Anyone start out with voyerism/exhibitionism?

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So after lots and lots of talking I think my wife and I are going to a swingers club to just watch or be watched. Anyone else start this way? Where did it eventually lead?

My wife is very vanilla and I am more kinky. We both are unsure about actually sharing her (even if she fully and truly wants to) and thought this would be a safe way to experience the "lifestyle." However, she doesnt like being the center of attention so has some reservations. My wife also needs (and is also made uncomfortable by this) an emotional connection with the person she is having sex with. Though she has also said she can have just sex for the sake of just having sex. I want her to act like a slut but I respect her for not actually being a slut. I would have never married her if she was. When I fantasize about her having sex with someone I get turned on but then also think that my wife is special to me, the mother of my kids, and do I really want someone I dont really know fucking her. Maybe if it was a friend or someone we knew it would be better but on the otherhand it would be weird too.

This is really confusing. Any insight?
 
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So after lots and lots of talking I think my wife and I are going to a swingers club to just watch or be watched. Anyone else start this way? Where did it eventually lead?

My wife is very vanilla and I am more kinky. We both are unsure about actually sharing her (even if she fully and truly wants to) and thought this would be a safe way to experience the "lifestyle." However, she doesnt like being the center of attention so has some reservations. My wife also needs (and is also made uncomfortable by this) an emotional connection with the person she is having sex with. Though she has also said she can have just sex for the sake of just having sex. I want her to act like a slut but I respect her for not actually being a slut. I would have never married her if she was. When I fantasize about her having sex with someone I get turned on but then also think that my wife is special to me, the mother of my kids, and do I really want someone I dont really know fucking her. Maybe if it was a friend or someone we knew it would be better but on the otherhand it would be weird too.

This is really confusing. Any insight?
Yes it is confusing. I think you and her are confusing sex with love. Sex is a physical act, love is an emotional act. You also use the term slut in a derogatorily, then want her to be a slut. I think before you embark you might need an attitude adjustment. Hotwifing, sharing, cuckolding isn't for everybody, it might not be for you.
 
Yes it is confusing. I think you and her are confusing sex with love. Sex is a physical act, love is an emotional act. You also use the term slut in a derogatorily, then want her to be a slut. I think before you embark you might need an attitude adjustment. Hotwifing, sharing, cuckolding isn't for everybody, it might not be for you.
I think you are correct. Perhaps the term "sexually expressive" would be better for us than slut. I have also been thinking that maybe an option with lower stakes would be some soft play or maybe my wife giving me and another guy a hand or blow job at the same time. There wouldnt be emotional attachment like with PIV sex
 
I think you are correct. Perhaps the term "sexually expressive" would be better for us than slut. I have also been thinking that maybe an option with lower stakes would be some soft play or maybe my wife giving me and another guy a hand or blow job at the same time. There wouldnt be emotional attachment like with PIV sex
My hotwife passed away 2 years ago I now have a LF that is a 'hotwife'. If you'd like to chat about the LS lets do so privately.
 
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We have actually been thinking of doing that to get started, either at a swingers club or just having sex in the same room/bed with another couple
Yes. There is on some nights, single guys at swinger clubs that the wife could experiment with, try giving and receiving oral, etc to see how it goes. I know others start by visiting adult theatres, etc. Again the question is "Getting started at what".
 
So after lots and lots of talking I think my wife and I are going to a swingers club to just watch or be watched. Anyone else start this way? Where did it eventually lead?

My wife is very vanilla and I am more kinky. We both are unsure about actually sharing her (even if she fully and truly wants to) and thought this would be a safe way to experience the "lifestyle." However, she doesnt like being the center of attention so has some reservations. My wife also needs (and is also made uncomfortable by this) an emotional connection with the person she is having sex with. Though she has also said she can have just sex for the sake of just having sex. I want her to act like a slut but I respect her for not actually being a slut. I would have never married her if she was. When I fantasize about her having sex with someone I get turned on but then also think that my wife is special to me, the mother of my kids, and do I really want someone I dont really know fucking her. Maybe if it was a friend or someone we knew it would be better but on the otherhand it would be weird too.

This is really confusing. Any insight?
My wife is the same way.once I get her going she can be very wild and kinky, at home. In public she is very reserved and shy. I've started opening her up a bit by buying her sexy clothes, encouraging her to go braless, which a few years ago she wouldn't even dream of. Always complement her when she wears something sexy. Suggest things to wear, don't push. I'm with you about not knowing how it would feel the first time of it happens. But I get really horny and hard at the thought of it. Also begin bringing in a fantasy third person when your having sex in the safety of your home. Again don't push or get mad, it takes time for women to feel comfortable showing their slutty side, especially to their husbands.
 
We started off with a cam and the anonymity of the old yahoo groups. But going to a swingers club is a great idea to get started. In most such clubs they have a secret word which basically means "No" and that will help her ward off others. Many start off like this and have what they term as SRSP meaning same room same person. Stay with hubby but get turned on by others. A couple of visits later and once she feels that "everybody is doing it", she will also join in . Good luck
 
hi from long island new york my husband and i meet others into same room sex exhibitionism toys safe things i am bi he is not we meet a lot at nude is ok beaches or hotel with safe people i have been a exhibitionist for most of my life not shy like to be nude at safe clubs or partys were my husband and i both feel safe kinky be kinky with some if its safe my husband likes showing me with doctor tools that you can see inside most people we meet never see that
 

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We went to a swingers resort, had great time. We even played with each other in the main playroom. There were other people there, but we stayed to ourselves. It was a fun time and somethi6that will happen again. we did get hit on by some single guys, but we were not interested
 
We host dinner parties at neutral venues for couples, especially newbies, with games and things to help couples explore their kinks without overwhelmed too quickly. If you feel there’s a need and a market in your area or country for entry level events like this I’d be interested to know
 
So after lots and lots of talking I think my wife and I are going to a swingers club to just watch or be watched. Anyone else start this way? Where did it eventually lead?

My wife is very vanilla and I am more kinky. We both are unsure about actually sharing her (even if she fully and truly wants to) and thought this would be a safe way to experience the "lifestyle." However, she doesnt like being the center of attention so has some reservations. My wife also needs (and is also made uncomfortable by this) an emotional connection with the person she is having sex with. Though she has also said she can have just sex for the sake of just having sex. I want her to act like a slut but I respect her for not actually being a slut. I would have never married her if she was. When I fantasize about her having sex with someone I get turned on but then also think that my wife is special to me, the mother of my kids, and do I really want someone I dont really know fucking her. Maybe if it was a friend or someone we knew it would be better but on the otherhand it would be weird too.

This is really confusing. Any insight?
I just posted one relating to this subject in another thread.
Yes the first steps are the game plays ie True dare, strip games or forfiet games (me and my exwife used to love playing forfeit snakes and ladders lol). Then as you progress into the swing world you are already into showing others what you have to offer. The first time I took my exgf in to a swing club it was to show her what was possible. In her mind she had fantastic thoughts, but she never realised she could put them into a reality scenario. That first "taster" of the swing club ended up with me, her and another 3 guys that she had dragged into one of the sex rooms
So go for it
 
You need to start where she’s at. What’s a fun, comfortable step you can take with her? What‘s in her imagination?
Role play? Dirty talk? Watch porn together?

As for your thing about valuing her for not being slutty, you need to figure out what that is and let it go. Because, if you actually ever get to a place where she is freed to enjoy sex, it will likely get slutty. And you cannot judge her for that. You encouraged it.
 
Once she admitted it, I began to pack her sexy things to wear. At first she said she just liked being nude. I started telling her how it would be better for her admirers if she dressed up. Finally she relented.
Wifey actually loves sharing her sexy body with sexy young hung black men.
 

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So after lots and lots of talking I think my wife and I are going to a swingers club to just watch or be watched. Anyone else start this way? Where did it eventually lead?

My wife is very vanilla and I am more kinky. We both are unsure about actually sharing her (even if she fully and truly wants to) and thought this would be a safe way to experience the "lifestyle." However, she doesnt like being the center of attention so has some reservations. My wife also needs (and is also made uncomfortable by this) an emotional connection with the person she is having sex with. Though she has also said she can have just sex for the sake of just having sex. I want her to act like a slut but I respect her for not actually being a slut. I would have never married her if she was. When I fantasize about her having sex with someone I get turned on but then also think that my wife is special to me, the mother of my kids, and do I really want someone I dont really know fucking her. Maybe if it was a friend or someone we knew it would be better but on the otherhand it would be weird too.

This is really confusing. Any insight?
My story exactly right here. The need for an emotional connection is why my wife won't allow herself to be shared.