We're going to our first swingers club and hoping to do a soft swap, but I'm a bit concerned how I'll feel after it. When I'm really horny I'm kinky, after sex I lose all desires. So my question is, how do you guys feel after watch your partner with someone else? Also is the reality as good as the fantasy? How do you last longer? Because I feel like I'd cum straight away, which I don't want to happen.
Feelings after cumming + other questions
- Thread starter Scurra
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I would suggest that this maybe an excellent time for you not to swop but let her go with another man, then assess how you feel about this, it may also make her more relaxed knowing your not doing it with another female and the anxiety she may have. Unless of course she wants you to.
Every normal mans sexual feelings reduce significantly once they have cum, i have countered this over the years by wearing a CB then i remain mentally switch on and kinky through out, then again for me it is all about her taking her physical pleasures and i gain mine mentally.
On the rare occasion i have involutarily cum the fun disappears for me, i am not jealous of my wife but it drains me of my kink.
Good luck either way.
Every normal mans sexual feelings reduce significantly once they have cum, i have countered this over the years by wearing a CB then i remain mentally switch on and kinky through out, then again for me it is all about her taking her physical pleasures and i gain mine mentally.
On the rare occasion i have involutarily cum the fun disappears for me, i am not jealous of my wife but it drains me of my kink.
Good luck either way.
Yup, POB (Post Orgasm Blues) - my only solution was to NOT cum! After a few times attending you should be able to get over the jealousy and it shouldn't be an issue, but until then.
I usually have a plethora of feelings. Jealousy is there but it is nothing compared to the feelings of elation I feel. I love watching my wife enjoy herself. I truly feel it is a gift from her allowing me to watch. She is vulnerable, she has given herself to a man and he is impaling himself into her and depositing himself in her. Letting me watch that is the greatest gift my wife has ever given me.
YES! At least for me. I will admit it was different than what I fantasized about but it is great.
The condition for me to watch was I had the be caged. So my little cock “cries” tears of joy the whole time she is enjoying a real cock inside her.
We have only limited experience but many, many times with this one guy we know.
Different guy once, another guy 3 times, another couple once. Couple was fun but only happened once. 3 times guy was just too aggressive for us. One time guy didn't go well at all. Obviously we like it with our guy friend.
First time we ever did anything like this was with our guy friend. Drinks, hot tub, got naked, nothing happened, we'd don't this befor with him and others.
He was leaving, getting dressed, wife and me still naked, kinda normal for these type back yard bbq deals...with select people. They hugged then kissed goodbye. Then all this happened quick...turned into a French kiss, bodies tight against each other. She bends over the couch, he fucked her. Maybe 2 minutes start to finish. I didn't know what to think. He finished, none of us said anything. He left. Wife started crying, apologized over and over. I wasn't mad, more like what just happened? Wife crying...took a shower, we went to bed, laying there silent forever. She asked if I was OK, we hugged, ended up having fantastic sex till about 2am. Wife never would admit but she was into this whole thing and how turned on she was for days after.
We just worked up from there. Now we're all comfy together.
It took quite a few times to get comfy enough to let go and enjoy for all 3 of us. After I cum I do have weird thoughts in my head for sure but as he's starting with her for his second round my feelings quickly go away and I just sit back and watch, soon my dick is hard again and I'll have another round with her. It's fun.
Wife on the other hand is more turned on each time one of us does her(cums with her). That's what makes this fun. If my wife didn't enjoy this with him...and me especially after he's gone I don't think we'd enjoy this.
We are very normal people, conservative, polite, classy, good looking. None of our friends know we do this. Our sex life is fantastic.
Different guy once, another guy 3 times, another couple once. Couple was fun but only happened once. 3 times guy was just too aggressive for us. One time guy didn't go well at all. Obviously we like it with our guy friend.
First time we ever did anything like this was with our guy friend. Drinks, hot tub, got naked, nothing happened, we'd don't this befor with him and others.
He was leaving, getting dressed, wife and me still naked, kinda normal for these type back yard bbq deals...with select people. They hugged then kissed goodbye. Then all this happened quick...turned into a French kiss, bodies tight against each other. She bends over the couch, he fucked her. Maybe 2 minutes start to finish. I didn't know what to think. He finished, none of us said anything. He left. Wife started crying, apologized over and over. I wasn't mad, more like what just happened? Wife crying...took a shower, we went to bed, laying there silent forever. She asked if I was OK, we hugged, ended up having fantastic sex till about 2am. Wife never would admit but she was into this whole thing and how turned on she was for days after.
We just worked up from there. Now we're all comfy together.
It took quite a few times to get comfy enough to let go and enjoy for all 3 of us. After I cum I do have weird thoughts in my head for sure but as he's starting with her for his second round my feelings quickly go away and I just sit back and watch, soon my dick is hard again and I'll have another round with her. It's fun.
Wife on the other hand is more turned on each time one of us does her(cums with her). That's what makes this fun. If my wife didn't enjoy this with him...and me especially after he's gone I don't think we'd enjoy this.
We are very normal people, conservative, polite, classy, good looking. None of our friends know we do this. Our sex life is fantastic.
Like most men I lose interest once I cum. Thats why I rarely do quickies. When I make love to my wife I make sure I give her 2 or 3 orgasms before I enter her. Usually once with fingers, once with tongue and at least once while we actually fuck before I cum. However when our FwB visits I find I dont lose interest. He fucks her tonight and I'll fuck her all day tomorrow. After seeing her with him I cant get enough of her for the next couple of days.
And the real thing is far better than the fantasy.
And the real thing is far better than the fantasy.
I can relate
When our friend is with us I watch till he's done, sometimes 20 minutes sometimes an hour. I take a turn, I try not to cum too quick but it's difficult, I'm so turned on from watching and wife is super turned on and fucks me so good. After I cum we lay there for a minute kissing. I pull out roll over and we all usually chat for a few while he relaxes and gets hard again so it's really easy to unwind, enjoy and get ready for more. There have been times I do her first, after I cum he slides into her right after. It takes me a few to get into watching and enjoy the show. But overall it's a fun night.
Pretty much same as us. Usually he fucks 1st but when I get to go 1st Im usually hard again by the time he has finished. After watching her with another man seems to trip my libido switch to on. lol
The reality is far, far better than the fantasy, but it is extraordinarily intense. Decreased arousal is a normal physiological response after orgasm and ejaculation in males. You can train your way out of it, learning to separate orgasm from ejaculation, but it takes effort. Other means include use of an ED drug, a cock-ring or strap, or both. Delaying your own gratification is also an answer, i.e. waiting it out, until she's done, then pitching in at the end.
Sometimes the experience is so intense orgasm and ejaculation happen spontaneously, hands-free. In that case, you just have to ride out your refractory period.
Hey....couple of questions...
Is he a regular? How often? Regular thing for us with him. 2-3 times a month
Where you guys do this? Motel? Usually our home, been to his place twice
You guys ages.? We're early 50s, he's 33
Thanks
Yes, he is a regular and only one.
Usually meet up every couple of months for a weekend. He lives quite a distance away now.
Usually at our home or his.
We are in our 60s he is in his 50s.
One of my favorite things to do is be a sissy for my side lover,which includes sucking his big cock in panties, him fucking me and in general being his sissy bitch. I never cum when I'm with him because I don't want to lose interest, lose my kink or become not horny. I can always cum after I get home. The important thing for me is to enjoy our sessions for as long as possible since I only need this every 10 weeks or so,otherwise I'm eating n fucking my hot gf. until my desire for cock strikes again.
I try not to cum so I can continue being more and more submissive sissy-fem to pleasure others cocks.
I’ll admit the jealousy is there when she’s enjoying another cock along with the degrading and humiliating feeling but oddly it is hot but does suck at the time
Seeing her truly loving it is great but still sucks
If you get what I mean
Seeing her truly loving it is great but still sucks
If you get what I mean
To me it's not degrading or humiliating. I'm helping her to get what she wants, to help her get pleasure. My job is her happiness, if not from me than I need to pave the way for others. It is a show of love that I and willing to make sure she gets that happiness albeit from others.
To use an analogy, think of it as a meal. If she likes seafood and I don't, it would be wrong of me to deny her a seafood meal. I'd take her to a seafood restaurant for her enjoyment and I'd order something from the menu I eat and savor the enjoyment, the pleasure she's getting that I facilitated.
Along those lines, if I can't cook a good meal for her to enjoy it'd be selfish to constantly have her eat my poor cooking. But if I arranged meals that were better that she enjoyed it'd be a plus.
Her pleasure, her enjoyment, was made possible by me, I DID THAT.
A happy wife is a happy wife.
When I first developed this kink, I had been married for years and developed feelings that I was not enough for my wife. The first time I masturbated and came to thinking about her fucking someone else I spurted so hard and so much cum, it was the best orgasm I could ever remember having and that confused me. I felt all the typical withdrawal feelings and post nut clarity.
Having said that, over the years I learned to nut and then get hard again. Let the thing that turned you on keep turning you on. It takes some getting used too and it’s harder to cum again but it gets you back into the feeling and removed that post nut clarity feeling of what am I doing and what is wrong with me.
Having said that, over the years I learned to nut and then get hard again. Let the thing that turned you on keep turning you on. It takes some getting used too and it’s harder to cum again but it gets you back into the feeling and removed that post nut clarity feeling of what am I doing and what is wrong with me.
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