise, there has to be some tension from one wanting to quit and the other not.

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

You have two things going on my friend, I believe it would be a good time to check on age-appropriate hormone replacement therapy or HRT, is that is the number one indicator of an issue, that's very real in today's world. It can be easily rectified with slight hormone assistance... it's very real situation we've been through it.

Additionally, please do not let her appearance improvement, i.e. weight loss go unnoticed, she needs appropriate positive affirmation for that from you, regardless of any extra curricular activities. I wish you the best and please look upon this as constructive criticism and suggestion our best wishes. wishing you both great sex always.👍💕

Great observation. Ironically, she started HRT several months ago. I talked to her yesterday about how it seems to me that the HRT may be having an adverse effect on her sex drive. She did agree that she hasn’t been as interested and said she would talk with the Dr office who is managing the HRT. It can take some time for everything to normalize again.

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

Patience is probably the best choice. That is by no means the easy choice though because it doesn't really address any frustration you have. I'd guess that a "pause" or "stepping away" is preferable to continuing to play but behind your back or being excluded intentionally.

I would agree with you regarding the cumulative effect of her getting in better shape and how that affects her overall confidence and self image. You'd think one day she'd look at herself in the mirror and say, "Lookin' good girl!" That should remind her of her playing days and possible desires to go again. Then again, it may not be anything other than just a healthy focus.

It makes me think. If she's confident about herself being attractive, then maybe her choice to slow things to a crawl is more about the lifestyle and whether she really wants it. There's a chance that she may see it as a predictable dead end. She may even not like the way she sees herself and upset with herself that she became comfortable with it. Or, I could be way the fuck off, just thinking of the possibilities.

One thing is absolutely certain, she knows what you like and she knows she's not doing that so much. She knows your kink and what gets you going. She has to know that she's not doing that. It has to be something that she thinks about. Has she initiated any conversation on the topic? If it was me I'd wait until she did and not bring it up. She may be anticipating that.

I guess a big question is if she calls it good and wants to put in the past, would you be cool with that? In a lot of ways you've had more fun and experience than most already. If by chance there are still things that you yourself want to experience, is there any way you could tell her without it coming across as a complaint or dissatisfaction?

I can see how "landing the plane" (ie ending the lifestyle) can be tricky. In an ideal world you are both ready to quit at the same time. Otherwise, there has to be some tension from one wanting to quit and the other not.

All great questions. Honestly, I enjoy her playing and coming home to me. But, I also enjoy spending time with my wife alone. I have wondered if maybe this has run its course for her and she craves monogamy again. It is possible that the shine is gone from the kink for her. Or maybe she just needs a break. While I am pretty open with my thoughts, my wife is more reserved with her thoughts. She has shared a little bit, but I have many more questions. For now, I am going to sit back and see if she brings it up or not.

I will provide an update as soon as I have something to share. All the best!

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

My wife really hasn’t said much about sex with me or others for the past week. Now, we have both been very busy every day during this time with both work and family stuff. She did admit to playing with herself twice one day over the weekend while I was at work. That same day, she hinted that there was plenty left for me later, but by the time we got everything done that needed done, we were both exhausted.

We will have some car time alone this weekend and I am interested if she will bring up anything. While my mind is churning, I am going to sit back and wait for her to bring it up.

I hope all is well! Stay kinky my friends!

 

[Serendipitycpl]

what an amazing journey and thread. Thank you for sharing.

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

I just wanted to provide a quick update. Not much to report as my wife hasn’t played with anyone else since early November and hasn’t said anything to me about playing outside of marriage since our last conversation. She did go to dinner last week with a male friend who she has played with a couple of times. Generally, this would be a good sign, but this guy is mainly just a friend she talks to a lot, but doesn’t play with a lot. She enjoys his company, but doesn’t enjoy him sexually.

While I would love to ask my wife to spread her wings again, since our last conversation, I have committed to keeping my wishes to myself until she brings it up again.

A couple of weeks back, we were engaged in a steamy bedroom session. I was doing my best to tease her without actually pleasing. I was kissing her body everywhere but where she most wanted to be kissed. I refused to let her touch me in any way. I then started licking her pussy, but only focused on the perimeter and kept hinting that I was going to lick her clit, but then kept delaying it. Eventually, I began licking her slit up and down with an occasional temporary flick across her clit. She was getting so wet and gyrating her hips in an attempt to get me to spend more time on her clit. I would randomly stick my tongue into her pussy, but only as a tease. Before long, she was begging for my cock. I asked her what she was willing to do in order to get it. She started with offering a blowjob, but I said she needed to offer more than that. She then asked me what I wanted. I refused to answer and said she needs to keep offering up something she can do to “earn” my cock. I did tease her without actually pleasing the tip of my cock, but would not enter her in any way. Then, I went back to licking her pussy. Eventually, she took control and gave me a phenomenal blowjob before asking what I wanted enough to give her my cock. I told her I wanted her to suck my cock after I had cum and she agreed. I really wanted to ask her to promise to bring me a cum filled pussy, but that would have violated my promise to myself. In the end, I gave my wife what she wanted, but she did not follow through with the blowjob ending. I was hoping she would be able to get me going for round two. To be fair, it was very late and we were both exhausted.

She did bring it up the next day and asked if there was something else I wanted. I paused, but didn’t say that I would love a cum filled pussy. Nothing else has been said since that point. We have been so busy, we haven’t had sex since then. Definitely hoping to end the drought soon, but it is Monday of another busy week and not likely to change until this weekend. I think she was fishing to see if I want her to get more action. I am going to wait for her to mention it. The closest we have come to talking about it was a couple of comments she made about her most recent fuck buddy reaching out. She hasn’t told him she is likely done. Instead, she tells him she is too busy.

I guess only she knows where she stands.

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

We may be making some progress again. My wife mentioned having a kinky dream about one of her male coworkers. Then, within the next week, she was talking during sex about starting to play with other people again. Finally, last weekend, she said she was going to bring me home a present after going in to work for a couple of hours to catch up on a few things. She was planning to reach out to her most recent fuck buddy and see if he wanted to meet. Unfortunately, he had unfriended her on their communication app so she figured he must have moved on. They had been talking still, but she hadn’t made time to meet with him for a few months. I guess he got tired of waiting.

She doesn’t enjoy having to filter through a bunch of talkers to find someone she enjoys fucking, but I think she is ready to start her search again. Fingers crossed!

 

[wnyguy7169]

I see a lot of questions on how to get your wife or gf to play with others. I don't have a one size fits all solution, but can share how my sexy wife and I got here.

The Background:
For us, a critical element was a very sexual lady from day one. When I first met my wife, she was in her early twenties and she had spent the previous few years spreading her sexual wings. I was ten years her senior and had recently escaped from a bad marriage. I was not looking for any serious relationship but my future wife had other ideas. From the first time we met, she knew she wanted to marry me. After playing around with plenty of men, she was ready to settle down and I was a very safe option. I was well established in my career, financially secure, and certainly not a player. In spite of all of that boring stuff, I was a pervert and very sexual myself. I loved the fact that she was young but very experienced in the bedroom. We married after a couple years dating and over the next ten years, we had three kids.

As the years progressed, and life changed, I sensed my wife become frustrated with her freedom in many ways. I have become more of a homebody and she still enjoyed going out with friends. She didn't like me staying at home, but eventually found a nice circle of friends who enjoyed going out with her. I would occasionally join them, but usually let her do her own thing. Looking back, I can see where there were many opportunities for her to satisfy her sexual need for variety on those nights out, yet I have no actual proof that anything ever happened. Early in our marriage, I was jealous at times, but that mellowed over the years. We talked on many occasions about opening up our marriage. While she was very interested in variety herself, she didn't want me playing with other women. Of all the stages, this one took the longest to work through. She knew she wanted to play. we have a great sex lifestyle, but she wanted/needed variety like she had before we met. She also likes to be fucked hard and tossed around a bit by her lovers. That isn't my style, though I have found a bit more aggressive nature over time and can clearly see that she likes it!

The Big Defining Moment:
I don't remember exactly when the first opportunity presented itself, but it must have been in mid to late 2016. She would go out with friends a few times per month. Most of the time, it was a spur of the moment decision and she would email or text me at work letting me know she was going out. I never had a problem with it because I could relax at home with the kids. They were all old enough at this time that they could entertain themselves.

Everything was normal until the next morning. As we got up and moving, my sexy wife asked me if the option to play outside of marriage was still on the table. I told her it was and her response was if it had to be both ways. We discussed further in great detail. One of my first questions was "What caused this topic to come up today?" Of course I knew she went out and I assumed she had met someone interesting. I learned that she had run into some coworkers and a guy she has lusted after was clearly interested in her too. They both flirted openly but she was afraid to follow through because it had been so long since we last talked about playing with others. While we had discussed many times over the years, we never settled on a green light or laid out basic groundrules.

Over the next several days, we continued to discuss everything around playing with others. I also did extensive research online to better understand the hotwifing dynamic. We agreed that she could play with others and I would remain faithful to her. My main expectation was that she would need to meet all my sexual needs for this to work. The minute she put another man first or left me hanging because she played elsewhere, we would either need to end her play or renegotiate our arrangement.

With this green light, she tried to land this guy but it wasn't meant to be and she never had another chance. However, we did learn that I could handle another man pursuing her and her showing interest in another man without too much jealousy. We learned that open communication was the key as my concerns usually grew when I was left to my own imagination to guess what was going on.

The Rules:
As I mentioned above, once I agreed she could play with others, I spent many hours reading about other's experiences and the lessons they learned. This helped me understand what I was comfortable with and where my hard stops resided. My wife and I had numerous conversations about rules, guidelines, and expectations and quickly learned that we felt differently about a lot of things. One of the major hang ups was who could be considered for play. Much of the research I had done said to stay away from friends and coworkers. Just too much risk in the secret getting out if things went bad. However, my wife said she wouldn't be comfortable playing with a stranger and that there had to be a connection for her to feel comfortable. We also talked extensively about my involvement. My wife had tried a threesome once before we met and said in was more like alternating between both guys than actually having sex with both at the same time. As a result, she preferred to focus on one guy at a time which meant that I would be at home waiting to please her and get mine after she finished playing with someone else. We also both agreed that safe play was required for all activities. And open, honest communication was required at all times. She had full discretion on who she slept with, but would do her best to run it past me prior to sealing the deal. The most important rule was that we would fully experience this one time and then discuss how it went for both parties. If either of us didn't like it, we would not hold a grudge and would return to the vanilla lifestyle. It was critical to my wife that I would not hold this over her if it went badly.

The Evolution:
Over the next year, there wasn't much progress. She continued to go out but wasn't just looking for any guy. She wanted someone different than me. I am pretty average in all ways, so if she was going to play, it was going to be with a tall, dark, and handsome type. Especially to pop her hotwife cherry. There were a few closer calls but nothing ever lined up to where it happened. Each near miss was an opportunity to learn and for us to talk more. It was a long arduous process as I would sit at home each of her nights out with a raging boner wondering if tonight would be the night.

Finally Sealing The Deal:
Throughout the summer of 2018, she regularly met up with coworkers after work and on the weekends. We even hosted a few parties at our house. While nothing happened, that I know of, there was always plenty of flirting. I was pretty sure I had an idea who might be her first as one coworker made sure to attend all of the get together when my wife was there. My wife told me I was wrong and that they were just friends. Even when she came home at 5am one morning and told me they sat in the car talking all night. Hmmm?

Eventually, another candidate emerged out of nowhere and my wife seemed committed to making it happen. It was another coworker, but in her same department that started joining their work outings. I wouldn't have pegged him as her type, but he was a tall and solid built man. He wasn't clean shaven, and was about 5 years younger than her. I don't think he was on her radar screen until he started flirting heavily with her one night after consuming plenty of alcohol. We talked the next day, and she agreed that she was finally going to seal the deal. There were some logistical issues to work through. While he was in his late twenties, he still lived with his family. It was a cultural thing. One of his attractions was a heavy foreign accent. It took a couple of weeks to arrange everything. He was going to get a room at a nearby hotel and they could go there after the normal work outing and drinks. It was a great plan in theory, but we learned that letting a guy think long and hard about fucking a married coworker can cause some feelings of buyers remorse. They did end up getting together, but he was so nervous about what was going to happen, he drank too much and had trouble performing. When it was all said and done, they did fuck briefly, but between the alcohol and use of a condom, he wasn't able to stay hard. They did kiss and play for a while in other ways, but she did not get the vigorous fucking she was looking for. She did say he was longer and thicker than me, but it didn't last long enough to satisfy her. If I remember correctly, he did finger her to orgasm and then jacked off on her chest and belly. Then, they showered together and snuggled until he ....... She left once he ...... and came home to jump my bones. And, I was happy to finish what he started. While not a full success, she did slide another man's cock into her married pussy and shared all the details with me. I think the failure helped me accept the first time without any jealousy. However, it was a bummer for my wife and delayed the true start of her hotwife journey.

If I get 100 views or a handful of comments, I'll share more! Trust me when I say that this was just the beginning!

well written and a great story