What do you consider sex?

[2wheel]

A few weeks ago we're watching a B or C grade movie, I don't remember much of it, but there was one quick scene, where a wife or girlfriend returns from a bachelorette party. The husband/boyfriend is suspicious. After some small talk she tells him "it was only a blow job, it's like we had sex or anything". It's one of those things your brain stores unconsciously.

A few days ago we were watching Bad Moms, again, one of HWR's favorite movies. Amy, the character played by Mila Kunis catches her husband masturbating on-line with another woman. Hubby says "it's mainstream", Amy says "it feels like cheating". Later on in the movie she cuckolds her husband with a widowed husband who goes down on her (seemingly) immediately after unloading (cleanup).

I'm a product of the early 60s-late 60s, my HW is a product of the late 60s-early 70s. Those 5 years were cataclysmic in sexual mores.

My question is. In your opinion what constitutes sex?

Just some scenarios in escalating order. Just add the words in front "Is is sex if"
1 2 women are masturbating at the same time in different rooms?
2 2 women are masturbating at the same time in different rooms and were on the phone or online with each other?
3 2 women are masturbating at the same time across from each other in the same room?
4 2 women are masturbating at the same time on the same bed?
5 2 women are masturbating at the same time on the same bed and they touch each other in a non-sexual manner?
6 2 women are masturbating at the same time on the same bed and they touch each other in a sexual manner (mutual masturbation)?
What it were 2 men?
What it were a man & woman?

Do you consider fellatio or cunnilingus consider having sex?
Do you consider anal intercourse as having sex?
Do you consider vaginal only intercourse as having sex?

I'm not seeking answers these as a Q&A, just setting some scenarios for your opinions and feelings.

 

[Vir Incestum]

According to Bill Clinton unless there is PIV it isn't sex.

 

[Wifeofzekethegeek]

If I put a condom on my finger and stick my finger in my ear, then I'm having sex with my ear, lolololol

 

[NeedaDomInMI]

If I put a condom on my finger and stick my finger in my ear, then I'm having sex with my ear, lolololol

Reminds me of the old story: My First Condom.

My first time buying condoms at age 16 I went to the pharmacy. The hot cashier at the counter could see that I was new at it and gave me the pack asking if I knew how to use one. I said, "No, it's my first time." She took one out, put it on her thumb, and told me to make sure it was on tight. I still looked confused. She looked around the store to see if it was empty and it was. "Just a minute," she said, and locked the door. She led me to the back room, took off her shirt and bra. “You like these?" I could only nod my head. She said to put the condom on. As I was putting it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her panties and laid down. "Come on," she said, "we don't have much time." So I climbed on her. It was so amazing that I couldn't hold back and KAPOW, I was done in two minutes! She looked at me concerned and asked "Did you put the condom on?" I said, "I sure did!" and held up my thumb to show her. She fainted.

 

[Orpheus]

I literally found out yesterday that in divorce terminology, adultery is only committed when a married person allows a penis to enter a vagina. Took me by surprise that 'sex' with another doesn't automatically qualify as adultery. By extension a guy getting a blowjob or anal weather with M, F or trans isn't committing adultery - figure that out!

 

[Scrambled]

There’s a Ted Talk with a professional who recounts some trends she’s seeing In casual sex.

. Many are giving bjs before a first kiss.

 

[2wheel]

Good video. Appropriate to my question.

I'm husband #2, she married #1 I think she was 26/27. We met she was 35. She said she was somewhat promiscuous when she was younger, so were a lot of women/girls, after all, she's a product of the late 60s/early70s. Never would talk about her sexual past.

Then in a moment of weakness she says during her single years she had sex with more than 300 different guys, then she goes silent and I see her thinking. She says probably closer to 500. Her words, her estimate.

I remember a discussion we had where I tried to hide my surprise and excitement about her sexual past. Somehow the discussion got to BJs. To me that is sex, to her it's not, actually to her only vaginal intercourse can be defined as sex, anyway she starts talking about greeting a person, saying hello and shaking hands, yada yada, and before I know it she's morphed a BJ to nothing more than a more personal way a more intimate way of greeting.

Now that I am writing this I realize something, her words to me were "..........she had sex with more than.........". Now I must rethink this, that this admission just represents intercourse and she undoubtedly had (in my opinion) sex with many more.

 

[LAbsTaCirauR]

Well there's the legal definition i.e. penis in mouth, vagina or anus but by that definition two lesbians could never actually have sex with each other.

For me personally, its not sex until the guy has had his cock in her pussy or ass. Blowjobs, cunnilingus, fingering, masturbation (solo or mutual) are all 'sex play' to my mind but its not actual sexual intercourse ('sex') until that cock is in one of her two holes. To my mind, its how you define sex in your relationship with your wife and in her relationship with the bull/play partner/FWB/etc that matters not so much the actual act itself. Those definitions could actually even differ for you even within those two relationships.

Of course none of this helps in defining when two lesbians are having sexual intercourse as its a very cock centric outlook. I guess we would need input from them as to when they consider sex to be happening between them...

 

[2wheel]

My example of the women was just that an example, hence my escalation to 2 men, then a man & a woman.

Your point is well taken, as you can see my definition is different from my wife's definition. AND different between legal eagles.


From SPAMdefinitions.uslegal.com/themes/default/img/uslegal-logo.png

Sex may also refer to sexual intercourse. The definition of sexual intercourse varies by state. Various state and local laws regulate sex, such as laws criminalizing underage sex and prostitution, testing for sexually transmitted diseases, and sale of obscene material. For example, in Eureka, Nevada, a law was enacted making it illegal for men with moustaches to kiss women.

The following is one state's statutory definition of sex:

"(5) "Sexual intercourse" means any penetration of the female sex organ by the male sex organ."


From Legal Information Institute

(2)the term “sexual act” means—
(A) contact between the penis and the vulva or the penis and the anus, and for purposes of this subparagraph contact involving the penis occurs upon penetration, however slight;
(B) contact between the mouth and the penis, the mouth and the vulva, or the mouth and the anus;
(C) the penetration, however slight, of the anal or genital opening of another by a hand or finger or by any object, with an intent to abuse, humiliate, harass, degrade, or arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any person; or
(D) the intentional touching, not through the clothing, of the genitalia of another person who has not attained the age of 16 years with an intent to abuse, humiliate, harass, degrade, or arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any person;