My wife is THAT influential friend. Most women, as far as I know, get into this lifestyle thanks to a female friend. My wife doesn't (usually) hook anyone up but does take the time to explain our relationship (both the good and the bad) which other women consider seriously. When it comes from a man they think he's fucking other women/it's a kink.
Does your wife have an influential girlfriend ("wing-girl") that helped her get started?
- Thread starter coastalkid
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MsL&MrB
Couple
My wife and I ended up getting in to this on our own but we later found out 2 of our other couple friends are also into it part of me dose think they may have influenced her a little but I have no way of knowing
Probably May's same friends who set up her bachelorette party at a male strip club and arranged a private room. Apparently May serviced a couple of the strippers. She was still transitioning from thinking sex was only penetration, so pretty freely sucked guys' cocks.
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wingmen help alot! my wife has convinced many women into the lifestyle by telling them how it gets her going and how much she loves feeling all those cocks and if they are bi curious she goes down on them to break the ice, then shows them how to lick her pussy.
I think the "influential friend" is one of THE biggest factors in changing the way women look at non-monogamous sex. All of my wife's friends (mostly all from church) have been the socially accepted monogamous influences. Even those handful of her friends that aren't from church have had no influence in regard to sex.
It's my opinion that sex and the open discussion of it is a social taboo that is pervasive in all of society worldwide. The topic of sex is one that cultural norms inhibit a natural exploration and made to be so uncomfortable that it is associated with perversion and crudeness. None of my friends from the pub ever enter into a discussion about sex. I never talk about sex with even my very closest friends.
That's why sites like this are an attraction to me (even though you/I have to sift through all BS fakers). I want to talk about it! I want to know about the world beyond my own borders! A friend that is close enough to risk talking to is apparently very rare. I think if my wife had such a friend it would make a huge difference in my own ability to have a frank discussion with her. Initiated by me, our discussions are superficial and she suspects they are "porn influenced" and therefore not real. An "influential friend" would give some traction to the talk.
How many friends would your wife say that she has talked about your lifestyle? How many of those went on to enter into an expanded lifestyle?
Romey
Male
Absolutely it helps if she had slut friends. An ex had friends she'd known since grade school who were sex workers (one a stripper/escort, another an escort) so they would always regale her on their lives. Occasionally, they'd invite her along as a bonus for the event.
Mine has had a few influencers, a coupe in the past got her to try everything from sucking off soccer coach, trying E, coke to girl/girl to MFF and I'm recent years having an affair.
Excuse my dumb ass androids auto correct...I'm really not illiterate. LoL
Duber
Male
Oh yeah, always has been...sometimes unbeknownst to me til years later. Lol
Yes...and I hope I get to be balls deep bareback in her, while her husband is balls deep bareback in my wife.
My wife’s BFF and her husband are swingers. They tried for years to get my wife to join them. I’ve done swinging with my ex wife. I tried for years to get my wife to be a hotwife. We have had issues because I have low T and have no desire. I could never have sex with her. I have viagra but it has bad side effects for me. I have testosterone gel but it doesn’t really do anything. I’ve used 6 pumps and it’s not much better. I didn’t think she was ever going to do it but she did. I was her first and only. Now she has had about 5 or 6 other guys. She is still pretty vanilla but has surprised me With some of the things she has done.
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Influences, good and bad, eventually rub off. Our parents taught us that. This is why mentoring is so popular. You want to be sure its not the wrong crowd either, like the drugs. My wife has had several influencer GFs. One has been arround all her life. So they have been toghether trhu each others divorces and affairs.
Recently the woman made it clear that she wants a FMF with her new husband. For other reasons it will probably not happen. But the important thing is that my wife's resistance to a FF has been degrading. She was finally going to allow the woman to experiment with her for old time sake.
My wife has never and will never do drugs. NO matter the influencer. But sexcapades have ocurred thanks to the influence of friends. So they are very important if a wife is not particularly interested from the getgo
Recently the woman made it clear that she wants a FMF with her new husband. For other reasons it will probably not happen. But the important thing is that my wife's resistance to a FF has been degrading. She was finally going to allow the woman to experiment with her for old time sake.
My wife has never and will never do drugs. NO matter the influencer. But sexcapades have ocurred thanks to the influence of friends. So they are very important if a wife is not particularly interested from the getgo
Anneinsecret
Female
My roommate in college was my “wing girl” and got me both started and hooked on having sex with multiple guys.
I think my wife’s best friend telling her stories about fucking guys every weekend helped for sure. It was a mixed bag. The stories were good but the problem for my wife was her friend gets almost passing out drunk every weekend swinging. We went out with them and another couple once and her friend was hammered. That turned my wife off some because she didn’t really think her friend was into it. More she had to get drunk to do it for her husband.
Anneinsecret
Female
Take her to a swingers club one weekend. No pressure to do anything. She can watch. Maybe dance topless. Loosen up and get a feel for it, meet some people without pressure to do anything. In my experience when people know you are new and just feeling things out that are very understanding
I think part of this, which has been an issue with my wife, is that she felt like things I talked about doing were "weird / not things normal people do" but as she's found out some of her friends have done stuff, it has helped to normalize it and make her more receptive.
As far as whether that helps, I think it depends on whether they have a deep down interest or not. Like, in your example, your wife hasn't been influenced to do drugs because that's just not something she has any personal desire to explore. Conversely, my wife has finally admitted the idea of sex with multiple really turns her on... so it's just a matter of getting over the weirdness and influential friends definitely help with that. She has one friend who is definitely helping to pull her in that direction but they haven't been able to get out that much recently and often a 3rd goes with them, who is pretty vanilla and puts a bit of a damper on what might happen. Self confidence is another big issue... She gets hit on all the time but somehow is insecure about her body and doesn't think anyone would want to see it.
Like when we were kids. Parents forbade us stuff. then we find out everyone at school does it and its normal! So it does take time, especially as adults with a formed opinion. I was raised Catholic and even I have had a hard time having extra marital sex and arranging for my wife's escapades when the chance arose. Yes there are also the party poopers. After the 1st time she does it, there will also be a period of regret. Dont discount it. Acknowledge it and let her become curious again. By then, her pussy will also influence her!
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