I’m wondering how many do help their spouse or partner pick out new people for her to fuck. My wife and I have been in this lifestyle for twenty years. Most of it in the closet and not many at all knew we were into this lifestyle. We would travel out of the area and make arrangements to be around others with the same mindset and hook up with different people during this. When it first started it was a couple times a year but soon became something we did every couple of months. We found that was not even enough and things progressed to where we feel comfortable in our area to be selective and find guys that are both discrete but also polite and understand the rules. Meaning be mature and not acting crazy and talking about all this with others. Most men my wife hooks up with are married as well and some have wives that know what’s going on and others do not. But back to helping her find new lovers. I meet new people all the time and can size them up fairly quickly. I mention this to my wife and next thing that happens is we are meeting up with this person, generally somewhere public and have some drinks together. This generally leads to them and my wife planning something together. Something as simple as a dinner and date night and see where it goes. This seems to be my wife’s favorite. Reminds her of her youth and just having fun. This really does add a spark to her after these dates, makes her feel alive and wanted. This is really I believe what most women want, to be desired and pampered. I know with my wife she becomes super horny when this happens and generally this last for days on end. So me finding new guys for her is both fun and rewarding. My question I guess is this, how many others in this lifestyle find this to be the case? If not, why not? The reward is greater than you can imagine if done properly.
Do you help your wife pick out a new lover?
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I have a very similar process with my wife. Makes sense to get a second opinion.
Very much so. We use to question ourselves in the beginning. Not so much now.
We date a potential lover, my husband is there and we get to know a guy before we have sex.
In today’s world this is smart!
That's just it I don't want to just fuck anyone.
I can’t agree more with that!! Last thing you want is something you can’t get rid of. Meaning a disease. We are pretty open about being checked out and not causing ourselves or anyone else a problem. We expect the same.
You can learn a lot over dinner and phone conversations, not all of the men we dated ended up in a hotel room with me, plus my husband tends to be in the room the first couple of encounters we have.
We’ve done the same thing. But sometimes we just know everything is going to be ok so my wife goes alone occasionally.
Sometime I do go out on my own but mostly we play together.
Sean here. It's pretty much up to me for to find our guests. After nearly 30 years of sharing I know what she will say yes to. It begins with an exploratory email and and introduction. Based on the response we will do a zoom or ... call just to break the ice. If all goes well with that we will do a second call to schedule the meetup. Jennifer is present on both calls. Finally we meet for drinks or coffee to see if the vibe is actually there. If that goes well Jennifer will excuse herself to go get ready. I'll have a short conversation with our guest going over the rules we play by on last time. Once he enters the room our unwritten rule is that Jennifer fucks him.
Sounds like you have a method that works for you both. Keep it up if it’s working well for you. We have and no regrets.
This is why it amazes me when single guys hit us up and assume my wife will fuck them with no prior contact
One of my favorite topics, as well as introspective assessment…
We just crossed the 22nd ‘hot wife’ transition anniversary. Over the long haul, I estimate I’ve been directly involved in recruiting about 70% of KK’s encounter partners. Could be less, maybe more, but I think that’s an objective estimate.
Of that, the curve has certainly shifted over time, and within the dynamic of the situation - when KK was in “cock crazy” mode, she was probably doing 90% or more of finding fuck buddies.
We’re now in a sort of hybrid poly thing. I introduced KK to two of the current three “regular,” and live-in boyfriends - Andy, and Paul. David’s been hers all along.
Paul is younger, recently nineteen… he has friends in the same age group, who are enthusiastic about getting to fuck a mature woman. KK gets them very spun-up, which makes up (most of the time) for their inexperience.
Outside our weird little circle, I’m probably doing most of the “external guy” recruiting. Before the pandemic thing, KK was all about cock variety. I’m still trying to keep things fresh by finding one or two new guys to entertain her.
We just crossed the 22nd ‘hot wife’ transition anniversary. Over the long haul, I estimate I’ve been directly involved in recruiting about 70% of KK’s encounter partners. Could be less, maybe more, but I think that’s an objective estimate.
Of that, the curve has certainly shifted over time, and within the dynamic of the situation - when KK was in “cock crazy” mode, she was probably doing 90% or more of finding fuck buddies.
We’re now in a sort of hybrid poly thing. I introduced KK to two of the current three “regular,” and live-in boyfriends - Andy, and Paul. David’s been hers all along.
Paul is younger, recently nineteen… he has friends in the same age group, who are enthusiastic about getting to fuck a mature woman. KK gets them very spun-up, which makes up (most of the time) for their inexperience.
Outside our weird little circle, I’m probably doing most of the “external guy” recruiting. Before the pandemic thing, KK was all about cock variety. I’m still trying to keep things fresh by finding one or two new guys to entertain her.
I follow the theme here, my wife had two lovers early in our marriage, then chose to show me her second as he "seduced" her for my benefit so she could gauge my reaction. The first was her driving instructor and the second my then best friend so she knew them both well before commencing an affair with them.
So i knew she liked an experienced lover and had desires and needs far above my ability so i became her cuck husband.
Would she take another lover? well she is 6ft, slim, outgoing, popular and openly confident and the life and sole of any party and often chatted up, but NO she refuses to take another lover, prefering me to source future candidates for her. I later shared her in a threesome with another friend of mine but he was a poor lover and she said she would prefer someone we didnt know.
So i have over the years spend hours sorting through posts and messages for suitable men, then putting the final one or two to her. She always acts as if she is reluctant, having agreed i should look, but will meet them.. "for me". This has reduced the numbers as many men whilst wanting a fuck or affair are put off by the appearance of a 6ft 4 male and some find it strange that her husband, a dominant alpha male is basically bringing his wife to them.
I always leave them for a bit to have a chat but have often been asked when she left to powder her nose:
"do you really want to do this? you dont look the sort...which one of you wanst to do this", often followed by, if she was my wife i wouldnt. Demonstrating they are unaware of our sexual dynamics, we are both very dominant characters in normal life, yet both sexual submissives.
As reluctant as she has always presented to me it is me thats more nervous meeting chaps, in 9.5 out of 10 i have chosen well as she has then gone on to have a relationship with them.
I have become used to her reluctance then with 20 mins be sat there watching this man kissing or stoking her legs then going back to the car for more. On the way home i just ask: would you like to see him again if she says yes or what do you think then the answer is yes, so i arrange with him a hotel we all know why.
The only thing i have never managed: is for her to pick herself another lover. Over the years she has quite a few times commented a bloke tried to chat her up even in supermarkets and she shut has him down immediately, yet had she met that same man in a pub arranged by me it probably would have resulted in a different answer.
Thankfully she likes long term lovers so i have sourced men that she has become involved with over many years so my searches are not that common.
So i knew she liked an experienced lover and had desires and needs far above my ability so i became her cuck husband.
Would she take another lover? well she is 6ft, slim, outgoing, popular and openly confident and the life and sole of any party and often chatted up, but NO she refuses to take another lover, prefering me to source future candidates for her. I later shared her in a threesome with another friend of mine but he was a poor lover and she said she would prefer someone we didnt know.
So i have over the years spend hours sorting through posts and messages for suitable men, then putting the final one or two to her. She always acts as if she is reluctant, having agreed i should look, but will meet them.. "for me". This has reduced the numbers as many men whilst wanting a fuck or affair are put off by the appearance of a 6ft 4 male and some find it strange that her husband, a dominant alpha male is basically bringing his wife to them.
I always leave them for a bit to have a chat but have often been asked when she left to powder her nose:
"do you really want to do this? you dont look the sort...which one of you wanst to do this", often followed by, if she was my wife i wouldnt. Demonstrating they are unaware of our sexual dynamics, we are both very dominant characters in normal life, yet both sexual submissives.
As reluctant as she has always presented to me it is me thats more nervous meeting chaps, in 9.5 out of 10 i have chosen well as she has then gone on to have a relationship with them.
I have become used to her reluctance then with 20 mins be sat there watching this man kissing or stoking her legs then going back to the car for more. On the way home i just ask: would you like to see him again if she says yes or what do you think then the answer is yes, so i arrange with him a hotel we all know why.
The only thing i have never managed: is for her to pick herself another lover. Over the years she has quite a few times commented a bloke tried to chat her up even in supermarkets and she shut has him down immediately, yet had she met that same man in a pub arranged by me it probably would have resulted in a different answer.
Thankfully she likes long term lovers so i have sourced men that she has become involved with over many years so my searches are not that common.
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Yes - in the most recent nine-day interval when I was traveling, Andy, David, Paul, and two of Paul's young friends spent an entire day banging KK. They were going to have a sixth, but he for some reason missed out. So did I...
In the beginning of our Hotwife LS I picked out all of the men at my wife's insistance. She agreed to have sex with another man and me but he had to be a man she did not know. After a screening meeting with a man I would invite him to meet us in a bar or restaurant, My wife had to feel some kind of chemistry and could say no. Worked for us until she gained enough confidence to find a man by herself
As a Bull, I prefer the husband to be very involved. Usually, my initial meetings are with the husband as it gives me an opportunity to gauge whether he is serious and ready for the lifestyle. This is very important because what they think they want and what they can do are sometimes different. On two occasions I have had wives say to me that despite him encouraging her for years she waited until she was confident he could handle it.
It gives me an opportunity to explain to him that I view us as partners in her pleasure, find out what they are looking for and make him my ally. Many first time wives are going to be hesitant and having him validate her interest in me is very helpful.
It gives me an opportunity to explain to him that I view us as partners in her pleasure, find out what they are looking for and make him my ally. Many first time wives are going to be hesitant and having him validate her interest in me is very helpful.
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