Experienced and evolving Poly/Cuck couple


Active Member
Feb 18, 2021
Been a lurker here for a short while, figured it was time to post. I have been on other cuckold sites over the years, posting about some of our off and on adventures as well as fantasies, etc.
I am 49, she is 40. We've been married over 16 years, together for 18. Our relationship was always open, ethically non-monogamous but always slanted towards cuckolding as a kink, not so much a lifestyle (until this past year and a half).
We toyed with it, used it as a fun event with the rare bull we could find given our location and situations at the time. Nothing lasted very long, and it never got "deep". It was mostly with black men, though we had two white guys throughout our adventures. We tried to keep any of them as a regular, but it never worked out (again, location and work situation).

About four years ago location no longer was a problem, and then two years ago the work situation was no longer a problem. So we decided to really open things up and start swinging. She had started a new exercise routine which resurrected her libido, but because of medical reasons and life, my libido started to crash. Timing sucks. But we were always open, so there was no way I was going to stop her just because my libido crashed. She let me have a girlfriend that I saw for over five years because her libido took a tumble. Fair is fair, and that's who we are.
So she met someone. He wasn't into the whole being watched thing. He never even heard of cuckolding. He was willing to entertain it, but I had said not to worry about it (no libido, no care about sex, no thrill in cuckolding obviously). But by the definition - he was cucking me. Just not in the sense we all love about cuckolding. She kept no secrets. She wasn't being sneaking or deceitful. I just didn't want to watch, or hear the stories...I was on autopilot for seven months.
Well their relationship grew pretty serious. When I got the appropriate treatments and my libido came back, I came off of autopilot and everything became clear. It was out in the open, I just didn't pay attention. Yes, she and he fell in love.
Well, that's a problem...because upon my "return", it felt like I was demoted, betrayed, and replaced in more areas than just sex. So we had our fight. It was a big, long, nasty, marriage threatening fight.
I say the above as a warning to all of you - wannabes and experienced. All these years leading up to it, we dreamt, fantasized, seriously talked, and planned what a cuckold marriage full time would look like. I always said "you can't take it too far". I meant it, because I never dreamed she could. Well, she did. The second you say there are no limits, you set yourself up to fail. When you say "It will never happen to me" - it will!
So we had to navigate through all of that. She wasn't going to divorce me, but she wasn't going to stop seeing him. The ball was fully in my court. I had to decide: Walk away and quit, or accept she will still see him and make the marriage work. I worked this out for months and came the conclusion I wanted the latter.

Now most cucks that you read about are monogamous. They like to watch or sit at home and wait to hear the stories. Don't get me wrong, I love to watch and hear the stories. Cuckolding isn't my biggest drug, but it is a major dealer for my drug. My drug? Her orgasms. I love to see, hear, smell, taste, witness her orgasms. Of course I love bringing her to orgasm, but I love just as much seeing her get there with someone else. THAT is my sex drug. That is what I love about sex. Not my own pleasure or orgasm...but hers. I guess that is partly why I love cuckolding. I could witness that and not have to "do the work", lol. Of course I love other things about cuckolding.
I am not a typical, what you read about in the spank bank, cuckold. I have a longer and thicker than average penis. I have the opposite problem of premature ejaculation. I suffer from desensitized penis due to two back surgeries, scar tissue, and probably even some medications I took in the past for extended periods of time. I can't orgasm from normal intercourse. So I am a woman's wet dream, so I have been told. I can last forever and fill em up just as good as any bulls most cuck couples look for. Outside of the bedroom, I am pretty alpha. I am a take charge, get things done, make things happen natural leader type. No one would guess that in the bedroom I like to be put in a pink chastity cage, mocked and embarrassed that my wife sleeps around and I let her treat me like her pet bitch, and that I love it.
And I do love it. The meaner she can get, the more I love it. The problem here is my wife is just not a mean person. She can't really take it to the level I crave, but she does try. However with our dynamic, I have to "top from the bottom" so to speak. I have to drive my own cuckold training. She'll go along with it if I initiate it, but she won't enforce anything seriously. The only time she ever took a hard line with me ever was when she said she wasn't going to stop seeing him. I was hoping she'd build from that, and she still might. For now, though, that's where she left it.
Anyways...as you can see, I will never offer the "spank bank" bullshit version of our cuckolding experience. I'm not going to sit here and tell you he shoves his cock in my mouth and she got a tattoo with his name or she's planning to have his baby. None of that happens, and never will.
Frankly, he and I seriously dislike each other. We don't communicate, period. That is mostly by her design because we both tell her we dislike and distrust the other. So she is kind of forced to live two separate lives. I wish she didn't have to go through that, but until I can have a sit down with him and clear the air...that's the way it has to be. But it also adds that level of cuckold angst to it too. Lots of fantasies out there about being cuckolded by a bully or an enemy. I can attest that it does add to the experience.
So our marriage is now poly/cuck. While I am allowed to date, and I have...so long as she keeps engaged with me I feel no desire to. She tells me some details about her dynamic with him (a little D/s and BDSM, but it's mostly bf/gf now). I'll get my handjob while she shares with me why she likes him so much in the bedroom, how good he is, how I lost an opportunity to ever be able to witness it, etc. It works.
We're now at a place where, when she says she is going to see him, I will put on a chastity cage and remain in that chastity cage until she leaves his house. Be it for a few hours or an overnight...if she's with him, I'm locked up. She has one key. The other is kept in a sealed enveloped she signed over the flap. I can only open it in an emergency without her permission. If I have a date, I have to text and await permission. This was my idea. She signed on.

We're bring it up to the level we always dreamt of, but I have to take the small lead in this and she will hop on. It's kind of like driving in a driver's ed car. I am in the driver seat with full control, but in the passenger seat she has access to brake and gas pedals as well. The end goal is to to make this situation as fun and as fulfilling as possible, meeting all our needs, pushing the limits we have discovered and finding new areas to explore.

Eventually, we will move to me wearing a condom for sex. Right now we are all tested clean, so no one uses a condom. However, being the beta that I am in the bedroom, we need to reaffirm that by eventually making me wear a condom for intercourse, then wearing one for handjobs as well. We also discuss slowly cutting me off from intercourse all together. She loves to tell him that it is his pussy. He gets anal, I never have. He gets blowjobs, that was gone a long time ago. Again, these are my ideas and she is jumping on. Can I live without intercourse? Yes. Do I WANT to? Not really...BUT if I am cut off from it and she adds the teasing, humiliation, and denial games that go with it - I would love that. Anyways, if we go that route and I really need intercourse, well - I can date someone. Keep my tests up to date and stay clean, and that need can be met elsewhere.

But between my wife and I - this is the road we are on.
And I want to be the best cuckold husband to her possible.

So that's me. Feel free to comment (be respectful please) and ask questions. I know I have left out some details, but this is long enough already.


Apr 21, 2016
Bluffton, SC
A cuckold is simply "a wife who has sex with others". Humiliation, chastity, etc are subsets. You say you're not a cuckold, actually you are by definition and act that way by (subset - a level deep) wearing a pink chastity device.

The problem is that what you and her didn't envision is the same man over and over will cause a connection, which turned to love. The heart wants what the heart wants, love is an uncontrollable emotion.

She's given him her heart, her love, her body, her emotions. What do you get? You get to be chaste, to pay the bills, to provide for THEM. If that works for you then all is good.
  • Like
Reactions: MrandMrsG