So I thought I’d share today’s event with you. My partner has chatted with a man for quite a few months now. They have met for coffee and walks but haven’t been intimate with each other yet for many different reasons. One of them being me having big issues regarding him. She has shared bits of their chat conversations here and there, and also told me things about him every now and then. The main problem for me is that I think he is manipulative with narcissistic tendencies and I feel that he is a person that I would never be friends with. We have had several arguments regarding him and I have a hard time accepting that my partner isn’t bothered (enough) by these things from his personality.
Anyway, the thought of my partner taking him as a new lover have become gradually easier for me to accept, due to her feeling more and more comfortable in her dominant role. I’ve lately begun to feel that the more of a cuck and sissy she makes of me, the easier it gets to accept that she would be with him.
And this afternoon it finally happened. Apparently they had been discussing the possibility to get a hotel room together this evening. I was not at all happy about it, or ready for an ‘all nighter’, so we had another argument over this. But today I started feeling tired of it all and I do want to make this happen for her so the argument kind of morphed into a kind of negotiation instead. Suddenly the all nighter was changed to a couple of hours this afternoon. I was relieved since I knew I would have a hard time with this but it would be far worse if she spent the night with him at this stage.
I wanted to agree to it so I tried negotiating again and asked if there was anything she could “give” me, meaning: something I could get out of this instead of being stuck with only strong negative feelings about her being intimate with this man. Well, we agreed on a couple of things and I took a deep breath and said ‘ok’.
It took her very long time to shower and get dressed so when she was ready to go, it looked like she wouldn’t have time to come home to me before getting our son from daycare. That was huge issue for me since it meant that there would be no cleanup afterwards which meant that I would effectively be stuck with only my negative feelings, the precise thing I didn’t want.
Well, we talked about that and she told me she would try to come home so we could have some time together, even if it wouldn’t be for long. She also said she would try to make a soundrecording of the entire act (she has done this for me on a couple of occasions before).
Well off she went and as I had feared she didn’t come home with the bus we had discussed. I sent her a message saying that our “window” was rapidly closing. After about 15 minutes or so (by then she had been there for well over an hour) she replied:
“On my way”. And then: “I have a recording… AND you’re going to have to do your cleanup duty”.
When she arrived home she was absolutely glowing and also a bit shaky. Her eyes were ecstatic and she rushed into the bedroom to get out of her clothes. She started saying all kinds of thing as I approached her; about how amazing it had been, how she had ridden him for over an hour and my favourite part: “I have never felt this good when riding someone”, which I of course immediately took as meaning “it never was this good riding me”. I felt a rush of these wonderfully mixed emotions of jealousy, excitement, despair and being horny. She kept on telling me different details as I got down to eat her out. It was a little disappointing as she told me she had taken a quick shower afterwards at his request. But she hadn’t washed off everything “down there”, there was still some for me to take care of. So I did and I asked her if she enjoyed me cleaning up after a man I dislike so much, and she said yes. It ended with me giving her an orgasm using my tongue and fingers, then she had to put clothes back on and rush to pick up our son.
I haven’t gotten the recording yet, and she also promised to write down what happened between them. I’m looking forward to both as they will help me come to terms with her taking this particular man as a new lover. I guess we’ve crossed a line today that we probably can’t come back from. She fully intends to see this man again and I have no means to stop it anymore. But in a way it’s a relief as this has been hanging in front of us for so long. Now I can focus on accepting and go deeper into my submissive sissy role that I’m hoping fulfil.
Anyway, the thought of my partner taking him as a new lover have become gradually easier for me to accept, due to her feeling more and more comfortable in her dominant role. I’ve lately begun to feel that the more of a cuck and sissy she makes of me, the easier it gets to accept that she would be with him.
And this afternoon it finally happened. Apparently they had been discussing the possibility to get a hotel room together this evening. I was not at all happy about it, or ready for an ‘all nighter’, so we had another argument over this. But today I started feeling tired of it all and I do want to make this happen for her so the argument kind of morphed into a kind of negotiation instead. Suddenly the all nighter was changed to a couple of hours this afternoon. I was relieved since I knew I would have a hard time with this but it would be far worse if she spent the night with him at this stage.
I wanted to agree to it so I tried negotiating again and asked if there was anything she could “give” me, meaning: something I could get out of this instead of being stuck with only strong negative feelings about her being intimate with this man. Well, we agreed on a couple of things and I took a deep breath and said ‘ok’.
It took her very long time to shower and get dressed so when she was ready to go, it looked like she wouldn’t have time to come home to me before getting our son from daycare. That was huge issue for me since it meant that there would be no cleanup afterwards which meant that I would effectively be stuck with only my negative feelings, the precise thing I didn’t want.
Well, we talked about that and she told me she would try to come home so we could have some time together, even if it wouldn’t be for long. She also said she would try to make a soundrecording of the entire act (she has done this for me on a couple of occasions before).
Well off she went and as I had feared she didn’t come home with the bus we had discussed. I sent her a message saying that our “window” was rapidly closing. After about 15 minutes or so (by then she had been there for well over an hour) she replied:
“On my way”. And then: “I have a recording… AND you’re going to have to do your cleanup duty”.
When she arrived home she was absolutely glowing and also a bit shaky. Her eyes were ecstatic and she rushed into the bedroom to get out of her clothes. She started saying all kinds of thing as I approached her; about how amazing it had been, how she had ridden him for over an hour and my favourite part: “I have never felt this good when riding someone”, which I of course immediately took as meaning “it never was this good riding me”. I felt a rush of these wonderfully mixed emotions of jealousy, excitement, despair and being horny. She kept on telling me different details as I got down to eat her out. It was a little disappointing as she told me she had taken a quick shower afterwards at his request. But she hadn’t washed off everything “down there”, there was still some for me to take care of. So I did and I asked her if she enjoyed me cleaning up after a man I dislike so much, and she said yes. It ended with me giving her an orgasm using my tongue and fingers, then she had to put clothes back on and rush to pick up our son.
I haven’t gotten the recording yet, and she also promised to write down what happened between them. I’m looking forward to both as they will help me come to terms with her taking this particular man as a new lover. I guess we’ve crossed a line today that we probably can’t come back from. She fully intends to see this man again and I have no means to stop it anymore. But in a way it’s a relief as this has been hanging in front of us for so long. Now I can focus on accepting and go deeper into my submissive sissy role that I’m hoping fulfil.
