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- Thread starter R&Rlove
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That’s sounds like a good plan R&R. It does take time to find the right bull. A gal will most likely be easier. My wife is the same type as yours, in appearance anyway. I’ve found that as time goes on, she has loosened up.
Discretefun66
Male
;-) When we first started we had a lot of "talks" about it. Over the years our perspective has changed quite a bit. At first we had established many rules but we quickly realized too many rules interfered with the overall enjoyment of the adventure. From the husbands perspective I can tell you my biggest hurdle was my own ego. Jealousy can be a big problem here, and any insecurity can ruin something special. So one thing I would say is make sure you really are prepared to see another man please your wife. From the wife's perspective knowing that this is something that your husband desires is important but above that you have to want it too. This is about being able to relax, enjoy, and be confident with yourself. Don't want to get to deep in to it but other men will desire you regardless of what you might think so don't worry about that. The big thing is make sure you desire them, there has to be some sort of attraction for you and I don't mean looks. This is a mistake my husband has made before and we laugh about how some of the men I have enjoyed myself with would not have been who he would have thought. For both of you remember it is all about the sex, fulfilling desires, trying new things and growing as a couple. For us our adventures have only made our marriage stronger and us closer as a couple, in our humble opinion this is what the goal should be. Feel free to ask any questions if you have any, best of luck.
I understand and agree completely. We are still talking and discussing the thought of it and this isn't something we are looking to do without the other present. We are discussing adding a third person only. This isn't a cuck/bull thing or I can't satisfy her so we want to get someone who can. We simply want to experiment with a third. Male or female doesn't really matter. The key is that we both "vibe" with the person. We want to meet someone. I want it to seem and feel totally casual and I don't intend to SPAM. The first time or two that we meet it may go no further than drinks, laughs, talking, etc. I want to see how I feel about the person and more importantly how SHE feels about the person. But in the end, if either disapproves, that's the end of it. A no is a no. We WANT this to happen soon, but we are in no rush at all to make it happen. It has to feel natural (to the furthest extent that it can).
Discretefun66
Male
Sounds like you both are on the right track. It has never been a cuck/bull thing for us either. We both have enjoyed what has happened just for different reasons. You hit it on the head when you side right vibe. That has been so important to us to find the right person is on the same page as us. Someone who "gets it" and understands the situation. We have had countless conversations with people through emails and the "vibe" just wasn't right so it never went further than that. We have met many people as well and after a face to face we decided not to go further. We would add that we establish a sort of screening process to help weed out people for lack of a better term. You two may considered something like this, whether it is like ours where we first talk through email and then have a no strings attached meet or something that works for you two. We have stuck to our way and it has worked great, and the not rushing and waiting for it to feel natural...spot on.
It sounds almost impersonal to screen people but I understand it has to be done. And I definitely like the idea of going into an pre-planned process of, as you said, weeding out the wrong people for us. I'm trying to be very cautious and do this in a way that is respectful to all parties and honestly won't settle for anyone who approaches the opportunity with any less respect. I've gotten a few messages that are straight to the point (which I like to a degree) but are very crass and that is where they lose me. "Hey I wanna f*ck your wife". I tend to just not respond at all but in my head I'm thinking, "yeah, who wouldn't? I'm not low on guys who wanna have sex with my wife, I'm low on people I'd LET do so." When I get comments and feed back like yours and a few others ive recieved here I have hope and try to chat. But the rest of the messages just tell me this (the internet) isn't the way to find the right kind of people).
Hi there, your description of the progress of where you and your Wife are at in this is very similar to us about 3 years ago. We have had a few really great experiences that live in our dirty minds for month later. We are really into things feeling good, total respect, clearly stated boundaries that are discussed prior to our dates. I apologize for my long message, it's my first time here also, so I am not sure what can't be said or not said. I have a dirty mouth in my private life, so I will read the rules and follow them. Thanks
You are really attractive. I love your hair and your glasses. I hope you get the attention you deserve. Enjoy your evening.
Mrs.CC would be a get source if info for you, she is a total babe and great little slut open to expressing her views and talents.
@R&Rlove Sounds very similar to my wife and I. We live in SoCal. Been verified members on here for years.
Some background:
1. Last year we joined a popular swingers site that resulted in meeting another local couple at a restaurant for a few drinks. The other couple arrived late and the wife in the other couple was not in the mood following a long work day. Plus she already had a boyfriend on the side so she wasn't interested in another man. Her husband was looking for a girlfriend (my wife) that's why they showed up. This mis-match made the whole experience uncomfortable for my wife and I. Our casual encounter ended and we haven't done another one since.
2. Around the same time last year we also joined a local swingers/singles club in our area but never attended, partly because the couple we met with above were also members of same club. Nevertheless watching my wife in the gloryhole booth would be fun but we just can't seem to pull the trigger. We have a family too, which makes getting away for an evening tough most the time.
3. My wife use to only date girls and we've had a few threesomes with others females over the ten years we've been married. Each time lots of fun for everyone!! I suggest exploring with another female first (married or not) and see how it goes. Let them go in the room alone first to start, then join them 10-15 minutes later. If all goes well then move onto option 2 = wife with another man.
4. One of my old friends from highschool 20+yrs ago revealed last year how her and her husband are swingers but after hanging out with them we didn't mesh and nothing happened. My highschool friend was flaky and her hubs was an ahole. Nope.
5. Im 40 and hung. My wife is 34 and hot. I'd be ok with our wives having fun together since it doesn't bother my wife and I (done it before). Zero jealousy. On the other hand if our wives want to go farther and hangout with another man (us) then we can discuss and proceed but only if it feels right for everyone since we've all never done that before.
Sharing all of this data so you know it takes time and in many cases might not even happen for one reason or the other.
*Planning, comfort and safety are all a must for us!!
We're in no rush to meet new couples but if you guys or anyone else on here (couple or female) is located in SoCal and interested in making new friends...feel free to DM us anytime and we'll see where it goes.
Some background:
1. Last year we joined a popular swingers site that resulted in meeting another local couple at a restaurant for a few drinks. The other couple arrived late and the wife in the other couple was not in the mood following a long work day. Plus she already had a boyfriend on the side so she wasn't interested in another man. Her husband was looking for a girlfriend (my wife) that's why they showed up. This mis-match made the whole experience uncomfortable for my wife and I. Our casual encounter ended and we haven't done another one since.
2. Around the same time last year we also joined a local swingers/singles club in our area but never attended, partly because the couple we met with above were also members of same club. Nevertheless watching my wife in the gloryhole booth would be fun but we just can't seem to pull the trigger. We have a family too, which makes getting away for an evening tough most the time.
3. My wife use to only date girls and we've had a few threesomes with others females over the ten years we've been married. Each time lots of fun for everyone!! I suggest exploring with another female first (married or not) and see how it goes. Let them go in the room alone first to start, then join them 10-15 minutes later. If all goes well then move onto option 2 = wife with another man.
4. One of my old friends from highschool 20+yrs ago revealed last year how her and her husband are swingers but after hanging out with them we didn't mesh and nothing happened. My highschool friend was flaky and her hubs was an ahole. Nope.
5. Im 40 and hung. My wife is 34 and hot. I'd be ok with our wives having fun together since it doesn't bother my wife and I (done it before). Zero jealousy. On the other hand if our wives want to go farther and hangout with another man (us) then we can discuss and proceed but only if it feels right for everyone since we've all never done that before.
Sharing all of this data so you know it takes time and in many cases might not even happen for one reason or the other.
*Planning, comfort and safety are all a must for us!!
We're in no rush to meet new couples but if you guys or anyone else on here (couple or female) is located in SoCal and interested in making new friends...feel free to DM us anytime and we'll see where it goes.
Mrs.CC would be a great female to open her up and explore her interest in another female. However you might not get her back again, she might enjoy her too much the hot little devil. She would eat her raw!!!!
If you could choose 1 part of my body to see, which would it be? Pm me with the answer and you'll get your reward😊(mrscc)
Discretefun66
Male
Understand it can seem impersonal to screen potential partners but we can tell you it has been very very rare that we ever encountered a potential "friend" who did not understand why we did this. Being cautious has always been one of our top priorities as well. We got out fare share of crass or aggressive responses but that does make it easier to get through those who respond. Typically when we have advertised we get double digit responses so when a guy acts like a jackass it makes it easier to get through them all by eliminating anyone disrespectful....lol. As far as the internet goes we can only speak for ourselves. Of all our adventures there has only been one that we did not use the internet in some way to find a partner. We have just found it easier to connect with people looking for the same thing. In the past it has been Yahoo or Craigslist and currently it would be Doublelist or Adult Friend Finder but there are many other sources. You got to go with works best for you two. It would be interesting to run across someone and start a conversation that would lead to us revealing our lifestyle to them, guess we just haven't gotten bold enough to try it......yet.
This sweet young thing doesn't know how gorgeous she is to men. Since she is shy have her PM me to talk. We're not face to face so should be easier for her to loosen up, be a little daring. Let her do it alone so she doesn't feel pressure from you watching or listening. She can be naughty if she choses that way and talk freely or share pictures.
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