Unsure what I want ?

[Coffeebean91]

Bit of an unusual one, but looking for advice. I mentioned to my GF (32), that my fantasy was a MFM. She was okay with it, we chatted about hotwifing etc. I set up an account in fab swingers, chatted to some guys. Then we kinda pulled back. I love watching hotwife porn, I'm definitely not a cuck, not in the humiliation or cages or anything like that, and I make my GF cum every time, I'm fairly big. But I still find the idea of watching her with someone else hot, I like the slutty naughty side of it. If we do any dirty talk relating to sharing during the deed I cum super quick. Now my issue is the post nut, I then have shame. I'm not looking at pursuing a meet but should I stop watching hotwife porn etc.
For context if I pushed it my GF would do it, for me. But she's not really wanting to, but she does seem wet when we've talked about it during sex. And recently when I said her pussy
was made for being a hotwife, she said would you like that, then what would you like to see.

 

[ChubbyGermany]

we are about 95 % in the same boat

 

[BEM35]

Share a picture of her and see how that feels knowing cocks are getting hard looking at her.

 

[Coffeebean91]

Share a picture of her and see how that feels knowing cocks are getting hard looking at her.

I've actually done that on Reddit on had like, comments and messages all in the vain of I'd fuck her, she saw this too

 

[BEM35]

You won’t be satisfied until you see another cock in her.

 

[Coffeebean91]

You won’t be satisfied until you see another cock in her.

Is this speaking from experience ?

 

[BEM35]

Is this speaking from experience ?

No, just from reading your post. I have participated in MMF, if you can keep jealousy out of it you will dig it.

 

[Shadowstalker]

Bit of an unusual one, but looking for advice. I mentioned to my GF (32), that my fantasy was a MFM. She was okay with it, we chatted about hotwifing etc. I set up an account in fab swingers, chatted to some guys. Then we kinda pulled back. I love watching hotwife porn, I'm definitely not a cuck, not in the humiliation or cages or anything like that, and I make my GF cum every time, I'm fairly big. But I still find the idea of watching her with someone else hot, I like the slutty naughty side of it. If we do any dirty talk relating to sharing during the deed I cum super quick. Now my issue is the post nut, I then have shame. I'm not looking at pursuing a meet but should I stop watching hotwife porn etc.
For context if I pushed it my GF would do it, for me. But she's not really wanting to, but she does seem wet when we've talked about it during sex. And recently when I said her pussy
was made for being a hotwife, she said would you like that, then what would you like to see.

This sounds just like me 🙈😅... We are talking about trying dogging out when the weather improves... Just start off other people watching us in the car

 

[wmbnuts]

Bit of an unusual one, but looking for advice. I mentioned to my GF (32), that my fantasy was a MFM. She was okay with it, we chatted about hotwifing etc. I set up an account in fab swingers, chatted to some guys. Then we kinda pulled back. I love watching hotwife porn, I'm definitely not a cuck, not in the humiliation or cages or anything like that, and I make my GF cum every time, I'm fairly big. But I still find the idea of watching her with someone else hot, I like the slutty naughty side of it. If we do any dirty talk relating to sharing during the deed I cum super quick. Now my issue is the post nut, I then have shame. I'm not looking at pursuing a meet but should I stop watching hotwife porn etc.
For context if I pushed it my GF would do it, for me. But she's not really wanting to, but she does seem wet when we've talked about it during sex. And recently when I said her pussy
was made for being a hotwife, she said would you like that, then what would you like to see.

You spoke with her about your fantasy, now, let her free, don't ask her anything, don't push her, let her take control... and maybe you will have a good surprise.

 

[InvisibleVoyeur]

It sounds like you might be a stag, not a cuck. Even so, it sounds life you've posted pics of her for other men to enjoy, and that it was good for you. If you want to have a pseudo sharing experience, try finding someone to chat with (here, on reddit, or wherever) and have fun with that. You can all three share pics back and forth, she can use a dildo or whatever, and it might help her you in that headspace without the risk of going all the way.

 

[Pipedown1984]

I wouldn't worry about what label you may or may not be. Firstly, I think it's great that you can talk about whatever kinks you have with your mrs and it not cause an issue.

It may be just the fantasy of it which gets you both there, which is totally fine. Obviously from the place you're in now to "getting someone in to rattle your mrs" isn't just one step away. For some couples it's that simple. For others, there needs to be some conversation and understanding between you both and a 3rd party. It might be interesting for you both to talk openly and see it more of a fun adventure you do together rather than a shameful taboo liason.

Always make sure you get the most out of it aswel!

 

[majorem]

Haha, you also sound like me - or me like 5 years ago. I'm into it for the same reasons - I like

Bit of an unusual one, but looking for advice. I mentioned to my GF (32), that my fantasy was a MFM. She was okay with it, we chatted about hotwifing etc. I set up an account in fab swingers, chatted to some guys. Then we kinda pulled back. I love watching hotwife porn, I'm definitely not a cuck, not in the humiliation or cages or anything like that, and I make my GF cum every time, I'm fairly big. But I still find the idea of watching her with someone else hot, I like the slutty naughty side of it. If we do any dirty talk relating to sharing during the deed I cum super quick. Now my issue is the post nut, I then have shame. I'm not looking at pursuing a meet but should I stop watching hotwife porn etc.
For context if I pushed it my GF would do it, for me. But she's not really wanting to, but she does seem wet when we've talked about it during sex. And recently when I said her pussy
was made for being a hotwife, she said would you like that, then what would you like to see.

I started out the same and, likewise, for me, its about seeing her be a dirty slut and the fact that's taboo, not about any kind of humiliation or becoming secondary.

I will say, early on, I also felt weird and some shame after cumming watching hotwife porn and then up until more recently, whenever I'd engage in the fantasy with my wife, getting her talking dirty about it, dping her with dildos, etc. I really got off on it though, so I kept watching hotwife porn / periodically engaging in fantasy talk during sex and eventually those negative feelings subside as it starts to feel more normal and your GF / wife seems into it.

I think if that's the brand of this fetish you want, where you're not into the cuck submissive aspect, it can be a bit harder to fully sign off on it yourself because you'll likely have more potential jealousy and fear of being sidelined if things got out of control or evolved beyond just a sexual encounter. I also got to a point where I think my wife basically asked me if I wanted to do this and, faced with the actual reality of making a decision, I sort of stumbled and didn't know what to say. At this point, we haven't done anything beyond exploring it as a fantasy but I think she may be ready to go further, in the right environment, if I pushed things in that direction.

And, despite what some on here will say, for many women, like my wife and probably your GF, if they're going go further, they will want to be pushed into it. I mean, not pushed like coercively, but they will want to feel like you really want this and you're the one making it happen, to help free them from fear of doing something you might not want and / or their own shame and guilt over doing something that is taboo and not socially acceptable. Some women are more direct and assertive, willing to take the lead and make things happen, especially if its something they really want / they're unsatisfied sexually. My wife can be assertive but when it comes to sex, she likes to be pursued and to feel like it is me leading her to do naughty things. Everyone has a different dynamic and I guess you just need to figure that out, as well as getting to a point where you're sure you know what you want. It certainly seems like your GF is open to it and, like my wife, gets wet talking about but is probably waiting for you to be direct and confident in what you want, and probably to take a role in making it happen.

 

[Polariodcouple]

Here is the thing , my wife has always been a head turner,she has a unique quality of being flirty,but not too flirty, but she likes me to pick her fuck buddies, and she likes me to join in.
She is a hotwife..and i'm her stag..hell of a journey

 

[Mikeq5]

You won’t be satisfied until you see another cock in her.

I certainly wasn't. It took a few attempts but was better than I'd ever imagined. I had no regrets when It finally happened

 

[Discretefun66]

Bit of an unusual one, but looking for advice. I mentioned to my GF (32), that my fantasy was a MFM. She was okay with it, we chatted about hotwifing etc. I set up an account in fab swingers, chatted to some guys. Then we kinda pulled back. I love watching hotwife porn, I'm definitely not a cuck, not in the humiliation or cages or anything like that, and I make my GF cum every time, I'm fairly big. But I still find the idea of watching her with someone else hot, I like the slutty naughty side of it. If we do any dirty talk relating to sharing during the deed I cum super quick. Now my issue is the post nut, I then have shame. I'm not looking at pursuing a meet but should I stop watching hotwife porn etc.
For context if I pushed it my GF would do it, for me. But she's not really wanting to, but she does seem wet when we've talked about it during sex. And recently when I said her pussy
was made for being a hotwife, she said would you like that, then what would you like to see.

I would say knowing if you will be "ok" with sharing other men is complicated. Even though I wanted to share my wife I admit those first few experiences I felt many mixed emotions. Everyone has an ego, and it was normal to feel jealousy, insecurity, and being uncomfortable seeing the wife with other men. However, it did not take long for me to get over these strong emotions and feelings, and today I am completely comfortable with it. Now I am very much in to sharing my wife with other men and look forward to seeing her “explore” her sexuality again and again whenever possible. I know what the wife and I do is unique and not for everyone. If you want to get the most out of an open marriage/relationship it has to be strong, built on trust, communication, openness, and you both must have the right attitude.

I have had many conversations and read a lot about what a man “is” if he gets off seeing his wife have sex with other men. Personally I think people are spending way too much time trying to define it. I used the term Alpha to describe my personality type and how my everyday behavior leans. Many times I have seen the term Cuckhold or Cuck applied to husbands in the lifestyle but I see this term describing a role the husband plays within the marriage, (especially sexually) not a personality type. Similar to how a person can be submissive or dominant depending on the situation or desire of that person and the role the wish to play. However, this is just my take on it and I think people can define their role or engage in play however they desire. Some other terms I have heard used in the lifestyle are Wifesharing, Stag, Vixen, Bull, Hotwifing, open-marriage, etc. To each their own.

You have to be the kind of husband who is willing to share his wife. Who can watch another man, a stranger, have his way with her, and be turned-on by it. My experience in this lifestyle has been awesome FOR ME, but it is definitely not for every husband. You have to keep in mind that your wife, (GF) can't be un-fucked. Once you've seen it it will be burned in your memory. Speaking for myself, I feel sharing my wife with other men has been a confidence builder in our marriage and in myself as a husband. We have a rock solid relationship and I know there is nothing another man has in his pants that is a threat to that.

 

[coastalkid]

I would say knowing if you will be "ok" with sharing other men is complicated. Even though I wanted to share my wife I admit those first few experiences I felt many mixed emotions. Everyone has an ego, and it was normal to feel jealousy, insecurity, and being uncomfortable seeing the wife with other men. However, it did not take long for me to get over these strong emotions and feelings, and today I am completely comfortable with it. Now I am very much in to sharing my wife with other men and look forward to seeing her “explore” her sexuality again and again whenever possible. I know what the wife and I do is unique and not for everyone. If you want to get the most out of an open marriage/relationship it has to be strong, built on trust, communication, openness, and you both must have the right attitude.

I have had many conversations and read a lot about what a man “is” if he gets off seeing his wife have sex with other men. Personally I think people are spending way too much time trying to define it. I used the term Alpha to describe my personality type and how my everyday behavior leans. Many times I have seen the term Cuckhold or Cuck applied to husbands in the lifestyle but I see this term describing a role the husband plays within the marriage, (especially sexually) not a personality type. Similar to how a person can be submissive or dominant depending on the situation or desire of that person and the role the wish to play. However, this is just my take on it and I think people can define their role or engage in play however they desire. Some other terms I have heard used in the lifestyle are Wifesharing, Stag, Vixen, Bull, Hotwifing, open-marriage, etc. To each their own.

You have to be the kind of husband who is willing to share his wife. Who can watch another man, a stranger, have his way with her, and be turned-on by it. My experience in this lifestyle has been awesome FOR ME, but it is definitely not for every husband. You have to keep in mind that your wife, (GF) can't be un-fucked. Once you've seen it it will be burned in your memory. Speaking for myself, I feel sharing my wife with other men has been a confidence builder in our marriage and in myself as a husband. We have a rock solid relationship and I know there is nothing another man has in his pants that is a threat to that.

I know that everyone's journey is a different one but I'd like to know how you became "completely comfortable" with your situation? What helped you get quickly over those "strong emotions and feelings"? Did your wife help you in any kind of way or were you on your own? Out of all the things you struggled with what was the most difficult thing for you to handle?

 

[coastalkid]

Haha, you also sound like me - or me like 5 years ago. I'm into it for the same reasons - I like

I started out the same and, likewise, for me, its about seeing her be a dirty slut and the fact that's taboo, not about any kind of humiliation or becoming secondary.

I will say, early on, I also felt weird and some shame after cumming watching hotwife porn and then up until more recently, whenever I'd engage in the fantasy with my wife, getting her talking dirty about it, dping her with dildos, etc. I really got off on it though, so I kept watching hotwife porn / periodically engaging in fantasy talk during sex and eventually those negative feelings subside as it starts to feel more normal and your GF / wife seems into it.

I think if that's the brand of this fetish you want, where you're not into the cuck submissive aspect, it can be a bit harder to fully sign off on it yourself because you'll likely have more potential jealousy and fear of being sidelined if things got out of control or evolved beyond just a sexual encounter. I also got to a point where I think my wife basically asked me if I wanted to do this and, faced with the actual reality of making a decision, I sort of stumbled and didn't know what to say. At this point, we haven't done anything beyond exploring it as a fantasy but I think she may be ready to go further, in the right environment, if I pushed things in that direction.

And, despite what some on here will say, for many women, like my wife and probably your GF, if they're going go further, they will want to be pushed into it. I mean, not pushed like coercively, but they will want to feel like you really want this and you're the one making it happen, to help free them from fear of doing something you might not want and / or their own shame and guilt over doing something that is taboo and not socially acceptable. Some women are more direct and assertive, willing to take the lead and make things happen, especially if its something they really want / they're unsatisfied sexually. My wife can be assertive but when it comes to sex, she likes to be pursued and to feel like it is me leading her to do naughty things. Everyone has a different dynamic and I guess you just need to figure that out, as well as getting to a point where you're sure you know what you want. It certainly seems like your GF is open to it and, like my wife, gets wet talking about but is probably waiting for you to be direct and confident in what you want, and probably to take a role in making it happen.

I highlighted the part in red because that is what sparked my interest. I believe so many of the stories here have created a stereotype of a hotwife that is meant to sensationalize the extremes to draw attention to outrageous behaviors. It is so well propagated that it is a perceived norm and therefore accepted as a natural outcome.

For some reason this shift in a wife's behavior is a staple in so many "stories". Suddenly the power exchanges and the wife places outrageous restrictions and acts with unrestrained impunity. That's where that "fear of being sidelined" comes into play. Moving from fantasy to reality (according to many stories), has a shit ton of "fine print", stuff that isn't/wasn't discussed, assumed rules and restrictions all stemming from the ubiquitous statement, "Well, you were the one that wanted this!"

These stories strike fear in the hearts of men that entertain the idea of having a hot wife. That's because these stories are meant to entertain and not divulge the true reality. Unfortunately, the "true reality" isn't entertaining enough to jack off to.

When you faced making YOUR decision all that input and knowledge your gathered influenced you. When your asked if you wanted to do this all the uncertainty of how you and your wife would respond scared you. It should. You (and me) have been conditioned to expect wife's reacting in uncharacteristic ways. That is perpetuated by these "stories" that portray wives as some sort of sexual "Dr. Jeykll and Mr. Hyde".

It'd be much more entertaining to me to learn from successful, happy couples that have made mistakes, survived them and grown a fulfilling and satisfying sex life together. Not really whacking material huh?

 

[Phun Times 727]

We have been in a MFM ,starting about 6 weeks ago when I first pitched MFM which morphed into her having a BF. We have sex with her solo and together. It has been a learning experience but I must say, she and I have been enjoying it. I watch at times, he watches at times, sometimes we both have sex with her. It has been crazy but in a good way. We keep everything friendly and above board, no need for secrets. If she asked me if she could go over there alone (which she has not) I would let her but it has been something we do together. He and I are both straight and want to keep it that way. My wife has certain preferences (no butt stuff, licking or anal) and we have been fine. My girl is very oral centric and I have benefited from that and now watching her give a long slow blowjob is amazing to watch. I let her select the guy, I am 10 years older than my wife and she is 10 years older than the BF. He is a little bit bigger without it being crazy lopsidded and given his age has stamina on his side. Good for her, she deserves it. She and I still go at it like rabbits and having him is just a new and interesting spin on things. We all like the idea of keeping this a closed circle for health reasons we are all tested so no condoms will are needed.

Its crazy but I feel like the 3 of us are living a dream right now, the guys are getting a 3 some every weekend and she is getting constant cock to the point she makes us take a break. I am putting this in the win column for now.

 

[Discretefun66]

I know that everyone's journey is a different one but I'd like to know how you became "completely comfortable" with your situation? What helped you get quickly over those "strong emotions and feelings"? Did your wife help you in any kind of way or were you on your own? Out of all the things you struggled with what was the most difficult thing for you to handle?

You are right everyone's journey is different. For me it was a number of factors. To give you some background I was in my early 30's, was divorced and had had a curiosity regarding swinging in my first marriage that did not materialize in to anything. I think it was this "curiosity" I had that led to having an open mind on the subject which in turn led to me wanting to explore the idea. As I have stated in other threads you never know for sure how you will react until in happens and you could say there is some risk, you can not un-see what you see and hear. Prior to the wife and I going down this road there was a lot of us talking about it. What it meant to her what it meant to me, how would we feel afterwards. As far as the wife helping me the answer would be yes but not directly, at least not exactly. Aside from all of the talking and assurances a big pat of my comfort level was as I mentioned the solid relationship we had. You have to have a lot of trust in each other and confidence in one another as partners.

To a certain extent you have to work through your feelings on your own too and along with your own personal perspective there are social opinions that are against open marriages. This social "influence" was probably one of the more difficult things I struggled with (aside from the emotions). I was raised like many that this sort of lifestyle was wrong or taboo. Husbands and wives are supposed to remain faithful and sex with anyone else is forbidden. But at the end of the day it was just sex. It was sexual adventures we had and although there was physical intimacy it never rose to level of love making or emotional intimacy that crossed some sort of line. This is just my opinion but something I might ask a critic of my marriage and what the wife has done with other men is how is a one night stand with another person different? By that I mean most of have had a meaningless sexual experiences but that is ok or socially acceptable especially in today's culture. For us it is possible to have sex...that is jut sex. We don't over think it, we don't judge it, we just try to have fun and enjoy it.

It has been my experience that becoming "completely comfortable" took time. I already said how strong my emotional response was at first what I did not say was we did not just dive in, we waded. The first MFM experience we had began with several meets. First meet, the wife gave him a HJ then after he left we shared our thoughts with one another. Agreed to go further and she gave him a BJ. Talked again making sure we were still good and then eventually they fucked. Some people don't need to go this route but it was what we did and after that first guy I was fine with her and other men from that point on. Sorry to be so long winded but it was a great question and I wanted to give you a good answer, at least from my perspective.

 

[jaandaj]

I wouldn't worry about what label you may or may not be.

Got to agree. These labels are just made up names. I could be wrong but the older term cuckold didn't mention anything about being shamed and humiliation.
It was clearly just a man's wife having sexual relations with others.
But it doesn't.


Open communication! Talk to her tell her what u are going through. Encourage her to tell you what she is going through.

Now my issue is the post nut, I then have shame.

As for the cum remorse, alot of us have had it. And even well experienced people can get it or have jealousy pop back up.