Like you we too have been in this lifestyle for a few years now, and we have had a very similar experience, at first it was extremely intense, wife needed to reassured that everything would be fine, then she would throw up before going on a date and sex, a couple of last minute cold feet. Now it is very normal for my wife to say that she is getting her boyfriend over for the night after drinks, so could I get home early from from work and check if the house is reasonably clean and to change the sheets in the guest bedroom, but the excitement is still there.
One of her regular boyfriends and I get on very well, and he will call me if she did not reply or check if he can take her out. But I still get weak at the knees when I see them kissing and I watch them once in a while having sex, and the most intense moment is when he comes inside her, she will lock her legs behind him and raise her hips to keep his sperm inside.
