Wife Flipped Out Last Night

Last night, my wife and I were relaxin in bed, a little buzzed. We were talking about some deep stuff and some sexual stuff, then I asked if she wanted a massage. I asked her if she liked if I blew larger loads, and said I was just curious. She said can you control that. I said kind of with diet and then briefly explained edging. She said the smaller the load the better bc it just leaks out on the way to the bathroom. She said she didn’t have anything else that she thought about.

So here I am massaging her hot body rubbing her with oil and so bring up the mojo survey we did a few weeks prior. We did it but never discussed it even though I had brought it up once or twice. She said sure and I brought up how the results (which she had never bothered to look at) had said we both selected a threesome. She laughed and kind of blew it off. She said really? I said well it would have to be all about you and pleasuring you. She said do you have someone in mind. I said no. Then a minute later she said would you be okay with a guy rubbing me down with oil in our bed like your doing right now? (Mind you my bare cock is rubbing against her lips as I massage her). I said well there would be a lot of conversations before that but yes maybe.

No response and I kept rubbing her. Then she gets up and says she needs some air.

Long story short she said that I’m an asshole and she can’t believe I would be okay with her fucking someone else. She said this is fucked up and it’s from all the porn you watch. She said she wants nothing to do With me right now and she slept in the basement.

There was apparently some swingers in my family that came out from my grandparents and she brought up how I must have gotten some of those genes. She said I would probably want to have a FMF at some point to which I replied I have no desire or intention for that. I said I only want to see you and be with you. She said but you want to see another guy fuck me.

I explained to her, I said I have never had these feelings in previous relationships, I never wanted to share, swap or do anything but I never was in a long term relationship where the other people didn’t ever cum/orgasm. I explained how she puts me down in our fights calling me a pussy and saying to be a man. At that point she said ohhh is that why you want a real man to fuck me. She said who do you have in mind. I said no one and I honestly don’t. She said oh maybe I should fuck Mike next door. Then she said she fucked him on his steps…I calmly said did you…she didn’t answer and instead continued yelling at me calling me an asshole.

Why would she be so descriptive about fucking my neighbor (40 year old divorced good looking jock type guy who she said she dislikes bc he is so arrogant). She complained about me hanging out with him whenever we get together. Now I am starting to think maybe something did happen.

Not even sure what to say to my wife at this point.

She said how could I dare risk our relationship like that and I kept saying how I didn’t say I was ready to actually do that and if she said hey that’s something I am not into, no big deal. She said I didn’t select that on the survey which she obviously did and as noted in my previous post I caught her talking about it before.
 
The big mistake most men make is being too direct, too much to the point. In addition, they are in a hurry. An erection only last so long, but a female's sexual arousal can last hours, if not days. The ideal situation is where she pesters you to try hotwifing, not the other way around. See https://www.wifewantstoplay.com/threads/the-first-step-towards-sharing-your-wife.16505/
I was not ever direct or to the point until the other night. Ultimately I think in the past week I’ve learned she has zero desire to sleep with anyone else. We went deep and ultimately she has said sex just doesn’t feel that good.

When we had makeup sex over the weekend though, at one point I had on a cock ring and was completely inside her. I guess the ring was rubbing against her funny and she mentioned it was great because she needs to tell me that stuff. I took it off and was nowhere near as turned on at that point, I put it back inside her. After a minute I said, does this feel as good. She said it doesn’t feel as good and didn’t understand. I explained how I could tell she liked being filled up more. She actually understood when we did that and she said she is open to trying a penis sleeve now to see if she likes it.
 
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I think she has had affairs but she does not want to admit it to not ruin the relationship. It's all about trust. She's not confident that you really want what you told her
Amen! I believe she has and maybe still having affairs, cheating on you. That aggressive explosive reaction is a dead give away you touched a sensitive nerve. Why? She’s concerned you suspect her infidelity maybe?
In my opinion when she said she fucked your neighbor she was testing you to see what you knew. You could have said in reply: Yes I know baby can I watch next time? It turns me on knowing you fucked him.
Wonder what she would say in response to that?
Either way she’s very sensitive about this issue / fantasy/ pillow talk for some reason. Thats a shame when husband and wife can’t share sexual fantasies with each other and get turned on.
My exwife was like that. I divorced her and found a more compatible Hot Wife that enjoys her dirty old man of a husband 😈
 
Last night, my wife and I were relaxin in bed, a little buzzed. We were talking about some deep stuff and some sexual stuff, then I asked if she wanted a massage. I asked her if she liked if I blew larger loads, and said I was just curious. She said can you control that. I said kind of with diet and then briefly explained edging. She said the smaller the load the better bc it just leaks out on the way to the bathroom. She said she didn’t have anything else that she thought about.

So here I am massaging her hot body rubbing her with oil and so bring up the mojo survey we did a few weeks prior. We did it but never discussed it even though I had brought it up once or twice. She said sure and I brought up how the results (which she had never bothered to look at) had said we both selected a threesome. She laughed and kind of blew it off. She said really? I said well it would have to be all about you and pleasuring you. She said do you have someone in mind. I said no. Then a minute later she said would you be okay with a guy rubbing me down with oil in our bed like your doing right now? (Mind you my bare cock is rubbing against her lips as I massage her). I said well there would be a lot of conversations before that but yes maybe.

No response and I kept rubbing her. Then she gets up and says she needs some air.

Long story short she said that I’m an asshole and she can’t believe I would be okay with her fucking someone else. She said this is fucked up and it’s from all the porn you watch. She said she wants nothing to do With me right now and she slept in the basement.

There was apparently some swingers in my family that came out from my grandparents and she brought up how I must have gotten some of those genes. She said I would probably want to have a FMF at some point to which I replied I have no desire or intention for that. I said I only want to see you and be with you. She said but you want to see another guy fuck me.

I explained to her, I said I have never had these feelings in previous relationships, I never wanted to share, swap or do anything but I never was in a long term relationship where the other people didn’t ever cum/orgasm. I explained how she puts me down in our fights calling me a pussy and saying to be a man. At that point she said ohhh is that why you want a real man to fuck me. She said who do you have in mind. I said no one and I honestly don’t. She said oh maybe I should fuck Mike next door. Then she said she fucked him on his steps…I calmly said did you…she didn’t answer and instead continued yelling at me calling me an asshole.

Why would she be so descriptive about fucking my neighbor (40 year old divorced good looking jock type guy who she said she dislikes bc he is so arrogant). She complained about me hanging out with him whenever we get together. Now I am starting to think maybe something did happen.

Not even sure what to say to my wife at this point.

She said how could I dare risk our relationship like that and I kept saying how I didn’t say I was ready to actually do that and if she said hey that’s something I am not into, no big deal. She said I didn’t select that on the survey which she obviously did and as noted in my previous post I caught her talking about it before.
I agree with all the comments . Reading what your wife said, hard for me to believe , she is someone who is refusing flat …it seems she had a thing or two but doesn’t want you to know …she wants to do things on her own terms without giving you the slightest idea , especially if she asks you, if you have anyone on your mind ?!!

I am sorry to say this, but someone who says she dislikes a person because he is arrogant etc…trying to distance him from being the center of attention in her pursuit, so you wont blow her cover …and I think for her not wanting you to talk about you watching, thinking that you will drop the subject if she tried to shut it off with her reply

I might be wrong, but to me, that’s not being truthful, and what is bothersome, you both as a couple should know , if she is indeed going behind your back with this neighbour she claims she doesn’t like ,that’s not right…

And I think as one of the posters previously mentioned, that’s a response some women do to try to shield themselves from any blame , not wanting to share such experience with a spouse….selfish on their part…If I may say
 
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Last night, my wife and I were relaxin in bed, a little buzzed. We were talking about some deep stuff and some sexual stuff, then I asked if she wanted a massage. I asked her if she liked if I blew larger loads, and said I was just curious. She said can you control that. I said kind of with diet and then briefly explained edging. She said the smaller the load the better bc it just leaks out on the way to the bathroom. She said she didn’t have anything else that she thought about.

So here I am massaging her hot body rubbing her with oil and so bring up the mojo survey we did a few weeks prior. We did it but never discussed it even though I had brought it up once or twice. She said sure and I brought up how the results (which she had never bothered to look at) had said we both selected a threesome. She laughed and kind of blew it off. She said really? I said well it would have to be all about you and pleasuring you. She said do you have someone in mind. I said no. Then a minute later she said would you be okay with a guy rubbing me down with oil in our bed like your doing right now? (Mind you my bare cock is rubbing against her lips as I massage her). I said well there would be a lot of conversations before that but yes maybe.

No response and I kept rubbing her. Then she gets up and says she needs some air.

Long story short she said that I’m an asshole and she can’t believe I would be okay with her fucking someone else. She said this is fucked up and it’s from all the porn you watch. She said she wants nothing to do With me right now and she slept in the basement.

There was apparently some swingers in my family that came out from my grandparents and she brought up how I must have gotten some of those genes. She said I would probably want to have a FMF at some point to which I replied I have no desire or intention for that. I said I only want to see you and be with you. She said but you want to see another guy fuck me.

I explained to her, I said I have never had these feelings in previous relationships, I never wanted to share, swap or do anything but I never was in a long term relationship where the other people didn’t ever cum/orgasm. I explained how she puts me down in our fights calling me a pussy and saying to be a man. At that point she said ohhh is that why you want a real man to fuck me. She said who do you have in mind. I said no one and I honestly don’t. She said oh maybe I should fuck Mike next door. Then she said she fucked him on his steps…I calmly said did you…she didn’t answer and instead continued yelling at me calling me an asshole.

Why would she be so descriptive about fucking my neighbor (40 year old divorced good looking jock type guy who she said she dislikes bc he is so arrogant). She complained about me hanging out with him whenever we get together. Now I am starting to think maybe something did happen.

Not even sure what to say to my wife at this point.

She said how could I dare risk our relationship like that and I kept saying how I didn’t say I was ready to actually do that and if she said hey that’s something I am not into, no big deal. She said I didn’t select that on the survey which she obviously did and as noted in my previous post I caught her talking about it before.
I can totally relate to this post - my wife did similar but more devious too - she ha this laugh when she is nervous so I was riding her - she’s lying there with a smirk - obviously I’m wondering WTF ? She notices and says she can’t really feel me - guys I am a decent length and thick - have had other women comment on how good my dick is - anyhoo that led to a conversation about what to do about it - tried a penis sleeve but hurt end of my dick - so I suggested maybe we could find someone even just for a one off with a bigger fatter one - her eyes lit up - she was all for it - we looked around and put an ad in a dating site for a stunt cock - happy days BAM - you dirty perverted bastard etc etc - what makes you think I would do that , I’m your wife - apparently she was only leading me on to see how fat I would go with it etc etc - divorce was only a heartbeat away - I was like - all you needed to say was no your not interested and it was all about your pleasure - which it really was - I was devastated - since then she has done the same again with another couple of things and I’m thinking more and more - do I really want to be with this scheming devious person - the same person that was fucking her sisters guy !! Sorry it’s so long but hard to explain that in 6 words - my personal opinion is that she just brought up Mike because he is the neighbour nothing more nothing less
 
I was not ever direct or to the point until the other night. Ultimately I think in the past week I’ve learned she has zero desire to sleep with anyone else. We went deep and ultimately she has said sex just doesn’t feel that good.

When we had makeup sex over the weekend though, at one point I had on a cock ring and was completely inside her. I guess the ring was rubbing against her funny and she mentioned it was great because she needs to tell me that stuff. I took it off and was nowhere near as turned on at that point, I put it back inside her. After a minute I said, does this feel as good. She said it doesn’t feel as good and didn’t understand. I explained how I could tell she liked being filled up more. She actually understood when we did that and she said she is open to trying a penis sleeve now to see if she likes it.
A good general rule is to NEVER ask if something sexual feels good? Why not? Most women are too agreeable, and they will always say, yes, no matter their discomfort. Instead, ask: How can I make it better?
 
Amen! I believe she has and maybe still having affairs, cheating on you. That aggressive explosive reaction is a dead give away you touched a sensitive nerve. Why? She’s concerned you suspect her infidelity maybe?
In my opinion when she said she fucked your neighbor she was testing you to see what you knew. You could have said in reply: Yes I know baby can I watch next time? It turns me on knowing you fucked him.
Wonder what she would say in response to that?
Either way she’s very sensitive about this issue / fantasy/ pillow talk for some reason. Thats a shame when husband and wife can’t share sexual fantasies with each other and get turned on.
My exwife was like that. I divorced her and found a more compatible Hot Wife that enjoys her dirty old man of a husband 😈
I don’t think you can really know where she is with all this but it’s plain she has a temper. Everybody has their own thoughts but I think the guy next door might be a fantasy of hers. Maybe she masturbate about him. Don’t rule him (or his type) out!
 
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First update in a while…so my wife and I have been arguing about where to live and some other just life stuff. Been arguing for 5 days which always sucks and she is supposed to get her period tomorrow which explains some of the argument lasting so long.

Massaged her this morning and we started to resolve some stuff but arguments continued and she brought up how it was weird that I wanted a third person in the bedroom. I told her how she was the first girl to give me a blowjob and actually finish me off that way. I said I never did it with anyone else but it totally made the next time easier. I figured if we got a guy to get you to your first orgasm it would be easier after the fact for me to give you an orgasm.

After that she got seemingly mad but she said some important things!

What happens if I enjoyed it and it opened up a whole new world I don’t want to give up. I said that’s stuff we would need to discuss.

She got more frustrated by my response and said what if I got an STD.

She had said these things before but I realized something as I am typing this out…she is thinking everything through…whether she knows it or not.

Then I said hey I need to understand why you said you could have sex with our neighbor on his steps. She said she just came up with any example…I explained to her how oddly specific that whole thing was and she kept blowing it off. She said I just said what do you want me to have sex with “name”…and I said “on his steps” like it’s something you’ve thought about…she said no. Then as we talk and somethings got heated she said well “neighbor’s name” probably got a thick dick and he’s probably bigger because he’s a bigger guy.

This is definitely progressing.
 
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First update in a while…so my wife and I have been arguing about where to live and some other just life stuff. Been arguing for 5 days which always sucks and she is supposed to get her period tomorrow which explains some of the argument lasting so long.

Massaged her this morning and we started to resolve some stuff but arguments continued and she brought up how it was weird that I wanted a third person in the bedroom. I told her how she was the first girl to give me a blowjob and actually finish me off that way. I said I never did it with anyone else but it totally made the next time easier. I figured if we got a guy to get you to your first orgasm it would be easier after the fact for me to give you an orgasm.

After that she got seemingly mad but she said some important things!

What happens if I enjoyed it and it opened up a whole new world I don’t want to give up. I said that’s stuff we would need to discuss.

She got more frustrated by my response and said what if I got an STD.

She had said these things before but I realized something as I am typing this out…she is thinking everything through…whether she knows it or not.

Then I said hey I need to understand why you said you could have sex with our neighbor on his steps. She said she just came up with any example…I explained to her how oddly specific that whole thing was and she kept blowing it off. She said I just said what do you want me to have sex with “name”…and I said “on his steps” like it’s something you’ve thought about…she said no. Then as we talk and somethings got heated she said well “neighbor’s name” probably got a thick dick and he’s probably bigger because he’s a bigger guy.

This is definitely progressing.
It sounds like she is questioning her safety and, indirectly, your need to protect her.
Ground rules may go a long way to addressing her concerns. For example, only condoms for Bulls until you are both comfortable that he is not sleeping around and is certified clean.
Another example, if she is on birth control, what about pregnancy. It is not something to take lightly. Would a prospective Bull move to the front of the line if he has had a vasectomy?
Good topics for ongoing discussion. As the two of you resolve items, find a place to write them down.
 
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It sounds like she is questioning her safety and, indirectly, your need to protect her.
Ground rules may go a long way to addressing her concerns. For example, only condoms for Bulls until you are both comfortable that he is not sleeping around and is certified clean.
Another example, if she is on birth control, what about pregnancy. It is not something to take lightly. Would a prospective Bull move to the front of the line if he has had a vasectomy?
Good topics for ongoing discussion. As the two of you resolve items, find a place to write them down.
We are done having kids and I had a vasectomy so that’s probably an issue.

She hasn’t been on birth control in a decade and wouldn’t go back on it. I don’t think she has ever really used condoms much and definitely has said she doesn’t like them. We tried using them during one time we weren’t trying to get pregnant and just gave up immediately. She hates the feeling of them so I think that’s going to be a point of struggle. Trying to enjoy someone else that’s bigger and has a condom on might be a struggle…

She did bring up getting pregnant in one argument so I think somewhere in her head she knows she wouldn’t use them.
 
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We had another follow up conversation last night. Still making up and we haven’t had sex all week. I could tell she was ready to resolve everything because she had our bedroom door locked which told me she is ready for makeup sex…I still felt weird about everything with the neighbor because that’s just not comfortable and even though I am willing to have a threesome or allow my wife to enjoy someone else, I don’t want it with someone I have to see all the time. I want the option to never see them again.

So I brought up the neighbor and what she said. She said I don’t care about the neighbor and he was just the person I could use as an example. (She seems to think body size and dick size are correlated which I don’t science agrees with but let me know if someone thinks differently .) I said look I’m sorry I ever brought this whole thing up and its not something serious. She said yes it is, you’ve told me previously this is something you fantasize about which made me embarrassed. I tried to say I don’t but she said, “you even told me you bust a really big load when you cum thinking about me with someone else.” I said okay I do masturbate to that sometimes…actually it’s probably 50-75%. I just love the thought of her orgasming.

My takeaway again is she is hearing me and thinking about it because it stuck with her. It’s not like so many other things she forgets. Then she told me, she doesn’t need anyone else because I am all she wants. She said what if she started fantasizing about someone else in bed, then started fantasizing about them when I am not around and then started acting on it.

I really wasn’t prepared for this conversation, because no matter how much you read and prep their is so much emotion and I don’t want to fuck up the marriage. I told her that’s why I didn’t want someone we knew or nearby. She said oh so we get some random person from a bar or something. She was upset when she said it and I told her I hadn’t thought that far ahead but ultimately I think we have to find someone online and meet them at bar outside of our area. We sat in silence for a while bc we were both emotionally drained. Then we made up, kissed and had some really hot sex. She was on the last day or two of her pms which usually means dry boring sex, but instead she was really hot. She should be getting her period today, but it was like she was ovulating…maybe from the convo or just makeup sex. I told her to take me in her mouth. She got me close to finishing and then stopped. I said do you want me to finish inside you and she said yes. Her pussy was perfect…warm, wet and open. 5-10 minutes later my dick was sliding into her and I could barely feel her. I love when she opens up like that and a few minutes later I came deep inside her. So hot….I could tell at one point she was close to cumming but it just always dies off.

I do wonder if someone bigger would give her a better stretch or fill her up when she is really hot like that and actually bring her to orgasm.
 
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We are done having kids and I had a vasectomy so that’s probably an issue.

She hasn’t been on birth control in a decade and wouldn’t go back on it. I don’t think she has ever really used condoms much and definitely has said she doesn’t like them. We tried using them during one time we weren’t trying to get pregnant and just gave up immediately. She hates the feeling of them so I think that’s going to be a point of struggle. Trying to enjoy someone else that’s bigger and has a condom on might be a struggle…

She did bring up getting pregnant in one argument so I think somewhere in her head she knows she wouldn’t use them.
So, it is her body you two are fantasizing about. She has some concerns, and rightfully so. If she is ever going to move forward to the hot wife life, she is going to need to feel safe.
 
I was thinking about trying this route…my wife finally agreed to do sex toy shopping with me this coming weekend which is perfect because we have a weekend coming up away from the kids.
My wife seems to enjoy the fantasy of taking on lovers while I watch but I’m certain it would be a challenge to get her to commit to her actually fucking another guy… and although I say I’m good with it, I wonder if staying in the fantasy lane isn’t the best thing for right now.
I surprise my wife frequently by buying all her sex toys. We’ve gone into some sex shops but she’s pretty shy so we usually just go in to look and besides there’s better selection and prices online.
Her current favorites are a small clit vibrator (the Satisfyher) to get her warmed up then she gets out one or two of her realistic silicone dildos to show me how she can fuck and suck them…. While she makes me sit in a chair by the bed to watch. Sometimes she’ll tell me to stroke myself while I watch her, and lately she waits until I get good and hard then asks me to go fix her breakfast so I can only hear her cumming with her “buddies”. Not sure which drives me more crazy.
So fantasy life isn’t so bad even with a “reluctant” wife.