There seems to be a common effect on the sex life of a married couple embarking in this lifestyle. I think it goes something like this (embelished with my own experience):

Obsessed with the desire to be cuckolded the husband encourages his wife to dress sexier, to be confident and to flirt. He slowly sows the seeds of the idea of hotwifery into her mind, eventually telling her she can be free to take lovers whilst he remains monogamous.

She gets more confident and enjoys the attention. Especially the extra love, attention, and rewards that she is getting from her husband.

She has doubts. She doubts that he is sincere. She fears that he has an ulterior motive (like wanting sex with other women). She doubts that he could really handle the proposed dynamic. She worries about the relationship, the family, the children. She thinks it's weird. She isn't interested. She loves her husband. She has no desire to go looking for someone else. But this new flirty her is fun. Marital sex gets better and more frequent. She's enjoying herself.
Eventually her flirtatiousness draws the attention of an old friend of her husband. He chats her up over repeated innocent meetings. She loves the attention and she finds him attractive. He's fitter and sexier than her husband. She doesn't know it, but she's found a potential Bull. She starts to test her husband, dropping the potential bull's name into conversations, to see how he will react. The husband is not stupid. He gets the message. He wants to be cuckolded. He subtly encourages her. Often bringing up the potential bull in conversation prior to marital sexual encounters. He notices that her orgasms are more intense on those occasions. Marital sex is now frequent and often amazing.


The bull is actively cobertly seducing her and she enjoys spending time with him in innocent social situations. She has developed a crush on him and she begins to fantasize about her crush during sex with her husband. Although she will never admit to it.
Still harboring her doubts she responds to her husbands encouragements to hotwifery by repeatedly telling him 'I only want you'. Nevertheless she has begun to contemplate cuckolding her husband and now the marital sex gets really good and wild.
Eventually she submits to her building desire for the bull. She begins covertly meeting the bull for sex. She keeps her burgeoning relationship with the bull secret.
She suspects that her husband knows but she doesn't have the confidence to find out for sure. The husband can sense something is going on but hell.... he wanted this. He told her she had a free pass. So he decides to kind of 'know but not know'. Which is essentially what they have both been doing been doing all along. From his subtle coaxing of her inner slut to the wild sex where they both secretly fantasied that she was with the bull. Marital sex remains wild (possibly wilder) for a short time.
Soon however marital sex goes to ...... as she battles to contain her emotions. The husband senses this. He showers her with love. He wins her heart. Marital sex improves again.
But she can't keep off the bull's cock for long so she learns to compartmentalize. The relationship with the bull will be just sex. It's her thing. The husband and the family are separate and sacrosanct. Marital sex now gradually changes. It's no longer wild or exciting. It's affectionate and loving. Slow and comfortable. It happens less often because she's being sexually satisfied by her affair with the bull.

The husband knows what is going on but he doesn't want to rock the boat. Marital sex fades away altogether. The husband just can't do what the bull does. She's been having sex with the husband for his sake. She no longer desires her husband. She starts to make excuses for not wanting to have sex with her husband. Like maybe stress, early menopause, or perhaps just the fact that he is just no good at it.
She replaces the affectionate, loving, sex with pure affection. Persuading her husband to let her take him into her arms at night and hold him like a teddy bear.

Fed up of his sexual advances being rejected the cuckold husband stops asking for sex and comes to enjoy falling asleep held tightly in her arms. Their relationship is stronger than ever. She loves her husband dearly. She holds him tightly. But she now no longer has marital sex.
Then what happens?

Obsessed with the desire to be cuckolded the husband encourages his wife to dress sexier, to be confident and to flirt. He slowly sows the seeds of the idea of hotwifery into her mind, eventually telling her she can be free to take lovers whilst he remains monogamous.

She gets more confident and enjoys the attention. Especially the extra love, attention, and rewards that she is getting from her husband.

She has doubts. She doubts that he is sincere. She fears that he has an ulterior motive (like wanting sex with other women). She doubts that he could really handle the proposed dynamic. She worries about the relationship, the family, the children. She thinks it's weird. She isn't interested. She loves her husband. She has no desire to go looking for someone else. But this new flirty her is fun. Marital sex gets better and more frequent. She's enjoying herself.
Eventually her flirtatiousness draws the attention of an old friend of her husband. He chats her up over repeated innocent meetings. She loves the attention and she finds him attractive. He's fitter and sexier than her husband. She doesn't know it, but she's found a potential Bull. She starts to test her husband, dropping the potential bull's name into conversations, to see how he will react. The husband is not stupid. He gets the message. He wants to be cuckolded. He subtly encourages her. Often bringing up the potential bull in conversation prior to marital sexual encounters. He notices that her orgasms are more intense on those occasions. Marital sex is now frequent and often amazing.


The bull is actively cobertly seducing her and she enjoys spending time with him in innocent social situations. She has developed a crush on him and she begins to fantasize about her crush during sex with her husband. Although she will never admit to it.
Still harboring her doubts she responds to her husbands encouragements to hotwifery by repeatedly telling him 'I only want you'. Nevertheless she has begun to contemplate cuckolding her husband and now the marital sex gets really good and wild.
Eventually she submits to her building desire for the bull. She begins covertly meeting the bull for sex. She keeps her burgeoning relationship with the bull secret.
She suspects that her husband knows but she doesn't have the confidence to find out for sure. The husband can sense something is going on but hell.... he wanted this. He told her she had a free pass. So he decides to kind of 'know but not know'. Which is essentially what they have both been doing been doing all along. From his subtle coaxing of her inner slut to the wild sex where they both secretly fantasied that she was with the bull. Marital sex remains wild (possibly wilder) for a short time.
Soon however marital sex goes to ...... as she battles to contain her emotions. The husband senses this. He showers her with love. He wins her heart. Marital sex improves again.
But she can't keep off the bull's cock for long so she learns to compartmentalize. The relationship with the bull will be just sex. It's her thing. The husband and the family are separate and sacrosanct. Marital sex now gradually changes. It's no longer wild or exciting. It's affectionate and loving. Slow and comfortable. It happens less often because she's being sexually satisfied by her affair with the bull.

The husband knows what is going on but he doesn't want to rock the boat. Marital sex fades away altogether. The husband just can't do what the bull does. She's been having sex with the husband for his sake. She no longer desires her husband. She starts to make excuses for not wanting to have sex with her husband. Like maybe stress, early menopause, or perhaps just the fact that he is just no good at it.
She replaces the affectionate, loving, sex with pure affection. Persuading her husband to let her take him into her arms at night and hold him like a teddy bear.

Fed up of his sexual advances being rejected the cuckold husband stops asking for sex and comes to enjoy falling asleep held tightly in her arms. Their relationship is stronger than ever. She loves her husband dearly. She holds him tightly. But she now no longer has marital sex.
Then what happens?