Ladies, have you ever cheated/had an affair behind your husband’s back?

My wife KK does not participate in this forum, but I can, as proxy provide some insight into this topic.

KK has never been happily monogamous, even from the time we were just dating. She engaged in numerous infidelities throughout our relationship, from one-night stands to more complex, traditional affairs that had interwoven emotional and financial components. What that context:

1. With whom and for how long did the affair last? What were your ages?

KK’s first excursion (that I know about) after we got married took place about six months in. It was more a series of events than actual affair. She was working an interim job with a real-estate agency - started fucking her boss. It lasted about a year, until she left the company for more suitable work in line with her career interests.

2. How did the affair start? What made you cross the line into a sexual relationship?

As I understand things, my role was influencing KK via pillow-talk during sex. I was suggesting that she have sex with strangers, fuck other men, encouraging the idea. I had no real idea she would do it, and it took a shape I did not expect - cheating instead of involving me…

I was also triggering another issue - at the time, we were still “young and poor,” and I’d just started grad school. I made the mistake of complaining about KK’s spending habits on clothes and shoes. Her wealthy, suave, experienced boss was able to use her material interests to seduce her.

3. Did you use condoms during sex or did you have unprotected sex?

Their sex was bareback - completely unprotected. Fortunately KK was using birth control pills at that time, otherwise she’d almost certainly have gotten pregnant.

4. Did you have sex with your husband during the time you were having sex with your lover and did you feel guilty?

After the fact, KK told me that she was only having sex with me at that time *because* she felt guilty...

5. Did your husband find out and how? His reaction?

I found out. But I chose not to confront her. I was at first jealous, angry, terrified, ashamed, and conflicted. I was also fascinated by the situation, aroused by it, obsessed with it.

6. Did the affair end your marriage or make it stronger?

I can’t assess this with any honest answer. In the short term, it was painful. In the long term, given our situation, it made things stronger. We are still married, coming up on 45 years, having survived numerous infidelities on both sides...

7. If you stayed together, have you cheated on him again secretly?

I know of at least two dozen other affairs besides KK’s first. The ones I know about being key… she still has her secrets.. Even though we’ve been doing the hot wife thing more than twenty years, she still secretly fucks a guy if that’s what she wants to do...
 
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At least you made her cum! My first husbands idea of sex was plugging away with his little dick for a couple of minutes, cumming, then rolling over and going to sleep. I’d just be warming up and he’d already be finished!
If my first wasn't dead due to his alocholism and unmanaged diabetes, I'd SWEAR we married the same idiot!! LOL Mine told me I read too many stories and I was oversexed and expected too much from sex!! Never once had an orgasm DURING sex with him. And guys wonder why they remain Incels, LOLLOL. J (the wife)
 
If my first wasn't dead due to his alocholism and unmanaged diabetes, I'd SWEAR we married the same idiot!! LOL Mine told me I read too many stories and I was oversexed and expected too much from sex!! Never once had an orgasm DURING sex with him. And guys wonder why they remain Incels, LOLLOL. J (the wife)
Haha. Mine is still very much alive and re-married. Happily apparently. I’m not in touch with him but our daughter is. Like yours, he never made me cum and we were married 20 years!
 
1. With whom and for how long did the affair last? What were your ages?
Many of my affairs started out behind my husbands back. We tried planned meetings with guys, but I hated that and virtually ALL of them lied about something: smoking, drugs, ability, cock size (some of you guys measure from back behind your balls!! Do you REALLY think women don't know the difference behind 4" and 9"?!?!). Discovered quite by accident that I enjoyed having affairs with guys I got to know first as friends, usually from work, and friendships developed in to affairs. Most of those were "behind hubbys back" initially. Some were intentionally behind his back because I knew he would not like the guys. So I did "cheat" even though he was OK with me having Lovers, he didn't know about some of them right away.
My longest affair was with my Boss/Lover, it lasted 11 years and only ended over the pandemic. He got REALLY weird about it. Most of them were 3-6 months. Mostly co-workers or guys I met as a result of work.

2. How did the affair start? What made you cross the line into a sexual relationship?
First one was a guy that kept showing up at work when it wasn't necessary, and it became obvious he was making a point to see me. I was infatuated with that. Hadn;t even happened before. I told hubby about it, and he encouraged me to go along with it and see where it goes. So the decision to let it become sexual was pre-determined. I started dressing sexier, making time to spend time with him outside work, basically threw myself at him and he FINALLY kissed me one evening and WOW!! Fun hot sexy 6 month affair was the result and really only ended because his wife started asking about all the overtime he was suddenly working. If he called me today, we could start right back up where we left off as far as I am concerned.

3. Did you use condoms during sex or did you have unprotected sex?
I hate condoms (except with my husband), so that was never a consideration. I use a diaphragm for birth control, can't take the pill, and frequently forego the diaphragm because I track my fertile times closely. I enjoy the discussion with potential Lovers about "protection" and pregnancy and I let them know I enjoy pregnancy risk encounters and would expect nothing from them if a pregnancy happened. It really ramps up the excitement of the affair too. They think I am having an affair with them because I am not sexually satisfied at home (I don't tell them my husband knows), AND I am also willing to risk a pregnancy because I want the sex with them that badly!! More often than not, we end up not using my diaphragm at all and have a LOT of fun discussing a possible pregnancy!!

4. Did you have sex with your husband during the time you were having sex with your lover and did you feel guilty?

I do in most cases. But with my husband, since November of 2012, he wears a condom and I use my diaphragm to make SURE I don't get pregnant by him again. We have made the decision that my next poregnancy WILL be with someone other than him. We don't have actual intercourse much either, maybe a half dozen times a year (pre-pandemic, its more often since the pandemic like once a month since I have no other sexual outlet), most of the time he cums while I jerk him off with a condom on while telling him about my latest sexual escapades, or more recently about our fantasies about how I end up pregnant since I am not active outside the marriage since the pandemic. That is once or twice a week. He actully prefers being jerked off, he lasts much longer as I control his release, and we do it more often than intercourse.
A couple times, I have agreed to be completely faithful sexually to a Lover, and hubby has been ok with that and supportive. I just increase the times I jerked him off, or sent him to the bathroom by himself to "take care of that". Not for everyone, but we enjoy all of this.

5. Did your husband find out and how? His reaction?

He isn't dumb (retired medical professional), so he suspected most of my affairs before I admitted them, if I was hiding it. With my Boss/Lover, we were involved for 2 years before I actually TOLD hubby about it. And when I did, it was for two reasons: we had decided we wanted to be full time anytime Lovers (Boss/lover and I) and I knew I would need hubbys cooperation so I could see my Boss/lover frequently at home too, but more importantly I had come home from a 4 day celebration trip to Cancun with my Boss/lover to celebrate our decision, and there was a GOOD chance I had come home PREGNANT!! I assumed that his reaction, an unexpeted cum flying EVERYWHERE orgasm while I was jerking him without a condom on with NO intention of him cumming, was approval of my indiscretions again!! LOL

6. Did the affair end your marriage or make it stronger?

All of them made it stronger, and one probably saved the marriage. We had REALLY drifted apart, but a crazy night out to a strip club in Florida with a co-worker resulted in a 4 AM call to hubby while still quite drunk to talk to him about my CRAZY night and for whatever reason, that pulled us back together and reignited whatever we had lost. Nothing much really happened with that guy, except a LOT of trying on my part to make something happen which we both (hubby and I) enjoyed sharing and it eventually came out he was gay and the reason he hit on anything with a vagina was to try to hide that!! LOL Explained why he was SO FOCUSED on my ass only, and worse, he had a little peepee!! LOL Only felt it hard once, whe he was talking about bending me iver a sink and fucking me in the ass, and I remember thinking "its like a little boys!!" I found out that people that use drugs remember a LOT of things that NEVER happened sexually, and brag about it!! LOL He had a serious coke habit too.

7. If you stayed together, have you cheated on him again secretly?

We have, and I have. And I probably will again. For me, some of my relationships are "special" and not something I want to share sexually with anyone. And a couple are/were with guys he would not approve of me being with, so I kept tham to myself. And some of the things I did with/for Lovers I kept to myself too. Mostly because I only did them FOR my Lovers, not really because I want to reproduce them with hubby, even though he would like to do so. Women will understand this better than guys....you just think with your hard cocks. I have a submissive side with Lovers too.

J (the wife)
J (the wife);

nice recap, BTW. how do you manage to keep all that activity secret? some affairs seem very passionate in frequency & intensity.
are you just assuming hubby didn't know or are you sure he didn't know about the ones you were hiding?
 
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J (the wife);

nice rtecap, BTW. how do you manage to keep all that activity secret? some affairs seem very passionate in frequency & intensity.
are you just assuming hubby didn't know or are you sure he didn't know about the ones you were hiding?
Almost every affair I had with a married woman started with at least one encounter behind her husband’s back. But eventually every knew. Most were made to watch. A couple of them were set up by the husband.
 
My ex and I played as a couple in the lifestyle for years then we kind of cooled it until the internet, around the mid 90's.
We would still go to a lifestyle club every now and then, occasionally find a couple to play with.
We began using the internet and we would play online, of course she had a lot more action than I did. She had internet boyfriends and they would exchange photos, sexy chat but never any real thoughts of getting together with anyone. Although we had been with multiple couples over the years we had never talked about partying separate for each other.
It all started one morning when I headed to work, I had forgotten some papers I needed for a presentation so I head back home to pick them up. To my surprise when I got home was her car was still in the drive, figured she would have been gone by now to get to work herself. I walked into the dark house and could hear sounds from the office, as I got closer I could hear her talking to someone on the computer, so I stopped to listen for a bit.
She was talking to someone I had not heard of before, turns out it was someone she met online, named Vinnie. We were in NorCal at the time and he was living in Reno, I found out later. They were talking about getting together. When I entered the room she had a pic of him nude on the screen and she was using her toy, legs spread wide and feet up against the desk, she was pounding her pussy with the toy. I made my presents clear and she turned off the screen, pull the toy from her pussy and just began to stammer. Was quite a lovely site with the Vinnie's pic up and her toy sticking out of her pussy.
She said they had met a number of weeks back and that she had met on the site we played on . Said they had just recently began playing online and said she was having fun with him. I did not say that I had heard them discussing getting together. Later that evening after we went to bed she fucked my brains out. Since I went to work very early in the morning I got up early and I got on the computer logged in as her, he was there and tried to make contact. I paid on attention and was reading some of their post to each other and it gave me a big hardon.
A few weeks past and she said that her and some of her GF's were going to Vegas to party. She knew I had a golf tourney the weekend they planned to go so I said sure y'all have fun. I went back online a few days after and sure enough i read where she and Vinnie planned on getting together, so she was not going to Vegas with GF's but instead headed to Reno to see him.
When we were seeing couples together we would get home and share what we did with our partners, talk about the goods and the bads.
When she returned from her trip she had a elaborate tell of her trip with the girls. I did not tell her what I knew to not cause an altercation with her. Over the next few weeks I ask her how she and Vinnie were getting along, she said all was good and I said you should ask him to come here and the two of them could play. Her eyes got real big and she became all aglow, "really, you would not mind if we did not play as a couple". I said sure that's fine, it would be better than if you seeked off to see him elsewhere, I hid my smile. I said and if you like I will stay away while he is here.
That weekend she said he had agreed to come to our place and would be there the following weekend. That week we were making love and she started crying, I ask what was wrong and she said she felt terrible, "I cheated on you, did not tell you the truth, then she confessed about Reno." I said I sort of figured that but that I did not mind and that I loved her and just wanted her to be happy. She ask if I would stay home when Vinnie came and that maybe the two of us could play with her. I was totally up for that.
She was all excited on Saturday morning, she had different outfits laid out an was trying on different outfits and shoes trying to find the perfect combo. We met Vinnie that evening at a restaurant, had a few drinks, dinner and then went to the lifestyle club for more drinks. She was in high heaven, as we entered she held both of our hands as we entered, and how sexy she looked, short shirt that buttoned up the front and she had all but the top button undone just enough to see the bottom of her panties bare midriff and top that buttoned but of course it was unbutton all but the bottom button, showing her tits to the world. We all dance, had a few drinks and decided to head home, we left the way we entered with her clinging to the two of us.
When we arrived home I was making us some drinks and they went to the living room. When I came in they were kissing and he had his hand up her skirt. I sat in a chair facing them just watching and getting hard. She said come join them but I said I am enjoying watching so they continued. After a bit she stood removed her skirt and top and was standing there in just her heels and thigh highs. Man she look gorgeous. She took Vinnies hand a helped him up and she sat back down and began to undress him. Wow did that Italian have a cock, I am 6 plus and fat, he was at least 8 to 9 inches and very fat. She sat down next to him and as he played with her tits she began stroking him, then went down on him. I took a few pics of them and she got up and ok boys let's go to the bedroom and see what mischief we can get into. We got to the bedroom and the two of them got on the bed and began making out. She ask if I was going to join them and I said no just going to take a couple of pics then leave the two of them to play alone. She smiled and said that is why she loved me. I took a few pics and then she crawled on top of him grabbed him and guided him into her. I about cum when she began sliding down his shaft and bottoming out, taking his big cock all the deep in her pussy. She was in a daze, her eyes glazed over, so I walked over and gave her a big kiss and exited the room.
She and Vinnie got together a few times a month for almost a year. She came to me one day and said that she was not seeing him anymore because he had become to serious, wanted her to leave me.
We began playing as a couple again and she had two more single lovers over the next two years. Then one day she just said she did not want to play anymore, so we quit. All was good for about two years, our sex together was as good as ever and everything seemed fine. I noticed she was not trying to make herself appealing and that she would pull away when I tried to snuggle and initiate sex. I ask what was wrong and it was always nothing is wrong. It got to the point that I almost had to demand sex from her. This went on for 3 years, maybe sex 10 times during that period. She said she had lost all desire but if I wanted she would have sex.
I suggest we seek counselling and she refused. A few months passed and she told me that if I wanted sex I should get a GF or hooker. That did not sit well with me and I told her that if that was her attitude then maybe we should separate. We did and after about 6 months we decided to divorce.
As far as I know she has not had a date since we divorced. I even called Vinnie and told him we had divorce, he was all excited. He called me back about 3 weeks later, said he had talked to her a few times and that she did not want to have anything to do with him.

Then I met CC, introduced her to the lifestyle and we have been playing with couple ever since. Can't wait till we can play again.

I consider myself a lucky man to of had both of these ladies in my life and that they loved to be shared.
 
I had a bunch of affairs behind my husbands back just because I love sex. He always found out and we would have a big fight, but stay together. Eventually, I found he was getting turned on, so I did it more and more and made sure he would catch me. It led to a great life as a hotwife.
This is so wonderful to hear. More and more wives should take control of their sex life in this manner. This is what my mother did.
 
I agree 100%.
I think all good Bull's try and find recently married women to make sure they cheat in the first 3 months. So they can break that crazy social idea that they are suppose to be "faithful". Yes, of course their husband should be. God knows their average dicks should be kept in their pants. But a married woman once she cheats experiences that marriage doesn't mean lack of freedom, but that she can experience both the pleasure of big cocked fit men while having the devotion of her husband.
 
I cheated on my first husband constantly for all but the first couple of years of our marriage. We were married 20 years. He got what he needed sexually within our marriage, I didn’t so I got it elsewhere.
Lynn x
Good for you, you show the pride of an independent woman and I think that's beautiful. My wife cheated on me with a better man. My personal pride as a man took a licking but my wife got something I couldn't give, she loved cheating on me, and in the end I'm thankful for his being the real man my wife needed. I think the humility of a better man seeding my wife's womb behind my back and my wife loving it, put me profoundly in my place. Good for you for living your life to the fullest, you deserve it. I hope the man you cheated with was better than your husband also.