Man, that’s actually a really good question and I’m gonna assume it’s gonna be different for every guy, but I can give you my backstory. Ever since I was a kid in the adolescence I was sort of chubby with no self-confidence. I used to live with a bunch of guys that were pussy hound so for me and evening was smoking a little bit of weed on the couch and listen to my friends bang the fuck out of the girlfriend I guess after listening to that on repeat for a couple of years I definitely Got a weird voyeuristic fetish. Combined with shitty self-esteem and having a very average, a small penis when I finally got a girlfriend who realized I couldn’t fuck her half as good as her ex I got cheated on. I was lucky enough to at a very young age meet up with an older woman that sort of introduced me to the concept that you can be with somebody emotionally, but not sexually and honestly that stuck with me my entire life into my current relationship. I think men like me who are a little bit, timid or self-conscious and certain aspects tend to attract women that will take advantage of them. It’s in a lot of ways like a positive parasitic relationship. My wife absolutely loves being able to ...... with whoever she wants in her exact words. It’s kind of like being single, but having the emotional stability of a good relationship. And for me, listening to her, watching her, Knowing that she’s hooking up is just an immense turn on physical and psychological.