Since the time well before we were married we were VERY adventurous and he encouraged my sexual freedom. He kept at me to be even more sexual and to dress more slutty. I resisted some because I did NOT want him to think of me as a "slut" and end up not marrying me or divorcing me. That said, he was always trying to get me involved in sexual situations and sometimes I took the bait. I was pretty "flirty" and forward with other guys at times (sexy kissing, letting them feel me up, suck on my tits, finger me, rub their cocks, etc) but he never really said anything about it. He knew I enjoyed that and it was mostly just in harmless good fun. If I was going too far he would slow me down a bit, but I took LOTS of liberties with other guys, right in front of him. I had told him on our wedding night that I was NOT going to be faithful to him sexually and he found out very soon that I MEANT IT. He knew and suspected that I cheated a bit, but for the most part he trusted me. Mostly he thought I was just "fooling around" a bit with other guys (as we described it). I would tell him about fooling around with other guys plenty but he thought that just meant second or third base type stuff. He really had no idea that I was getting plenty of sex outside of our marriage though. I cheated on him for many years and eventually we just both somehow figured it out. We never talked about his occasional suspicions and when he did catch me pretty much red handed, I just lied about it and he believed it (I thought). He always left me alone in a situation where he knew I might be having sex with another guy because he trusted me and he didn't want to have an awkward situation or make a guy feel like he was in trouble (the lake, ski trips mostly). We had so much fun in those years and then the later years where he knew about my dalliances with other guys and enjoyed them. He would encourage me to "make up" stories about any guy I had been alone with and I often told him the TRUE version of what I had done, but I pretended that it was fantasy. He got off on that all of the time. Also, he MOST CERTAINLY was cheating on me at times too, just nowhere near as much as I was on him. He tried to be faithful and honest with me and he trusted me. That made cheating so much easier. The actual problem for me started with our becoming involved in the actual "lifestyle".
LS clubs, the people we would meet, the way so many acted and the turn offs were all very unappealing to me. If you read our first story in Lifestylers Mag we talked about that. I had to be really drunk to play in swinger clubs and I really NEVER had an enjoyable time at them for the most part. There were a few exceptions. We ended up quitting the LS because I just wasn't in to that at all. I really missed my cheating days and my extra-marital sex days before we got involved in the LS. I still had a few guys I cheated with during our non LS years but it wasn't like before. Among other things, the lifestyle has so much Erectile Disfunction, the guys are mostly older and there aren't nearly enough really fit guys. I never had a guy who couldn't get it up during all of my cheating years. The first guy who couldn't get it up for me was my husband's boss, who my husband was finally going to allow to fuck me in what would have been our first threesome. His boss was forty at the time and I was in my mid twenties. I coudn't believe that happened. I had never seen it before.
Eventually we worked out a plan that has been much more fun for us in the LS. Once we got back in, we did things completely differently. I became a "hotwife" and that allows me to date other guys and have sex with other guys under my terms. We still attend many LS functions, resorts, parties and clubs, but we do things way different now. I enjoy having a dating and sex life of my own and Mr HW enjoys my exploits too. He plays some and we play as a couple or group some too, but I prefer just dating or getting picked up by guys to the whole lifestyle scene.
So I suppose I was one of those who was reluctant about the lifestyle for a long time but I was never reluctant to have sex with guys outside of my marriage.
Mrs Hotwife
