How did you convince your wife to meet her first lover?

kort6776

Male
Dec 15, 2016
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all you can do is to introduce the idea to her, it is up to her to embrace or reject the concept. the biggest mistake that can be made is to force her into doing something that she doesn't want to do. talk to her about it and see what the reaction is then proceed accordingly
 
Last edited:
Mar 5, 2018
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I have been asked that question many times from men wanting to convince their wife into the lifestyle. To me the answer always starts with simply talking to your lady and telling her what you want. No tricks, lies, getting her drunk, etc. Unfortunately too many men are afraid to be blunt and talk directly to their wife about it. Goog Luck
 

Pippi

Female
Verified
Oct 25, 2020
19
103
73
Dayton, Ohio
I agree with everything said above. Although my husband and I are just starting to explore the open marriage lifestyle, his biggest concern is I'll be doing this for him and not for myself.

We've been talking about this for a long time, years and years, while we had sex! Then that talk eventually made its way outside the bedroom. The more we talked, the more it turned me on!

If we choose to go forward, the truth is... there will always be a part of me that will fuck other men just to please my husband no matter how much I love it and want it!
 

Jontee

Couple
Verified
Apr 28, 2020
372
610
166
England
No to blunt. You need to work on it slowly. It helps to fantasize about it during sex. Do so a bit at a time, judging her reaction/acceptance of it.
Not all women are interested. Take it easy, make it her fantasy also.
Good advice Sgt Ray .. it has to be her choice ..👍
 
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Sgt Ray

Male
Sep 30, 2019
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Nj
TY. Its doesn't/won't work if it's not something she's into.
If she seems interested, asks questions, gets aroused, etc, you can make it a casual, "unplanned " meeting at a bar or pub.
Meet the bull casually, let him start to chat her up, then excuse yourself, to take a call? for a while.
Then let nature take its course.
 

jw_kk

Male
Aug 26, 2017
383
1,777
271
I didn’t - it was her idea.

KK had numerous adulterous encounters, even from the time we were dating.

Her cheating continued on and off even after we were married. She’s also had a long-term incestuous affair with her younger brother - KK fucked him the morning of our wedding day (I found out years later).

Events that occurred during our college years, during a period in which KK’d broken off our engagement led me down the road of fantasizing about her having sex with other men, to the point of it becoming an obsession.

About six months after we’d gotten married, I began the pillow-talk/fantasy role-play thing with her, as a means of satisfying my obsession. Ironically, she wouldn’t indulge my fantasy. She did however conduct affairs, from one-night stands, to longer-term, “traditional” affairs, for the most part behind my back. I tolerated it for the most part, in some cases even denied it was happening. Given my desire and encouragement to have KK engage in sex with other men, it was incongruent, conflicting for me to object to her affairs.

Our transition to hot wifing was actually the result of one of my disastrous, adulterous affairs. It was revenge-driven, and in part a tactic KK used to reel me back in to our marriage when I was on the brink. She started fucking other men, but not hiding it - I simply wasn’t involved or invited to participate. Eventually she brought a stranger to our hotel room when we were traveling on a combined business/pleasure trip. I’d gone up to our suite for a short conference call with overseas colleagues, having left KK in the hotel lounge to finish her drink, and dance. She picked up a guy she found attractive, brought him to our room, and they fucked one another senseless - as if I wasn’t even in the room. That was the first time I watched KK have sex with another man. I will never forget it.
 

Criticalkink

Well-Known Member
Jun 17, 2020
59
174
73
I didn’t - it was her idea.

KK had numerous adulterous encounters, even from the time we were dating.

Her cheating continued on and off even after we were married. She’s also had a long-term incestuous affair with her younger brother - KK fucked him the morning of our wedding day (I found out years later).

Events that occurred during our college years, during a period in which KK’d broken off our engagement led me down the road of fantasizing about her having sex with other men, to the point of it becoming an obsession.

About six months after we’d gotten married, I began the pillow-talk/fantasy role-play thing with her, as a means of satisfying my obsession. Ironically, she wouldn’t indulge my fantasy. She did however conduct affairs, from one-night stands, to longer-term, “traditional” affairs, for the most part behind my back. I tolerated it for the most part, in some cases even denied it was happening. Given my desire and encouragement to have KK engage in sex with other men, it was incongruent, conflicting for me to object to her affairs.

Our transition to hot wifing was actually the result of one of my disastrous, adulterous affairs. It was revenge-driven, and in part a tactic KK used to reel me back in to our marriage when I was on the brink. She started fucking other men, but not hiding it - I simply wasn’t involved or invited to participate. Eventually she brought a stranger to our hotel room when we were traveling on a combined business/pleasure trip. I’d gone up to our suite for a short conference call with overseas colleagues, having left KK in the hotel lounge to finish her drink, and dance. She picked up a guy she found attractive, brought him to our room, and they fucked one another senseless - as if I wasn’t even in the room. That was the first time I watched KK have sex with another man. I will never forget it.
Pretty much the same for us. My wife told me on our first date she could never be in a monogamous relationship. Before me she only dated married men. And then on our first date she proceeded to suck another guys dick. Not in front of me but she sure as hell didn’t have a problem telling what she had just done. Hooked!
 

Sgt Ray

Male
Sep 30, 2019
1,251
1,517
203
Nj
Sometimes u have to be a farmer and plant the seed. She's not gonna forget it once you tell her about it.
If she reacts negatively or isn't interested, well, u know her best. But that seed is in her mind.
Leave it alone, get it grow. Give it time, then carefully circle back to it. Indirectly?
One idea is to take her out to a club or a place with drinks & music. Then mention how some guy(s?) were really checking her out.
Maybe watch some porno which involves 3somes or sharing the lady?
But nothing too heavy handed. Easy does it. Get her interest going. Gently mention it as ur fucking her. Take ur time, let her feel flattered & desirable.
 
Nov 12, 2020
136
316
103
Northeast Iowa, USA
It took years of conversation and then time for her to accept what I was telling her. Then it took the right guy who she wanted bad enough to take the leap. Even then, she didn't actually sleep with that guy because she didn't jump at the time because she wanted to make sure I was 100% certain that this is what I wanted. It took almost another year before another opportunity arose and she followed through. Once she realized that I wasn't going to get upset or jealous, it was just a matter of her meeting the right guys abs following up with each other as the rules evolved. And the rules will evolve! Best of luck!
 

BarbluvsD

Female
Oct 12, 2020
155
1,392
183
Michigan
My experience was a little different than most. Hub was always bringing up swinging, threesomes, and hot wifing. I was vehemently opposed to all of these. What made me change my mind eventually was a lot of talking and time. I started wearing very sexy and revealing outfits on the weekends when we would go out together for dinner or even just shopping. Hub really lived all of the attention that I would get and our sex life improved dramatically as a result.
To make a very long story short, one night he brought a friend from work over to watch the game and have some drinks. He knew that I thought his friend was handsome, so I guess he thought that would be the night he “made the move”. After a fun night of a little drinking and a lot of laughter, hub tells his friend to go upstairs to my bedroom because his wife was great at blow jobs and would give him one.
He didn’t hesitate and walked up the stairs with me just sitting there awestruck. Hub just laughed and asked if I was going to leave the guy hanging or be a “good girl”?
Needless to say I finished my drink, said what the hell, and went up the stairs to be the good girl he had been wanting me to be for several years.
We haven’t looked back since ☺️
Barb
XOXO
 

skoocum

Well-Known Member
Sep 16, 2019
372
217
83
My experience was a little different than most. Hub was always bringing up swinging, threesomes, and hot wifing. I was vehemently opposed to all of these. What made me change my mind eventually was a lot of talking and time. I started wearing very sexy and revealing outfits on the weekends when we would go out together for dinner or even just shopping. Hub really lived all of the attention that I would get and our sex life improved dramatically as a result.
To make a very long story short, one night he brought a friend from work over to watch the game and have some drinks. He knew that I thought his friend was handsome, so I guess he thought that would be the night he “made the move”. After a fun night of a little drinking and a lot of laughter, hub tells his friend to go upstairs to my bedroom because his wife was great at blow jobs and would give him one.
He didn’t hesitate and walked up the stairs with me just sitting there awestruck. Hub just laughed and asked if I was going to leave the guy hanging or be a “good girl”?
Needless to say I finished my drink, said what the hell, and went up the stairs to be the good girl he had been wanting me to be for several years.
We haven’t looked back since ☺️
Barb
XOXO
whoa! what a great start to your adventure! and you gave him head in your bedroom, too!
 
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NXcuck

Well-Known Member
Nov 28, 2018
247
327
103
Hello, how exactly did you encourage your wife to meet her lover for the first time?
It took me about 30 years, persuasion, talking about it during sex , asking about her premarriage experiences etc.Finally sharing porn did it . Her first was a black guy we met on a phone hook up, I was shocked how smoothly the hookup went , when we got to his apartment, a short visiting period , he took her by the hand , we went to his bedroom. In about 2 minutes he was fucking her missionary , she was squirting almost instantly, he was long and hitting her cervix, that drove her crazy. At first she played like she was just laying there taking it , no big deal ; but I knew she was moving it . With encouragement she soon was begging for it and they were sucking tongue while fucking . After a short rest and them making out while I sucked his cock he got her off again with a hard fuck while pulling her hair . The amazing part was on the ride back home after she told me she’d never been fucked like that before , and I said you liked your first black cock huh ? She giggled and said ho ho you forgot I used to run around this particular neighborhood. I didn’t know she had been with a black guy. Honestly I think that was the winning deal black on white porn , and finding her a black man . I could tell she was ready the first time she laid eyes on him .
 
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